slips are chances to learn. you figure out what stresses are still too hard for you and you can work on how you'll deal with them next time you run into them. so instead of beating yourself up, take action.
- have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait.
Yes, all bandaged - what had happened just before?
Nothing, really - what were you thinking and feeling?
I was thinking about how much I wanted to SI, how good it would feel. I was feeling depressed, like I might want to SU - why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?
I ended up hurting myself because the urges had been building and I just couldn't handle them anymore. The final straw was the SU feelings I have been having. - how did the situation get to the final straw stage? trace it back through the events that led up to the last event. look for some point at which you could have made a different decision and not arrived at the final straw.
An earlier appt with my pdoc may have prevented the final straw stage. I see her on Tuesday. However I do not think that one specific event led up to this incident. - were there outside factors like drugs, alsohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how?
I took my prescribed meds so I could go to bed. - what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work?
I made a list just like I said I would do. I weeded the garden, made white chocolate covered pretzels, did some laundry, worked on knitting a sweater, watched TV. I am trying to keep mysefl occupied. I talked to some people. I listened to the rain. - in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they?
I can't think of anything else. I'd be open to suggestions, though. - name at least two things you will do to help yourself remember those coping methods if you end up in this situation again.
- how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?
My depresses has eased to a tolerable level. I feel ok about this. I am not as upset as I usually am over the fact that I SIed. I feel relief and I am grateful.
- are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation?
Yes. I recognize it when I start sinking lower and lower into my pit of despair.
- what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying.
What else is there for me to do? I already tried so much!
About Opportunities to SI
Opportunity to Self-Harm seems to be a common theme. Think about why opportunities are important to slips and learn why opportunity is important to you.
- What made that opportunity more appealing than any other?
I was upset and alone - Did you make an opportunity or was it there for the taking?
It was just there - What would you have done if there was no opportunity, how would you have handled your urge?
I probably would have had a panic attack or attempted SU - If there had been no opportunity would your urge to self-harm have increased or decreased?
Increased, I believe - What consitutes opportunity for you? Being alone? having new tools? waiting for the right feeling?
I need to be alone, and have the 'right feeling'. This feeling being depression, despair, lowness. - If your opportunties were taken away, how would you feel?
I would feel very agitated and upset.