Things Left Unsaid - Version 3.0 *Language*

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Callisto
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Post by Callisto » Mon May 07, 2007 9:57 pm

D: I know you mean well, but i want this. i want to do it this way. i need to, to prove something to myself. and it really is for the best you'll see.

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Scatterbrain
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Post by Scatterbrain » Tue May 08, 2007 6:16 am

you have no idea how awkward i felt in our conversation. took you fucking long enough to get some names... last time i checked this wasnt something you take your sweet time trying to figure out... fuck that.

~Megan
"The impossible just takes a little longer."
- HCJ (1/9/25- 2/26/08 )

"That there, that's not me/I go where I please/I walk through walls/I float down the Liffey
I'm not here/This isn't happening"
- "How to Disappear Completely" Radiohead

Place: Want to live and breathe/I want to be part of the human race
PBH: Back to the basics

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PassingCloud
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Post by PassingCloud » Tue May 08, 2007 6:17 am

it's now starting to just piss me off.
i have a right to be pissed off.
you'Re not this sacred untouchable thing i have to adore any longer.
you make mistakes too. and they DO make me very pissed off. it's my right. and i am taking my rights back now. they're mine. my right. to. be. pissed. off.
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[I'm talking about my life.][I can't seem to get that through to you.]
[I'm not just talking about one person,][I'm talking about everybody.]
[I'm talking about form, I'm talking about content.][I'm talking about inter-relationships.]
[I'm talking about God, the Devil, Hell, Heaven!]
[Do you understand?]
[Finally?]
(one flew over the cuckoo's nest)

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5th section
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Post by 5th section » Tue May 08, 2007 12:08 pm

what do you mean you can't give me any advice? what the fuck do you think you're there for? Isn't this the one thing you're supposed to know about?
...then one day I realised that the people you see in waiting rooms and car parks and on trains are really far more interesting. That they all have whole novels inside them, a fabric of scar tissues, photos and memories. They are comedies and tragedies and - more often - both at the same time.
- Anna James (1984-2007)

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- my band (or more accurately, the band of which I am the bassist) some SI/SU triggers in lyrics...proceed with caution...

GOING STRAIGHT SINCE 1ST DECEMBER 2009

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styled_wrong
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Post by styled_wrong » Tue May 08, 2007 1:12 pm

i love u i hate the way things are with us i hate that right now i cant just swallow what little pride i have left and explain that u mean the world to me i hate that im not strong enough to be there for u when u clearly need me to be i hate that im jelous and i hate that u are hurting

i wish i could tell u i love u, i wish i could come and hold u and keep u safe, i wish u knew how i really felt

:1hug:
scars are tattoos with better stories
it's hard to answer the question whats wrong, when nothing is 'right'
Not all scars show. Not all wounds heal. Sometimes you cant always see the pain someone feels

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Post by PassingCloud » Tue May 08, 2007 3:32 pm

i won't wait for an email anymore. i'm done waiting.
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[I'm talking about my life.][I can't seem to get that through to you.]
[I'm not just talking about one person,][I'm talking about everybody.]
[I'm talking about form, I'm talking about content.][I'm talking about inter-relationships.]
[I'm talking about God, the Devil, Hell, Heaven!]
[Do you understand?]
[Finally?]
(one flew over the cuckoo's nest)

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Post by acdcrocker1909 » Wed May 09, 2007 3:43 am

J - You son of a bitch.. damnit.. you're such an asshole.. you think you know all this high and mighty shit.. and that you're so damned smart.. and when I finally do better on a test than you in pre-calc .. you get all fucking pissy on my ass.. you asshole.. its the little things that you do and say.. that piss me the hell of.. don't you understand.. i don't want you to criticize me, and judge me for what i do.. just because your sister did the same thing.. I am not your fucking sister.. so shut the fuck up... damnit.. i swear, the day that i turn around in my seat, and just punch you in the face.. is coming closer and closer.. most of the people in pre-calc are waiting for me to beat the shit out of you.. and you don't get it.. you keep at it.. just shut the fuck up..

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It does not do to dwell on dreams, and forget to live - APWBD.


Music is life.. we each have our own symphony.. and we control it for the most part.. sometimes instruments drop out.. and others join in.. but when the music fades and the symphony is done.. then we have created a beautiful, personal piece. - Me.

Less Traveled Roads <-- Everyone Welcome.

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Post by broken_wings_DPT » Wed May 09, 2007 5:00 am

I hate you stupid fucking doctor. Its your fault she died. Why did you let her die???

And god, universe "benovlant" force, or whatever WHY THE BLOODY HELL DO YOU TAKE BABIES FROM THEIR FAMILIES????? WHY??

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Post by silent_scream » Wed May 09, 2007 1:58 pm

SA






I - Never. The more I think about it the more I see the way you think you are manipulating me, and trying to make me feel crazy. It worked - I'm nuts. But at least I'm not you. Don't expect to meet her. Don't expect photos. Don't expect anything. You had a chance to say "yeah that happened, and I regret it and I was messed up too" but you didn't take it. You make me think I am nothing but a worthless piece of trash. You made me think I was only good for one thing. You led me along, and made me look like a fool.

S - I looked up to you for a long fucking time, and you took advantage of it. Fuck you. A Youth worker doesn't say he will wait til you are 18 to have sex with you. A Christian youth worker: well, that's what being a Christian youth worker is about, I am learning. You aren't anyones friend. You seem like such a caring man: and that's what I liked. That's what attracted me to you. Turned out you just wanted one thing, and since I wasn't good for that (By the way, asking me if I want you to be inside me whilst I was having a flashback - not a good idea) then you just ignored me. Seriously. Fuck you. I keep thinking about you because you represent why I don't trust Christians, you represent someone taking advantage of my brother's left overs, you represent something that I mistakingly put trust in and got screwed over. Sex addict? You were the worst screw I have EVER had. Remember that. On my 18th Birthday.


