How do you know when you are done?

[tuliptorn]

I have not injured myself in a year. The urges are still very strong, but I have managed to fight the impulses off so far. I still fantasize about it sometimes. Maybe not everyday like before, but still I do. My T has told me that this time he thinks that I will stop for good. How do you know when you are absolutely done self injuring yourself?
How do you know when its gone for good, or is it ever?

[tuliptorn]

Sorry if I posted this in the wrong section.

[swirlish]

Hey, no worries about the section! Coping is kind of slow though, if you want more replies, you might want to consider posting on the main board? ("bodies under siege")

For your question, I think it depends on what you mean with "done" and "gone".

I haven't hurt myself for almost 11 years, but I wouldn't say "I'm done for good". If I think SI is a good idea in the future, I'm not going to forbid myself from choosing that option (I tried and it made things so much harder). I don't want to hurt myself, because I don't think it's healthy and I don't think it would do me any good, but I personally don't believe in saying "I can never do that again". It doesn't work for me.

Sometimes if I'm really overwhelmed, I can still get the "urge" to hurt myself, but these days it's just a flash, I almost don't have time to finish the thought before I remember that I really don't want to hurt myself, it wouldn't help and that I need to do x instead.

It's a really good question, though. What do you think?

Mia

[Ennah]

I believe (and I know some disagree) that you are never done with SI. It has been a good coping method in the past and it still could be a good method in the future.

I was without SI for about 12 to 13 years (didn't count the exact years, as I though I was done) and now its back in my life again stronger than ever.

Not wanting to depress you, but just enjoy the years that you are without SI. It could be that you wont ever again SI and it might be that you do in the future. I consider it like a lottery

[disastercake]

I also don't think you're ever completely rid of SI. I view it like an addiction, like alcoholics are forever in recovery. It's always lurking there, because it helped at one time when nothing else did, and even after many years of not SIing it's still one of the first things I think of when something upsetting happens. Being done acting them varies on a person to person basis, I didn't realize I was truly "done" until I hadn't done it for a few years and didn't think about it daily or even every other day.