Spare time activities? Any ideas?

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Semiramis
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Spare time activities? Any ideas?

Post by Semiramis » Tue Jun 21, 2005 9:23 pm

Hm, I don't know in which forum to post this, but I thought I'd leave it here...

I have the feeling that my life is so empty. The last few months I didn't have to work much for school, in fact I barely had to work at all. And this leaves me with sooo much time for myself. Which is great. But also scary. I've been watching a lot of TV lately, a lot more than I did before. Not just because of boredom, but because there are good things on (e.g. Desperate Housewives ).
My day: I come home from school, eat lunch, do a bit of school work, eat and eat and eat and eat sweeks and chips and everything, in between I do come here, play the flute if I want to (I don't play well, and this upsets me), maybe read a bit, and always eat, eat, eat, and then in the evening I watch TV and eat again. Wow. :x
And everyday I am so angry with myself because I am wasting so much time. The ED and SI and all the negative thoughts consume a lot of my mind space - but they don't seem to consume my time anymore. Everyday I am angry with myself :evil: because I don't do something useful. I should do sports, I should play the flute more often, I could draw or paint something, read something,... but I never do any of these things. I don't know why, but somehow I don't really enjoy them (anymore).
Other people are in a football club, in a dancing club, they work after school and have a job, they take music lessons - I do none of that. It's sad to admit that I have no hobbies at all, nothing that I really want to do. And somehow this emptiness scares me.
I want to do sports (I just recently quit badminton due to the people, and because I felt so fat and clumsy there), but I am too bad at it, seriously, and too fat. to play in an ochestra, I am too bad too, it would be ridiculous.
Do you have any ideas for new hobbies? What are your hobbies?
Hm, and in the end of the day I beat myself up for not doing anything - maybe learning a new language in my free time since I want to be a translator one day. Or just anything.
But no matter what I do - whether I do anything useful or not - I will end up beating myself up and SIing. :(
Semiramis

:star: It was as if what I wanted to kill wasn't in that skin or the thin blue pulse that jumped under my thumb, but somewhere else, deeper, more secret, and a whole lot harder to get at. :star:

from The Bell Jar by Silvia Plath

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NobodyToYou
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Post by NobodyToYou » Tue Jun 21, 2005 11:04 pm

Learning a new language does sound like a good idea, and would be helpful for your future career.
Another option, if you want contact with people, is to volunteer somewhere. That opens up tons of options, but look for something that interests you that you could feel good about contributing to.
I was thinking that you might want to volunteer with children, cause I like them, but I don't know what you would enjoy doing. Would you want to teach children art or music type classes? Or play outside with them? That would help with physical activity too.
Or you could volunteer at a senior center...get as many stories from them as you can and write them all down. Make a book for them (and you) of interesting stories.
Or help teach someone else a language...even if you don't know one very well, they could teach you while you teach them? My Aunt tutors people in English, and they teach her bits of their languages...I think the one now is Korean.
I hope you find something you enjoy to fill your time with and give you a boost of confidence and purpose.

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claire
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Post by claire » Wed Jun 22, 2005 12:33 pm

one thing you could do is sign up for courses ... hehe that are so fun... its like a week or two and then its over and you can do that in pretty much ANYTHING like painting, music, languages pretty much all the things you mentioned.

i find doing an activity or hobby for a short period of time is better than committing to a club or something because initally i think i have this excitedness when i first start something, by starting lots of things and finishing quickly there is always excitedness ... if you follow my drift ...

anyways, good luck and for the record nothing should ever interupt Deserate Housewives!

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Claire

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Post by plantt » Wed Jun 22, 2005 5:57 pm

run... once you're somewhat comfortable with that then join a sport.
learn to knit or crochet or something & donate what you make to a nursing home or some charity.
volunteer for a couple hours a week.
etc.
But no matter what I do - whether I do anything useful or not - I will end up beating myself up and SIing.
what are you doing to change that?

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claire
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Post by claire » Thu Jun 23, 2005 1:43 pm

omgosh yes!
:oops:
learn to knit ... believe it or not, i learnt to knit today (how sad, i'm 17) , i have to knit a 25cm X 25cm square and then it gets sewn onto a massive blanket and sent to a shelter ... i am so proud, but i knit so tight that its going to take me AGES ... however, it is so relaxing and involes like no concentration ... really learn to knit ...

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Post by plantt » Fri Jun 24, 2005 12:18 am

*considers rambling on about crocheting... but decided that she'd rather hide under a table(in a good way though really) :oops:*
some things can be rather addictive.

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Koru
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Post by Koru » Mon Jun 27, 2005 4:33 pm

Hmm, I think all the suggestions so far are really good.
My hobbies are quite water based, (swimming and scuba diving) and I am not sure how comfortable you would be with that but if you like the water diving is an amazing experience and swimming is something you can do on your own or with a club, at your own place and is great for fitness.
For gentler recreation try going into an art and craft shop and looking at all the stuff they have and just seeing what inspires you or that you might like to have a go at. You can get eveything from kits to do glass engraving to lacemaking, modelling clay, fabric paints etc. You could make something for yourself or as a present.
I think volunteer work is a great idea too, I have done some and you can pick something that you enjoy and know that you are helping others too.
Language courses are a great idea and available all over the place now.
Good luck with finding something that you enjoy. I know it isn't easy to get started on something but if you can find something that you like it will be worth it.
Your post has just inspired me to finally contact the kickboxing club that I walk past every day and see if I can try that now most of my Uni stuff has stopped for the summer - thank you!
- Always look towards the sunshine and your shadows will fall behind you -

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Post by magebaby » Tue Jun 28, 2005 10:16 am

the volunteering idea is really good. i started volunteering about four months ago and i love it! it gives you something to do, but i also love that i'm doing something that helps people and i feel useful and appreaciated, so that helps me emotionally.

there are loads of different options, so you can work with people or animals or desk jobs...whatever you feel comfortable with and enjoy.

best of luck. take care.

mage
"If you hear a voice within you say 'you cannot paint,' then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced." -- Vincent Van Gogh

"Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?" --Nelson Mandela

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