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Before:

Before You Self-Harm
write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:

• how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
  It won't there's no way out anyway-
• what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
  it will bring something real, pain, a way to scream. It will hurt my friends I'm trying to have them help me but it's so hard and I feel like I'm always taking and never giving enough. Part of me just thinks everyone is better off without me
• how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
  I don't know anymore, I don't have any long term plans, goals, any of that. If I don't get into grad school I don't know what I'll do, I don't even know if there's a point in all of this anymore it's too hard.
• if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
  I don't know, I will hurt myself some more maybe. I just want to escape and go away
• what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
  talk, as soon as I think that I think I've ruined everyones fun enough as it is, why ruin it more
• how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
  stupid. annoying and way too needy
• what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?

to cry, to be held and told everything is going to be ok

urges aren't necessarily the enemy. they happen for reasons, and they're an expression of a desire to stay alive and stay sane and keep coping. remember that.

More Before Questions To Answer

• Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
  I hate myself I hate myself I hate myself. I'm a drain, I'm a loser, I can't do anything, I feel like I'm missing out on a ton of stuff and there's nothing I can do. I'm just tired, I don't know any other reason. Well I was hoping to be moved out of my place but I don't think it's going to happen
• Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
  yeah, I took a bunch of pills. Then I felt dumb. I talked to my friends one time but I still felt guilty
• What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
  tried to be around my friends but I just felt like my badness would rub off so I left. I can go back and talk with them. I could go down to the coffee shop and see if willow is there
• How do I feel right now?
  like crap
• How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
  deserving
• How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
  right after, probably relief, in the morning I will feel stupid and like a failure.
• Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
  I need to have my doc switch my meds they are screwing around with my mood too much
• Do I need to hurt myself?

need probably no...

Remember you don't have to answer all the questions if you don't feel up to it.