will I be able to stay away from SI for 1 month?

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

Moderators: Spidey, noldo

Post Reply
User avatar
indigo_sister
settling in
settling in
Posts: 108
Joined: Sun Apr 20, 2003 5:55 am

will I be able to stay away from SI for 1 month?

Post by indigo_sister » Tue Jan 29, 2008 11:53 pm

I know it is silly to ask you this question as only I know the answer...
damn, even I don't know it, to be honest.

I just wanted to get some reassurance from someboy.
as I don't believe in myself anymore.

I have never been able to stay free for more than 1 week.
I hate myself sometimes so much for not being able to stay away from SI.
Yet I do it.

I know that hating myself certainly doesn't help my condition, but I guess I just don't know how to love myself.

So I have some work ahead of me.
If I can make month I can regain belief in myself.

Or maybe a month is just too impressive target and I should opt for somthing less
like 1 week, 2 weeks?

what do you think?

thanks.

User avatar
caged bird
board admin emeritus
board admin emeritus
Posts: 22909
Joined: Mon Jul 15, 2002 2:51 pm
Location: UK Age 24
Contact:

Post by caged bird » Wed Jan 30, 2008 12:01 am

i think the best thing you can do is try and see how long you can go for, a month is a great target, but keep on your mind that it's also hard. ot#'s achievable, but if you don't mae it, try not to feel too bad about it nad just try again

xx
visit my website
My Place

Being almost devastated is horrible because it lingers. But total devastation brings a kind of peace. It lets you give up.
Thieves and Kings: Volume Two by Mark Oakly

The line between normal and crazy seemed impossibly thin. A person would have to be an expert tightrope walker in order not to fall.
Running with scissors - Augusten Burroughs

User avatar
Licentia Poetica
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 24935
Joined: Sat Jan 25, 2003 10:06 am
Gender: Female
Location: Australia
Contact:

Post by Licentia Poetica » Wed Jan 30, 2008 2:55 pm

Don't worry about the length of time. That's not important. It's about how many times you want to self harm and you don't. Make it to 20 of those :)

Besides - you're doing it backwards. Believe in it first and it will happen. If you don't believe you can do it until you've already done it then you'll never get there.

You can do it. I believe in you :redstar:
:redstar: the time to tell a person you care is now :redstar: the paper crane chain of hope :redstar:

Image

If we knew each other's secrets, what comforts we should find.
John Churton Collins

User avatar
Chaocontrol6
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 7168
Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 9:50 pm
Gender: Male
Location: England, Aged 21

Post by Chaocontrol6 » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:54 pm

I'm not going to say you're definitely going to make it, but it's what you said really, only you know the answer, however I have every faith in you making it :)

Perhaps so you don't focus too much on the target (and it's me basically re-wording what Licentia said btw which was genious) and worry about when you do feel the urges and working through those, and every time you do, CELEBRATE with something silly :)

I wish you the very best of luck :D You can do it :)

Jason :grnstar:
Just let time tell the story, and act accordingly. (Phrase by myself)
H.A.L.T!!! (Genius!!)
These feelings too, shall pass. (BUS phrase?)
Image
The power lives in me!(Place)

User avatar
disastercake
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 3342
Joined: Sun Oct 02, 2005 1:12 am
Gender: Female
Location: USA

Post by disastercake » Fri Feb 01, 2008 9:27 am

Just take it a day at a time, and one week at a time. You've made it a week before and that took strength and courage, try to get yourself to 2 weeks first, and maybe then a month. A week is an excellent start, and I believe you can do anything you set your mind to. Know that we're always here on bus to support you, and there are many other distractions and ways to cope. i wish you the best of luck, and it's great that you're setting goals and that's a great start even if you don't quite make it
:bfly: -Al :bfly:

"...And once you have tasted flight,
you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards,
for there you have been,
and there you long to return..."
- Leonardo da Vinci

My Place

User avatar
Spidey
board admin
board admin
Posts: 21326
Joined: Thu Jan 26, 2006 9:30 pm

Post by Spidey » Sat Feb 02, 2008 1:35 am

dude, you can do it.
there is, in the end, the letting go.
-marya hornbacher

spidey immer voran
(spidey ever onward)

:cowave:

User avatar
Roxi
knows the ropes
knows the ropes
Posts: 4530
Joined: Sat Sep 01, 2007 9:36 am
Gender: Female

Post by Roxi » Fri Feb 08, 2008 3:34 pm

Rather than anticipating what's going to happen over the next month, focus on today. I always say to myself "just for today I will not cut myself" - it's rather overwhelming to say I'm not going to cut for A month or in my case; forever. I've found it works pretty well - Haven't si'ed in over 95 days :)
Image


Image

We are the girls with anxiety disorders, filled appointment books, five-year plans. We take ourselves very, very seriously. We are the peacemakers, the do-gooders, the givers, the savers. We are on time, overly prepared, well read, and witty, intellectually curious, always moving… We drink coffee, a lot of it. We are on birth control, Prozac, and multivitamins… We are relentless, judgmental with ourselves, and forgiving to others. We are the daughters of the feminists who said, “You can be anything,” and we heard, “You have to be everything." - Courtney Martin.

