'emo'

Tori1989 · Post by **Tori1989** » Tue Oct 18, 2005 11:11 am

I started college a couple of months ago, and there are a lot of people there who like to call themselves 'emo'. Ive never really understood these kind of stereotypes because I think its pretty stupid to put yourself into a category. Anyway, one of my closest friends has started hanging out with a few of these people, and apparently its cool now to listen to depressing music and cut yourself. It sickens me how people are actually promoting self harm instead of trying to stop it! How are people who are actually depressed, and have a series problem with self harm ever going to find the courage to get help if they know they will be stereotyped as emo or an attention seeker? Am I the only one who thinks this? Does anyone else feel like these people are being selfish towards us self harmers who actually want to stop, and help other people stop too?

what_if · Post by **what_if** » Tue Oct 18, 2005 12:54 pm

I definitely agree. I cant imagine anyone in their right mind 'promoting' SI...that is something i've never been able to understand. Raising awareness is a great thing, but acting like its 'cool' to cut and harm yourself...

Just wanted to let you know i agree

~ Nat

pretty · Post by **pretty** » Tue Oct 18, 2005 5:44 pm

I dunno. If someone is si'ing to be cool, that's pretty messed up in itself. It's a pretty desperate thing to do to be accepted.

But I hear where you're coming from, definitely. Does it help to know it's always been this way? When I was at school ten years ago there were similar groups of people, and si was part of what made people belong to them.

Don't worry about anyone else though. You're all you can control, and it's really cool that you want to quit and can see that hurting yourself isn't a cool thing to do

Green Beauty · Post by **Green Beauty** » Tue Oct 18, 2005 5:57 pm

Heya i can understand what you are saying, it is definately wrong that people cut themselves to look cool. But i dont think it is fair to cast a stereotype over the 'emo' culture/group.

'Emo' does seem to be spreading very rapidly, across the uk at least. People do tend to say that i am an 'emo', my friends mainly. I don't dress the way they do, i like to wear my quiksilver and animal clothing it's just the fact i listen to that type of music.

Emo is called that simply because the music is emotional punk rock. All the lyrics are based around the artists feelings. You say the music is depressing well to some it may be, but for me the lyrics give me something to relate to. It has helped me.

Now i do SI, but i dont do it for attention only a few people know about it, close friends, i am always covered up and never talk of it.

I agree that these people who are cutting themselves as they think it is cool, are in the wrong and are putting a bad name on very difficult issues, but i think it is unfair that it is just one group that you blame for this.

You get those type of people anywhere. I also agree that stereotypes are annoying but 'emo's' are just a group of people into a certain type of music and lifestyle. They dont go around cutting themselves.

You get these annoying attention seekers everywhere.

Sorry i rambled.

Alex

BrokenGurl · Post by **BrokenGurl** » Tue Oct 18, 2005 6:10 pm

I get called "EMO" all the time..just cuz im sad a lot....which i think is crazy...i would moree call myself depressed but i guess its a new term for being sad..hmm.. i dunno

theboldeditalics · Post by **theboldeditalics** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 12:24 am

'emo' is short for emo-tional. so really, this isn't some sort of trend, it's just people who are more accepting of the way they feel and accepting that. at least, the emo's i know, which is a lot. they don't promote cutting, but most WILL talk about it freely, and i asked why one day. they told me that it's better than keeping it inside like all the rest of their feelings, and if they can't joke/talk about it then they don't have any real way of communication, since typically, cutters are INTENSLEY private, as they are.

sorry for that long explanation, but i always fight for the emo kids.

Small · Post by **Small** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 2:07 am

"Emo" is neither punk nor rock, nor a conglomeration of the two. The people who make emo music have no clue what punk is, nor what rock is. Emo music in fact reminds me a lot of the music of the 80's like soft cell, the sound as well as the look. Would people still dress in the emo style if we showed them pictures of the Human League, or Spandau Ballet?

Anyway, that rant out of the way, I know many people who are emo, and each one of them is a pretentious prick, and yes, they do think that cutting themselves is cool, but when they see the serious cuts on the arms of a friend of mine who has real problems, they blanche and tell him that he's sick. They are the kind of people that sit with the cuts on there arms in full view, holding their arms so that you see all the cuts. Now, I sometimes wear tops that show my arms, but I'm always holding myself in a way that makes the cuts less obvious.

That rant out of the way as well. Its possible that emo kids are different in different places, but the ones here give the impression that I have just described.

Small

Green Beauty · Post by **Green Beauty** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:10 pm

Small wrote:"Emo" is neither punk nor rock, nor a conglomeration of the two. The people who make emo music have no clue what punk is, nor what rock is. Emo music in fact reminds me a lot of the music of the 80's like soft cell, the sound as well as the look. Would people still dress in the emo style if we showed them pictures of the Human League, or Spandau Ballet?