J - I'm sorry I treated you like that.

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styled_wrong
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Post by styled_wrong » Wed May 09, 2007 8:06 pm

im scared, i dont want to lose u but i know its inevitable why the fuck does everything have to be so hard why do people like u, people who i care about who i feel care about me just have to leave why oh why does that have to happen i hate myself for the fact that i cant do this personally i hate myself full stop and i hate that i put u in a an awkwar position in which u had to phone my doctor i hate it im so so sorry please forguve me :cry:
scars are tattoos with better stories
it's hard to answer the question whats wrong, when nothing is 'right'
Not all scars show. Not all wounds heal. Sometimes you cant always see the pain someone feels

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Post by teacher2B » Thu May 10, 2007 12:36 am

Why are you acting so nice now? You messed me up and now that you finally understand that I'm fucked up you're trying to make it all better. I guess I appreciate it. Or I should. I shouldn't be an ungrateful bitch, but damnit--you hit me 5 years ago and now you hug me and sing to me. I'm too old to be sung to!!!!! If you'd nurtured me when I needed it I woudn't need it now! Why am I the one that fucking needs medication and counseling and help and I'm weak and stupid. Why'd you have to go treat me that way....? And then tell me that it's all my fault.

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Post by steady hands » Thu May 10, 2007 4:56 am

I'm sorry I didn't give you the vicodin the first time. i'm sorry I lied to you about it. it's just. I don't know. I guess i'm afraid of being vulnerable, especially in front of you. I shouldn't have done it, it was a shit thing to do. I hope you can forgive me.





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PassingCloud
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Post by PassingCloud » Thu May 10, 2007 11:08 am

you know what's the hardest part. i still love you. say the right words and i'd be there within two days. i would.
that's the hardest thing. that'S why i want to delete my email right now. not be accessible to you ever again. i want to just disappear for you. so you cannot find me. so that i cannot hope and hope and hope and get nothing but disappointment from you.

here i am writing letters to you. you are my SISTER. you SAID so. why then do you have to treat me like this? does it really matter that we're not blood sisters. does it matter that we're not even slightly related. does it really matter that there'S a continent between us? what does it matter? it doesn't matter to me.

i DON'T want to lose you. i DON'T want life to come between us. i DON'T want these things.

i want to be your sister forever. with heart and soul. not just for a while.
i cannot accept this.
and yet i have to.

this is the situation i cannot change. i realize it now. i realize this.
and i hate this.
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[I'm talking about my life.][I can't seem to get that through to you.]
[I'm not just talking about one person,][I'm talking about everybody.]
[I'm talking about form, I'm talking about content.][I'm talking about inter-relationships.]
[I'm talking about God, the Devil, Hell, Heaven!]
[Do you understand?]
[Finally?]
(one flew over the cuckoo's nest)

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xx mimi xx
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Post by xx mimi xx » Thu May 10, 2007 12:36 pm

What the hell did I do? Are you pissed off at me for some reason?? I dont know what the hell I did to you. You walk right past me and you dont even say hi! I know Im not the most important person in the world but you could at least say hi to me. You go over and show everyone else pictures and whatnot, but do I even get a hi? NO! Why not!?! You said youd "always be there for me" but when Im in a 'mood' as you call them, you just leave me alone?? Some friend you are. I dont care how bad your weeks been...I dont care how much drama happened at your party...that doesnt matter..why cant you just say hi to me? Ask whats up? Care? You asked me if I was okay and I made no attempt to hide the fact that I wasnt, and you still believed that I was okay.

What did I do to all you?

x3 mimi
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Callisto
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Post by Callisto » Thu May 10, 2007 1:52 pm

help,please? i don't know how to cope properly right now

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Post by the edge of the world » Thu May 10, 2007 2:26 pm

(Do I want to feel better?)

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Callisto
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Post by Callisto » Thu May 10, 2007 4:03 pm

deleted--because i posted it when i was angry and venting, not because i meant it necessarily.
Last edited by Callisto on Thu May 10, 2007 4:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PassingCloud
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Post by PassingCloud » Thu May 10, 2007 4:15 pm

you know how unfair this is? you knwo how angry you are making me by writing what you did? do you know how unfair it is for all of us who care about you?

i am really really SORRY you went through hell. i know that it was awful. i KNOW that. i know it really. but you'Re NOT who you think you are. you are much stronger than that. i cannot believe you cannot see this.

i care about you so much. don'T do this. just ... don't.
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[I'm talking about my life.][I can't seem to get that through to you.]
[I'm not just talking about one person,][I'm talking about everybody.]
[I'm talking about form, I'm talking about content.][I'm talking about inter-relationships.]
[I'm talking about God, the Devil, Hell, Heaven!]
[Do you understand?]
[Finally?]
(one flew over the cuckoo's nest)

:redstar:
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Callisto
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Post by Callisto » Thu May 10, 2007 10:44 pm

I'm sorry.

sorry i let you down. sorry im not completely better yet.

im sorry if what i've done hurts you.

please forgive me.

pm's ok

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MusicalMorphine
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Post by MusicalMorphine » Fri May 11, 2007 7:40 am

Just be honest with me. I know you don't really care, you don't want to hang around with me, you don't care who I'm with, what I'm doing, if I'm even with anyone. If you did you'd call me over, be happy to see me after 2 fucking weeks. No, all you do is run after them. If you don't care fine, but don't lie to me, don't tell me that you'll be there for me when you obviously won't.

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