Enjoying life more

[real]

The following is a copy of a post I made in a thread about strategies to stop SIing. I thought that other people might find these useful too. All the best.




My ideas are not directly related to SI, but more about enjoying your life more, nourishing yourself, etc., so that you might not feel such a need to SI (I hope).

Create two lists, I'll call them ONE and TWO for simplification.

For ONE, write EVERYTHING you have EVER enjoyed (not just as an adult), found to be fun/adventurous/etc., or was uplifting for you, etc. Anything that you would like to do or experience again. Don't censor out anything (eg. thinking, "Oh, that's stupid, not important, ..." etc.). Write the small things too. Be specific, rather than vague things such as "My holiday last Christmas", "The hobby course", or "Learning art at school", etc. If you think of such a general thing, write it down then write sub-points to it, such as the things did you enjoyed about it, other relevant info such as the place, people, feelings, context, etc. Brainstorm & just write, write, write. I have written pages & pages.

When I heard about this idea, I thought of lots of things I had never done but would love to do, so I created these things into list TWO.

Go through ONE, circling, ticking or marking in some way the "positive" things you could do again (eg. in case you enjoyed something about SI). If there is some restriction to the things in ONE or TWO, such as money, education, lack of a particular person or something, or distance, what could you do to get the person/object into your life, or get the money, education, travel that distance, etc. Decide what are the most important to you, or would bring you the most pleasure/benefit, etc., & then focus on them.

Start introducing the things into your life. If this feels too much, start with one very small thing. When you are doing that first thing regularly, or more often, & feel more confident about all of this, think about the next thing you would like to introduce into your life. Take it gradually, don't have any expectations of yourself, don't use this exercise as a way to beat yourself up.

Keep the lists close to hand so that you can read them if/when you are feeling down or feel like SIing, etc. Add to the lists whenever you think of other things. Introduce more & more of the things into your life. Also, make plans to achieve the bigger or more long term things.

Similarly, I found it extremely enjoyable to read & post in the thread, "What makes you happy?" I think it was in the main forum. I encourage you to look it up, read what people said, & think about your own things that make you happy as part of the idea I said above.

Another idea I just remembered is to think about & write the following sorts of things:
"If I did not have financial problems, SI & related problems, was not restricted by A, B, C, D, X, Y & Z, etc., etc., who would I want to be, where would I want to be, how would I want to be, what would I want to be, who would I want to be with, what would I want to have, what things would I want to be doing in my life, etc., etc.?" Let your imagination really go with this, asking yourself these & similar questions....

And then do to your best to achieve/do those things. I find this & the above strategies very motivating.

All the best with fulfilling your journey.

[pretty]

I'm gonna print this out and put it in my emergency box I'm working on with all the other things I've got off here. These kinds of things work particullarly well, cos they take up time and distract you in the present whilst cheering you up as well, but they have a more long term positive influence also. Thanks Real

[Susa]

Real, I just printed out your post. This seems like a very worthwhile activity. Please keep after me, if I don't tell you I am actively working on it.

[splitimage]

Real,

Great idea. Thanks for posting this here.

--splitimage

[real]

Thanks Susa & Splitimage. I hope both of you & other people find it useful.

[Karuna33]

yeah, I amreading a book called triggers. the idea is to build a reservoir of positive feelings, so using memories or making them up. Then taking those good feelings and transfrring them to something you want to do but feel scared on not motivated to do. So it seems similar to your idea.

I am , of course, avoiding this like crazy. Why, I dunno, I guess it take effort for me to sit down and work on feeling good. but...here I go, off to sit

thanks for the thread, I will try to sheck back with "the list" or partial one anyway

[Just Pomegranates]

*bumping*

Read the vast coping list and this caught my eye, so i thought I'd try it or at least have a think about it anyway.