after
Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 10:42 pm
have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait.
yes, sort of...at work, so what I can do is limited but I've done what I can
what had happened just before?
I felt like I was going to burst into tears at my desk again, and I didn't want to.
what were you thinking and feeling?
I was feeling scared and panicked. And I was thinking about all the bad possibilites of this situation and what could happen.
why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?
Not really a final straw, I just...lost the desire to fight it anymore. I had fought the desire and urge since yesterday and it made it impossible for me to do anything else.
were there outside factors like drugs, alsohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how?
not really, maybe lack of sleep...but only a little.
what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work?
I tried to call my T again, she was still busy.
I tried to talk to my boyfriend but felt guilty about complaining to him again.
in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they?
Probably not allowing myself to stop talking to my BF, since it really does help and I had no reason to feel guilty. Or writing, writing tends to help.
how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?
Its not exactly resolved...the situation still exists, the worst could still happen and there's nothing I can do about that. but at least I can stop thinking about it nonstop for awhile.
are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation?
um..probably, not sure, it depends on how soon this other situation gets resolved. hopefully that will be soon.
what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying.
1. call my T, or pdoc if my T is not available.
2. talk to my boyfriend or friends with no guilt about it
3. write what I am feeling or thinking.
yes, sort of...at work, so what I can do is limited but I've done what I can
what had happened just before?
I felt like I was going to burst into tears at my desk again, and I didn't want to.
what were you thinking and feeling?
I was feeling scared and panicked. And I was thinking about all the bad possibilites of this situation and what could happen.
why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?
Not really a final straw, I just...lost the desire to fight it anymore. I had fought the desire and urge since yesterday and it made it impossible for me to do anything else.
were there outside factors like drugs, alsohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how?
not really, maybe lack of sleep...but only a little.
what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work?
I tried to call my T again, she was still busy.
I tried to talk to my boyfriend but felt guilty about complaining to him again.
in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they?
Probably not allowing myself to stop talking to my BF, since it really does help and I had no reason to feel guilty. Or writing, writing tends to help.
how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?
Its not exactly resolved...the situation still exists, the worst could still happen and there's nothing I can do about that. but at least I can stop thinking about it nonstop for awhile.
are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation?
um..probably, not sure, it depends on how soon this other situation gets resolved. hopefully that will be soon.
what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying.
1. call my T, or pdoc if my T is not available.
2. talk to my boyfriend or friends with no guilt about it
3. write what I am feeling or thinking.
but i like drawing them - it makes me focus and stops the voices in my head similarly to how si can... so i keep drawing even if its terrible