Before You Self-Harm
write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:
* how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
I will feel relieved and feel in control of my emotions
* what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
* how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
Closer. I want to be free of the pain I feel right now.
* if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
The relief will last until I fall asleep and i might get a full nights sleep
* what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
Not alot. I need to go to bed. I feel like shit. I feel lonely. There is nothing I can do really. I'm scared if I don't i won't sleep.
* how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
* what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?
I want to be with my ex..but that just makes me hurt even more
urges aren't necessarily the enemy. they happen for reasons, and they're an expression of a desire to stay alive and stay sane and keep coping. remember that.
More Before Questions To Answer
* Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
I feel lonely. I feel like no one cares. I miss my Mum. I hate that I don't see my sister because she lives on the other side of the world. I miss my ex. I hate myself for pushing here away.
* Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
Yes.
* What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
* How do I feel right now?
* How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
In control of my life. I will feel like I am punishing myself for pushing her away.
* How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
* Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
* Do I need to hurt myself?
Before
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