write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:
- how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
In no way at all. - what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
Nothing. It will make me afraid to go to the swimming pool, so I won't be able to exercise. And I won't be able to see my nieces swim. And that will suck. - how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
Like I've done everything I can do. Like if it doesn't happen it won't be because of something I didn't do. Hurting myself will not make me any closer to feeling this way. - if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
Hurting myself doesn't seem like the best option. - what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
Play games. Tell my friend I'll go to dinner with her and her mother tomorrow. It will make me feel good, because I'm doing more stuff with my friend. - how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
I'll feel like shit. I'll feel great, because I'll be going out with my friend. - what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?
Play games. Communicate with people