Sorry Tori for taking the topic off course but just to say music genre's change overtime. Emo music is classed as emotional punk rock nowadays. Thats just what it is. They dont sound like punk music but thats just how it is. Like Green day are called a 'punk band' which i disagree with. The sex pistols, the clash, they are punk. But i suppose thats what punk is nowadays. Decent 'emo bands' are infuenced by punk and by rock music, they made their own style from this...

Anyways back on topic. Hope the 'emo' kids have been less annoying recently.

Twitter Mouse · Post by **Twitter Mouse** » Wed Oct 19, 2005 6:46 pm

I get called emo, I like emo music. Doesn't bother me

katja · Post by **katja** » Fri Oct 21, 2005 12:19 pm

an EMO tried to bond with me about self harming. He was like "did you used to slash your wrists when you were a kid? Don't worry everybody did it" I got SOOOOO mad that he was putting me in his category of just an emo teenage phase. NOT everybody has scars like mine, and he has no proof that he self harmed at all. This one time I saw a girl wearing fish net stockings with freash cuts on her legs that showed through, it was such an image thing it made me really sad. People can think what they want though, most people wouldnt understand self harm even if emo's wernt going around giving it a bad name (haha, as if it could have a good name, but you know what I mean)

kickingmyself · Post by **kickingmyself** » Fri Oct 21, 2005 8:44 pm

I feel the need to defend the EMOs! They're messed up too if they SH just to fit in, and I suspect some of them were probably doing it already. But let's hope it's just a phase and the EMOs won't be cool for much longer. In Tokyo, Japan, in the Harajuku district (fashion central) it was cool for a while to wear fake blood but that soon passed.

Skyeler · Post by **Skyeler** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 6:20 am

Small wrote:"Emo" is neither punk nor rock, nor a conglomeration of the two. The people who make emo music have no clue what punk is, nor what rock is. Emo music in fact reminds me a lot of the music of the 80's like soft cell, the sound as well as the look. Would people still dress in the emo style if we showed them pictures of the Human League, or Spandau Ballet?

Small

Now we could debate all day about what punk is, and what rock is and what punk rock is, it means a load of things to a load of people, emo can be a branch of punk, just a whussed out version of punk. Hell some rap artists are punk, punk is not only The Ramones puking in the subway fo New York anymore.

Anyways...

I think it's really unfair to just pin point an entire group of kids and say that they all cut for attention, just because someone dies his hair black, parts it to the side, wears a studded belt and happens to cut doesn't mean he does it for attention or for bonding.

Hell I get called emo all the fucking time too... and I don't sit in a corner and cry, or kiss my best friend because it's hot...

What pisses me off about emo kids are all those hot guys kissing webiste... me and my ex boyfriend ended up on a lot of those

Tori1989 · Post by **Tori1989** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 5:30 pm

Sorry to pin point one specific group of people, it's just what i've been told. Whether these people, whoever they are, cut because they think its cool or not, I still think they're being a little disrespectful. Surely if they really understood self harmers, they'd cover up their fresh cuts, and not use them as some kind of fashion accessory. Don't they realise that it can be very upsetting and triggering? How can they discuss it so openly? The thing that really bugs me is how they promote it. I was on a message board a while ago, and this one person was saying how they were feeling down, and asking whether anyone could reccommend some ways of helping them feel better. So many people replied encouraging him to start cutting! It made me feel so sick!

~*Star*~ · Post by **~*Star*~** » Sun Oct 23, 2005 12:12 am

I posted about this on my place thread a few weeks ago... it got to me too.

At my college, the new year 12s have started using 'emo kid'. Most people in my year had no idea what they were talking about- we were talking about new words in English Language- so the teacher decided we would discuss the definition of an 'emo kid'.
Basically, people came up with a person who listens to rock music, wears black and slits their wrists. The slitting the wrists part was very important in this description.

I didn't contribute... I was thinking about it. Surely, even if people are SI'ing to be cool, they must have some sort of problems to lead them to do that? If you feel the need to do this to fit in you're probably very desperate.

Surely if they really understood self harmers, they'd cover up their fresh cuts

I don't think people who SI really understand it all, and everyone is different. Some people on BUS don't cover up their injuries, its their own personal choice. Its not really a case of us and them, as there isn't one. Everyone who SI's is hurting in some way and we all deal with the after affects differently, whether its hiding what we do or being open.

Skyeler · Post by **Skyeler** » Sun Oct 23, 2005 4:23 am

Tori1989 wrote:Surely if they really understood self harmers, they'd cover up their fresh cuts, and not use them as some kind of fashion accessory. Don't they realise that it can be very upsetting and triggering?

