Before

[jadestarwalking]

Before You Self-Harm
write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:



how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
I will feel more grounded, more like myself, less full of panic


what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?

hurting myself will bring a calmness to me. it will take away my sister's trust in my safty being home and not in I/P

how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?

I want to feel stable, I want to feel good about myself. this would get me farther from my goal because it helps in the short term but is a hinderance in the long run

if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
The relief would get me through the night. Tomorrow, when the feelings may return, I don't know, I will prolly hurt myself again


what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
I could use my crisis box and play with my stuff, or do something crafty. that would make me feel good temparally, but the feelings will return faster

how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
Ashamed if I SI, good if I use my coping skils

what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?
I really want to scream, or take some more Klonopin and go go bed. I should use my coping skills, they are healthy

urges aren't necessarily the enemy. they happen for reasons, and they're an expression of a desire to stay alive and stay sane and keep coping. remember that.

More Before Questions To Answer



Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
went out in public alone today, the baby is screaming, my sister isn't listening to me, and my dad telling me that he has been drinking again. All of these have made me very anxious

Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
I have been here before, and I hurt myself then. I was upset with myself for giving into my urges

What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
I did this. I could distance myself from all the chaos until my meds kick in

How do I feel right now?
anxious

How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
calm, in control

How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
still calm after, ashamed tomorrow morning

Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
I need to deal with these stressors, one thing I can do is to take my meds when the panic first strikes

Do I need to hurt myself?
I feel like I have to, but deep inside I don't want to, I want to go SI free.