User avatar
disastercake
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 3342
Joined: Sun Oct 02, 2005 1:12 am
Gender: Female
Location: USA

Post by disastercake » Fri Feb 08, 2008 11:06 pm

congrats Roxi! that's excellent and i agree with the one day at a time
:bfly: -Al :bfly:

"...And once you have tasted flight,
you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards,
for there you have been,
and there you long to return..."
- Leonardo da Vinci

My Place

User avatar
Roxi
knows the ropes
knows the ropes
Posts: 4530
Joined: Sat Sep 01, 2007 9:36 am
Gender: Female

Post by Roxi » Sat Feb 09, 2008 6:30 am

yay! thanks, disastercake :D
Image


Image

We are the girls with anxiety disorders, filled appointment books, five-year plans. We take ourselves very, very seriously. We are the peacemakers, the do-gooders, the givers, the savers. We are on time, overly prepared, well read, and witty, intellectually curious, always moving… We drink coffee, a lot of it. We are on birth control, Prozac, and multivitamins… We are relentless, judgmental with ourselves, and forgiving to others. We are the daughters of the feminists who said, “You can be anything,” and we heard, “You have to be everything." - Courtney Martin.

User avatar
kittyfever
driving instructor
driving instructor
Posts: 5546
Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2006 4:54 am
Location: In the corner

Post by kittyfever » Wed Feb 13, 2008 2:01 am

I think you can do it. Just take it slowly, remember Rome wasn't built in a day. I really do think the most important part of quitting, or at least stopping for a while is concentrating on the days you make it, and not the days you slip. Good luckies and have faith. :pinkheart::grnstar:

User avatar
Cuppy
sock rocker
sock rocker
Posts: 3865
Joined: Mon Feb 04, 2008 3:58 pm
Location: USA age: 41

Post by Cuppy » Wed Feb 13, 2008 7:43 pm

.....
Last edited by Cuppy on Mon Jun 09, 2008 11:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Image

User avatar
disastercake
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 3342
Joined: Sun Oct 02, 2005 1:12 am
Gender: Female
Location: USA

Post by disastercake » Fri Feb 15, 2008 5:59 am

Cuppy wrote:Maybe if you can make it, somebody else can make it, & maybe I can make it too
that's the spirit, it's always inspiring to see some success stories
:bfly: -Al :bfly:

"...And once you have tasted flight,
you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards,
for there you have been,
and there you long to return..."
- Leonardo da Vinci

My Place

User avatar
indigo_sister
settling in
settling in
Posts: 108
Joined: Sun Apr 20, 2003 5:55 am

Post by indigo_sister » Sat Feb 16, 2008 4:47 pm

So many thanks to everyone for such inspiring answers.
I especially like the approach - one day at a time.

I found that it helps. No matter what happens tommorow, today is what matters rather than trying to make a month (it just seems so long and impossible). If I can make it through this day, I'll wake up feeling stronger in the morning. And then I'll try no to SI again for 1 day. Of course, falling back is dissapionting.

Although I didn't make a month (I guess actually I was not that determined when I posted about it the firt time) and as Licentia Poetica said - you have to believe it first, I feel inspired.

That sounds so right. So I'm working on it.

And I truly believe - if I can, you can do it too.

When I'll reach one month I'll definitely let you know.

User avatar
Roxi
knows the ropes
knows the ropes
Posts: 4530
Joined: Sat Sep 01, 2007 9:36 am
Gender: Female

Post by Roxi » Sun Feb 17, 2008 7:18 am

:) :) :)
keep trying and well done for the positive attitude
good luck and have faith
:star: ROxi
Image


Image

We are the girls with anxiety disorders, filled appointment books, five-year plans. We take ourselves very, very seriously. We are the peacemakers, the do-gooders, the givers, the savers. We are on time, overly prepared, well read, and witty, intellectually curious, always moving… We drink coffee, a lot of it. We are on birth control, Prozac, and multivitamins… We are relentless, judgmental with ourselves, and forgiving to others. We are the daughters of the feminists who said, “You can be anything,” and we heard, “You have to be everything." - Courtney Martin.

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 16 guests