coping with others' reactions to SH

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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duloxetine_queen
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coping with others' reactions to SH

Post by duloxetine_queen » Sun Aug 10, 2008 11:33 pm

hello all
can anyone offer any tips on helping a partner cope with your SH? my boyfriend and i have been together 5 years and it continues to be a big issue between us. i'm very accepting of my SH and don't want to stop but every time i do it he says it must mean he doesn't make me happy etc etc. i don't expect him to *like* it but would like more acceptance and less telling off.
anyone else any tips on how to support others to handle your SH?
thanks
* to be free like the wind *

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shammy
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Post by shammy » Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:17 pm

When he reacts negatively to your SH, could you sit down with him and explain to him how it makes you feel? Explaining that him "telling you off" only makes the situation worse might bring to light some of the emotions that you are feeling at that time and it might help him to relate to what is going on. As the loved one of a person who SIs--its difficult to understand at times and we only want to love and protect you. You may have to remind your BF over and over again that your SH has nothing to do with how happy he does or does not make you. HTH

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kiwi33
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Post by kiwi33 » Wed Aug 13, 2008 1:22 am

This link might be useful.

http://www.buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=68015

It is from the F&F sticky threads and describes the thoughts and feelings of somebody who is trying to come to terms with the fact that his gf SIs.

Maybe you could print it out and give it to your bf to read?

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