Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
I'm stressing about a lot of things - things related to the job I've just left, the uncertainty of not yet having a start-date for my new job, anxiety about starting a new job in a new field. I'm also still not feeling 100% after being ill a few weeks ago and I'm angry at my housemate for something.
Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then? Yes. I talked to friends, wrote down what was bothering me, got angry... I felt better - calmer, less tense and anxious.
What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
I've talked to people, I've written down what's bothering me in place and in private. I've mentioned certain things to irl people, though not everything that's upsetting me. I've watched films and been shopping to try and take my mind off things. I could read a book, or failing that just try and sleep.
How do I feel right now?
Anxious, alone, down, angry, hurt, tired, disappointed. Like this can't be worth it just for the sake of not SIing.
How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
Pain. Relief.
How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
Disappointed, maybe guilty. Stupid, pathetic, inferior...
Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
Some elements of it are temporary. Others I hope will not be an issue in the future - there's no real reason to think they will be. Another... I'm not sure how to avoid. I could talk to the person involved and that might at least make me feel heard.
Do I need to hurt myself?
No. I can at least wait until tomorrow when I can call up about the new job and see if they have a start-date for me. I can also talk to my housemate about what's bothering me. Then I can think again based on what happens.
before
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- balletomane
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It sounds like a lot of things are just piling up. Is there anyway you can take some time to just pamper yourself or get some rest? Maybe if you give yourself some time to relax and recover a little more from being ill some of the stress will dissapate? Aside from that, I think the strategies you mentioned sound really good.
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