The outside world is not created so that every single person can be safe all the time, it's ridiculous to think that every person stands in front of their mirrors in the morning and goes "now am I showing/wearing anything today that might potentially hurt or trigger someone"

No, because t hat's just not how life goes, if everything in this entire world had triggers on it... well it just be pathetic wouldn't it.

This goes back to the quesiton of SI'ers wanting to be treated like normal people, you can't expect to be treated normally if you expect everyone who has scars to walk on eggshells because they coudl potentially trigger someone.

theboldeditalics · Post by **theboldeditalics** » Sun Oct 23, 2005 8:14 am

This goes back to the quesiton of SI'ers wanting to be treated like normal people, you can't expect to be treated normally if you expect everyone who has scars to walk on eggshells because they coudl potentially trigger someone.

I totally agree. I'm sure as hell not going to wear long sleeves and pants the rest of my life just because it may potentially trigger someone. I mean, I am not parading around that I si, but not covering up fresh cuts is not a sign that they (the emo's) are unauthentic.

glass angel · Post by **glass angel** » Sun Oct 23, 2005 11:06 am

i think it all goes round in circles... (having been a 'goth' when goths were the subject of such discussions!)

do people cut themselves because they are into the emo scene? or are they into the emo scene because they are depressed? i'd favor the later explaination. i always wore black and listened to lacuna coil because i was miserable. partly it felt right, and partly i felt accepted by other 'goths' who felt and acted the same way.

or course there will be people who harm themselves to 'fit in', but as has been said, that's a sad thing in itself.

Arcadia · Post by **Arcadia** » Mon Oct 24, 2005 12:19 am

self harming for fashion reasons. shit i thought that was just a goth thing.
It always pisses me off in a subtle way when i see people with obvious cuts on their arms, mainly cos half the time they look like they've been done to match their lipstick.

oh well, one more reason for me to dislike emo kids. I just always thought they were fashionable, pretentious and self-obsessed, and really...well trendy. Mind you, every single rock club i go to nowadays, that used to be full of pretty cybergoths, metal kids and punks, is now full of ugly, whiny, emokids and goths, all lookign remarkably similar, wearing studded belts, black clothes, fashionable trainers and new rocks. It's only a matter of time before you get emo-goths, with platform boots and side swept fringes.

Naiia · Post by **Naiia** » Mon Oct 24, 2005 1:00 am

Hmmm...well, I DEFINITELY don't consider myself either goth or emo. But after I got depressed, I started cutting. And eventually, i started dressing in black...I think just because it was the one "acceptable" way to show people that I was hurting. Also, it was sort of like a defense--If you don't want to talk to someone who is not going to be fake, then beware, because I refuse to be. Another thing is that I didn't wear "Hot-topic" black...just nice, black clothing.

And I always used to cover up my cuts, but nowadays, I have so many that I'd have to be wearing long sleeves and jeans every day for the rest of my life if I didn't want some scars to show. And that's ridiculous, and I refuse to do that just to protect some people from seeing something that they don't want to. And if people can't accept it, fine, but this is who I am...and I AM trying to stop, and it's NOT something that I'm proud of, but I can at least accept that these scars are now part of me, and if you can't then, well, that's your problem.

Besides, I don't think you can be a college kid and be goth or emo. Something about it just seems quite contradictory to me. Anyway...I cut, and I happen to feel more comfortable wearing black when I'm depressed. But I don't do labels.

And anyone who cuts for attention needs help, and as someone earlier mentioned I think that probably the more common thing is that the depressed "cutters" hang out together because they can relate, not that "normal" kids get together and do it because it's "cool."

Skyeler · Post by **Skyeler** » Mon Oct 24, 2005 1:25 am

Arcadia wrote:self harming for fashion reasons. shit i thought that was just a goth thing.
It always pisses me off in a subtle way when i see people with obvious cuts on their arms, mainly cos half the time they look like they've been done to match their lipstick.

oh well, one more reason for me to dislike emo kids. I just always thought they were fashionable, pretentious and self-obsessed, and really...well trendy. Mind you, every single rock club i go to nowadays, that used to be full of pretty cybergoths, metal kids and punks, is now full of ugly, whiny, emokids and goths, all lookign remarkably similar, wearing studded belts, black clothes, fashionable trainers and new rocks. It's only a matter of time before you get emo-goths, with platform boots and side swept fringes.

well um.. yeah so much for not judging people uh?

for the record I would like to state that I wear studded belts, black clothes, fashionable trainers, have side swept dyed black hair. I am fashionable, pretentious and self obsessed...

does that give you any reason to be pissed off at me?
No

what's wrong with being trendy? Nothing, what's wrong with identifying with a music movement? Nothing.

AT least hardcore emo kids think rejection just gives them scenester points.

bus

'emo'

'emo'

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