bus

I don’t understand why people who don’t understand self harm that they think that is the main frigin problem. I cant understand it at the moment though. Self harmed at school on Thursday morning because I had had a nightmare about self harm and hospitalization and i also hadn’t self harmed for a week or more, I dunno. So this nightmare was fucking lifelike scared me seriously. So I self harmed at school, my TA found out because I need a band aid and sickbay at school makes a huge fuss when I self harm, so I hate it but I need a band aid and so my TA helped me but then on Friday morning she went to see the school counselor so I had to talk him about it even though I had spoken to my outside school counselor the afternoon of the day I had self harmed. I just felt weird because I just hate people finding out and it makes me even more depressed.

I felt guilty and like I had done something wrong.


silentgirl

Hi silentgirl

It sounds to me like you're very frustrated with other peoples' reactions to your self-injury...that's understandable.

I think it's easy to become frustrated with other peoples' reactions because 1) We're not really sure ourselves what reaction we want 2) It's such a difficult behaviour to understand, for those that don't so it themselves, that they literally have no idea what to do in the face of it. They just know that they want it to *stop*, because who wants a loved one to continue hurting themselves?

There's a family/friends forum on bus for people who are trying to understand why people around them self-harm...a lot of users who self-harm themselves read and post there...perhaps it would help you to understand why people react the way they do when you self-harm.

Before and After is a forum for people who are trying to understand their urges to self-harm for themselves. There are questions to fill out that will help you think about your urges and what's behind them, and help you to learn from them. Urges are not your enemy, and you can always learn from a slip. Take a look around and see how others have used the questions, see if they are something that you think will help you.

I'm a moderator on Before and After; let me or another moderator know if you have any questions.