Need help with self soothing

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Chessie
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Need help with self soothing

Post by Chessie » Thu Feb 24, 2005 5:01 am

Anyone have some ideas for self soothing. I tried to talk with my pdoc about it today, but we honestly didn't get anywhere. She basically told me to pull up happy memories. And I just need something so much more structured than that. That's too free for me...and a lot of my happy memories lead up to sad, upsetting, or bad memories...like I remember my sister teaching me to read...but my sister is really sick right now and worried about her. So then I'd just go off into being worried and upset myself again.

Any ideas????
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demidivine
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Post by demidivine » Thu Feb 24, 2005 10:12 am

i think it's a case of finding a happy, detached memory or thought. like, my one is a sunset, not the ones i saw when i was travelling, because that would make me sad, but one i saw on a walk once. my other happy thing is singing "A Town Called Malice" in my head over and over, because it's my happy-song. :roll:
sorry i dont have any more helpful ideas than what you've probably thought of...

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Tamrick
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Post by Tamrick » Thu Feb 24, 2005 8:31 pm

For me self soothing is not only about memories and what I think.

It is relaxing to think of a happy place and then imagine yourself in it and what you are doing. I did this for a while and my place changed over time til it was just a fantasy place where I could do whatever I want.

Other options for self soothing include:

Rub cream all over your body
Touch a whole bunch of things and just concentrate on how each one feels
Take a bubble bath
Spray a strong perfume in your room and soak up the smell
Snuggle under a comfy blanket with a teddy bear

Basically you try to use all your senses to calm yourself. You can do this with your imagination too, but it helps to start with real things.

Tamrick
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VowsOfSadness
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Post by VowsOfSadness » Thu Feb 24, 2005 9:34 pm

seth-sooth use five sense: (this is going to be long I hope you dont mind)

Vision Buy a beautiful flower, make one space in a room pretty; light a candle and watch the falme set a pretty place at the table using your best things for a meal, go to a museam and look at painting you feel are beautiful, sit in the lobby of a fancy or old hotel, look at nature on a walk, go out at night and look at the stars, walk in a pretty part of town, fix your nials or paint them to look nice, look at pictures in a book (or magazine if it is not triggering), go to a ballet or other dance performanceor watch one on TV

Hearing Listen to beautiful masterpeice or soothing songs or music, or to invigorating and exciting music. Pay attention to sounds of nature (birds, waves, rainfall, leaves rustling) sing to your favorite songs, Hum a soothing tune. Learn to play an instrument. If you have to call 800 or other help numbers to talk to someone hear a human voice, auctually listen to someone's voice.

Smell Use your favorite perfume, lotions or callogne, try them on at a store, spray fragrence in the air, put lemon oil on your furnature, put potpourri in a bowl in your room. Boil cinnamon, bake cookies, cake, bread. Smell some roses or flowers (even if you have to go to a store and smell them) Walk in a wooded area and smell the forest.

Taste Have a good meal; have a favorite soothing drink such as herbal tea or hot chocolate (NO ALCOHOL); treat yourself to dessert. Put whipped cream on your coffee or hot chocolate, sample flavors in an icecream store. Suck on a piece of peppermint candy chew your favorite gum. Buy a little bit of a special food you don't usually spend the money on, such as fresh squeezed orange juice. REALLY TASTE TEH FOOD YOU EAT, BUT EAT ONE THING MINDFULLY AND SAVOR IT.

Touch Take a bubble bath, put clean sheets on the dead. Pet your dog or cat. Have a massage soak your feet put creamy lotion on your body put a cold compress on your forehead, sink into a really comfortable chair in your home, or find one in a hotel lobby or a store, put on a silky blouse dress or scarf. Try on a fur lined gloves or coats in a department store brush your hair for a long time wash it make it soft HUG SOMEONE.

--sorry that was so long hope it helps
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Chessie
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Post by Chessie » Fri Feb 25, 2005 2:04 am

thanks everyone for your help. I'll try to talk to my pdoc more about these sort of ideas. You guys came up with more the type of things I wanted.

Take care,
Chessie
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