after...

tools to help you assess your urges before you give in to them, and to help you understand and learn from slips after they happen. by posting here, you're saying that you are serious about exploring the feelings behind your self-harm in depth, whether you're ready to stop hurting yourself or not. to request posting access, click usergroups above and join before and after.

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zombiepeople
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after...

Post by zombiepeople » Sat Feb 03, 2007 5:38 am

have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait.
Yea, but I;m probably going to have to clense them with alcohol again so they don;t get infected

what had happened just before?
I had just found out that the original court sentencing for my mom and stepdad had been moved a month back and I;ve been waiting a year to get this all over with and now it's gong to take longer and school and I just couldn't do it anymore


what were you thinking and feeling?
I was depressed, hurt, angry, stressed


why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?
This was it, I had been looking forward to having all this court and legal nonsence out of the way and now I find out that I have to wait longer and i just couldn't deal with it then

how did the situation get to the final straw stage? trace it back through the events that led up to the last event. look for some point at which you could have made a different decision and not arrived at the final straw. I was at school and I just got really upset and began to cry, and then things just got out of hand and I couldn;t really control myself at all


were there outside factors like drugs, alsohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how? Yea probably being off my meds becuase I had taken them the night beofre, but I threw up right afterf and so I really didn;'t take them, and so I was already feeling really bad when i went to school in the first place.


what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work? I was at school, so there really wasnt' much I could do, but I did try to listen to music and I wrote to myself and I talked to my friends, but I still couldn't resis the urge...


in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they? I could have probably gone to the nurse or something and just sat in there instead of in the bathroom all by myself, but then I'd have had to explain why I was skipping class.


name at least two things you will do to help yourself remember those coping methods if you end up in this situation again. Try to ignore my feelings until I get home and have more coping skills and options avaliable. Again I can write to myself, talk to my therapist, get on the computer, hold an icecube and stuff like that

how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution? No the situation is not resolved as of yet and will not be for the next month and I still feel really bad.


are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation? Yeah I;m likely to be in this state again and I never know when it is or how bad it's going to be. In those states, I just try to focus on what's going on around me so that I don't freak out even more, especially when I;m somewhere like school.


what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying. Talking more to a friend, writing and drawing, drawing on myself with a pen or marker or something like that...I don't know there really aren't many options at school if you're skipping class and hiding in a bathroom, so I didn;t really know what to do about it.

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Post by Smeagol » Sat Feb 03, 2007 1:07 pm

Hi

That's really hard, when you're hanging on and hanging on for something and it's really big and suddenly it gets delayed and there's nothing you can do.

It sounds to me like you have a pretty good handle on the kind of things that would help you. The only comment I really had was when you said to "ignore your feelings". I just wanted to say that I hoped you meant that that was only until you got home. Some times just aren't good times for handling feelings, unfortunately, and sometimes the only thing you can do is put feelings on hold. But you are in a difficult situation and it's okay to be upset, and when you get home to cry and punch your pillow and ring up your t.
Act in such a way as to make yourself feel capable and effective

The change starts now.

If in doubt, don't

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