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tools to help you assess your urges before you give in to them, and to help you understand and learn from slips after they happen. by posting here, you're saying that you are serious about exploring the feelings behind your self-harm in depth, whether you're ready to stop hurting yourself or not. to request posting access, click usergroups above and join before and after.

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carrieuk
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Post by carrieuk » Sat Dec 30, 2006 8:21 pm

voices and external thoughts telling me to si


* how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?

the voices will stop and leave me alone.

* what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?

it will stop the voices, stop them gaining in pressure and volume and stop them moving onto su discussions

* how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?

it will help short term but am not happy with scars i am getting

* if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?

a day or 2

* what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?

distract. but it is really difficult to ignore the voices

* how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?

it has no effect on me in that sense

* what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?

i dont want to si but i dont want to get to su thoughts an voices either.

urges aren't necessarily the enemy. they happen for reasons, and they're an expression of a desire to stay alive and stay sane and keep coping. remember that.

More Before Questions To Answer


* Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
voices building up telling me to do it, showing me images. also starting to feel physical hallucinations of si

* Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?

yes. sometimes i can resist but sometimes it doesnt go away

* What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?

keepin myself distracted.

* How do I feel right now?
very tired. i dont have the energy to do much distraction and concnetration is bad so cant stay on pc long.

* How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
relief, quiet when voices go. pressure in head eases

* How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?

it has no effect on me. ie i dont feel any regret and am not even bothered at awhats happened. sometimes it feels like its someone else si me so i have little ownership of it.

* Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?

cant avoid voices as i have no control over them. current meds arent working and doctor is trying new ones so will be a while before they start working.

* Do I need to hurt myself?

right now i do.


life is not meant to be easy otherwise it wouldnt be worth living.<br>
judge the person not the illness<br><br>
Id rather be hated for who i am than loved for something im not.

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Smeagol
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Post by Smeagol » Sun Dec 31, 2006 12:22 am

Hi

I don't really know what to say. I'm sorry the voices are telling you to hurt yourself. :(

I'm sorry if this is a stupid question - I really don't know anything about hearing voices, but I figure it's worth a try. Can you try to drown them out by saying/writing down positive assertions? Like if they're telling you you're worthless, repeat over and over that you're not worthless, and start listing examples of why you're not. Or whatever they're saying to you, argue with it.

Take care

Gwylan
Act in such a way as to make yourself feel capable and effective

The change starts now.

If in doubt, don't

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carrieuk
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Post by carrieuk » Sun Dec 31, 2006 1:09 am

thanks for the tip il try it.

the voices get louder and more agressive if i try to ignore them or drown them out. pllus wen i have voices they so loud that i cant really cope with anymore noice on top.

but i will try

cx
life is not meant to be easy otherwise it wouldnt be worth living.<br>
judge the person not the illness<br><br>
Id rather be hated for who i am than loved for something im not.

<br clear="all">
<img src="http://www.toxin.org/cgi-bin/count_hugs.cgi?hug=carrie" height="40" width="240" title="HUGS">
<br clear="all">
*HUGS* TOTAL!
<a href="http://www.toxin.org/cgi-bin/hugs.cgi?& ... rrie">give carrie more *HUGS*</a>
<br><small><a href="http://www.toxin.org/cgi-bin/gethugs.cgi">Get hugs of your own</a></small><br clear="all">

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Smeagol
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Post by Smeagol » Sun Dec 31, 2006 1:28 am

Hi

Okay, this is probably a *really* stupid suggestion, but...

If the voices get louder when you ignore them or argue, do they get better when you acknowledge what they're saying? Using my "worthless" example from earlier, do they get better if you say "yes, I suck"? Would they get better if you did something else negative that wasn't as hurtful to you as self-injury, like deciding that you won't buy a dvd you wanted to get.

I wouldn't normally suggest agreeing with negative thoughts, but I guess anything that might make the voices stop...
Act in such a way as to make yourself feel capable and effective

The change starts now.

If in doubt, don't

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