before

[zombiepeople]

how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
Hopefully the feeling will go away long enough to where I can sleep tonight without crying all night...as for the situation...it won't change anything.

what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
It will make me feel calmer and more comfortable...it won't really take anything away from the situation


how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
I want to feel better cuz I haven't felt better in a long time. Hurting myself really won't get me anywhere, but will give me some temporary relief at least


if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
It'll last probably until tomorrow when I go to school and have to hide everything from everyone...then I'll feel really guilty, then I'll probably do it again

what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
I could try to calm down and color pictures or something like that.


how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
I'll feel bad tomorrow because I'll feel like I let everyone down. I probably still won't have any relief that I want though if I color or something else like that now.


what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?
i really want to cut...I can try to do some of the other things without hurting myself to distract myself


Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
A lot of bad things have been going on recently and have been getting worse, and more was added today when one of my best friends passed out at school, and I keep dreaming of my step-brother who died recently and...just everything's going on right now...


Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
I've been here before, but with different things that have been making me really stressed. Usually I end up hurting myself eventually, but i do try to distract myself for awhile...but I usually end up failing.


What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
I've already started hurting myself, but just using needles, but I'm going to try not to do anything else...maybe i'll do an art project or write in my journal.


How do I feel right now?
depressed, tired, anxious, suicidal, like hurting myself


How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
Calm, relaxed, like i'm in control of the situations


How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
After I'll feel better for awhile, but tomorrow i'll feel really bad, ashamed, and guilty about it.


Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
I can't really avoid it because there are so many different situations, and when some of them start to get a little better, more come up.

Do I need to hurt myself?
I dont' know...I dont' know what to do.