Before You Self-Harm
write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:
how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself? I think I will feel better, less anxious but I will also feel guilty
what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation? Guilt. Anxiety.
how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way? I want to feel good about myself. No I don't think so.
if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then? It will only last until the blood stops
what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then? I could check out coping and games. It will distract me as long as I keep doing them. Then I could take a shower to self-soothe.
how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with? I will feel guilty but also I don't know, maybe relief. If I do the other thing, I don't know how I will feel. Still stressed.
what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?
I really want to try and not SI. I can try to feel the feelings instead.
More Before Questions To Answer
Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point? I need to hurt myself because I feel really anxious. What brought me to this point is my bf took too many pills and scared me and my T left for 3 weeks vacation today.
Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then? Yes, distracted, self-soothed. I felt better.
What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me? I've come on here. I can go to coping and games. I can take a shower. I can cross-stitch or sew.
How do I feel right now? Really scared lonely and anxious
How will I feel when I am hurting myself? I will feel at peace.
How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning? Guilty.
Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future? I've done the best I can so far.
Do I need to hurt myself?
Not at the moment, but maybe later.
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Before
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