Questions to Answer After A Slip
slips are chances to learn. You figure out what stresses are still too hard for you and you can work on how you'll deal with them next time you run into them. So instead of beating yourself up, take action.
- Have you taken care of your physical wounds? If not, go do that now. We'll wait.
Well, enough - What had happened just before?
I realized that I read the train schedule wrong and I'm going to miss my job interview - What were you thinking and feeling?
Fat, useless, frustrated, hopeless, stupid... and a great myriad of other self-loathing words/feelings - Why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? Was there an event that was the final straw? What was it?
Definitely realizing that I'm not going to be able to get back to campus for my interview, but it's been something that has been building since last night - How did the situation get to the final straw stage? Trace it back through the events that led up to the last event. Look for some point at which you could have made a different decision and not arrived at the final straw.
Talked to C last night. She weighs less than me, so now I feel fat. My mom called to inform me that I read the schedule wrong. Then completely dismissed my plan to just drive to campus. Plus previous things; it was all just adding up. I guess I could have written before. And before that, I should have thrown away my tools last week, when everything was better. It wouldn't have avoided anything, but it would have at least made it harder. - Were there outside factors like drugs, alcohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? Can you address those in the future? how?
No - What other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? How well did they work?
I didn't. Adding to the wonderful feeling of failure. - In retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? What were they?
Ya, writing, distracting myself, calling someone, etc. I know all of the coping methods. I just always fail to use them. - Name at least two things you will do to help yourself remember those coping methods if you end up in this situation again.
I hope not to be in the situation again. New rule: I'm not allowed to be at home by myself. - How do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? Is it resolved? If not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?
Not yet. I tried to resolve it. I emailed the interview lady. Hopefully she'll email me back soon.
- Are you likely to be in that emotional place again? How will you recognize it when you're in that situation?
Probably. I still am. Hurting myself didn't do shit.
- What will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? List three specific things you will commit to trying.
Same as always.
1. Write
2. Distract myself- fill out useless online surveys, listen to music, watch a movie
3. Talk/Call someone
About Opportunities to SI
Opportunity to Self-Harm seems to be a common theme. Think about why opportunities are important to slips and learn why opportunity is important to you.
- What made that opportunity more appealing than any other?
It was so easy. - Did you make an opportunity or was it there for the taking?
It was right there. I had tools on me. No one is home except for me. It, honestly couldn't get an easier. - What would you have done if there was no opportunity, how would you have handled your urge?
I don't know. I think a lot of it had to do with the situation and the large amount of opportunity I had. - If there had been no opportunity would your urge to self-harm have increased or decreased?
Probably been the same. - What consitutes opportunity for you? Being alone? having new tools? waiting for the right feeling?
Being alone. - If your opportunties were taken away, how would you feel?
I don't know. Last week proved I can do it. It probably make an opportunity.