Things Left Unsaid *LA*

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Wild Sunlight
growing roots
growing roots
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Post by Wild Sunlight » Sun Apr 03, 2005 2:48 pm

Dad - Please, stop being such a grouch. It's like living with an army sergeant. I know you're going through a bad emotional patch right now and I do empthasise, I do, but please stop taking it out on the rest of us. Particularly John.
Hayley - I don't know what is up with you lately, but why have you been backing out of our socialness for so long? Every time I try to do something with you you're always busy with other friends, and we were supposed to have a close friendship ourselves. I remember the time I invited you to come to the fair, and you said you couldn't cos you had no money, so I went by myself and then I found you, with someone else. With plenty of money. That hurt, Hayley, that really wasn't funny. And the way you get along better with my brother more than me... I feel like I've drifted away from you.
Caz - I'm sorry for you. I don't know what the problem is, but I can see you hurting. And I'm always here if you need me. You're cool.
Mum - Jesus, leave me alone. Nag nag nag. I can handle my coursework all by myself thankyou, I don't need reminding of the thing that dogs my mind all day. Just go away.
Josh - I love you. Everytime I see you all I want is to wrap my arms around you and for you to do the same to me. I love you, I love you.

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there_is_hope
driving instructor
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Post by there_is_hope » Sun Apr 03, 2005 9:06 pm

natasha- i wish i could tell u how much u mean to me esp all that we went through last year and saved my life even though i still wish u hadn't i know there are many ppl in my life that are very thankfull that u told somebody what i was gonna do.
"Keep Moving Forward."- Meet the Robinsons

Si free since Sept 28/08

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Green Beauty
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Post by Green Beauty » Tue Apr 05, 2005 9:56 pm

Can you please just stop lying???? You say you have given up smoking for about 6 months now but you have not, i can smell it everytime you come back from 'the shops', stop trying to hide the fact. Its not that big a deal! I'm only pissed off as you always lie and hide the fact. Your a grown up adult for fuck sake! Act like one. Quit lying.

Fuck my life, its going nowhere, when will all the shit just stop!!! I can't take much more of it.

AND FOR EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO HAS VERBALLY ABUSED ME AND INSULTED ME. GO FUCK YOURSELF. LEAVE ME ALONE. I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU, I HAVE NEVER DONE ANYTHING TO YOU. SO WHY DO YOU HAVE THE CONSTANT NEED TO MAKE ME FEEL LIKE SHIT?! I KNOW I AM A FREAK. I KNOW THIS! YOU DONT HAVE TO REMIND ME CONSTANTLY, YOU DONT THINK I HATE MYSELF ENOUGH TO HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THIS CONSTANT SHIT MAKING ME FEEL WORTHLESS. YOU PEOPLE ARE PUSHING ME CLOSER TO THE EDGE EVERYDAY. SO FUCK THE HELL OFF.

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Omnia vincit amor
Member of the Welcome wagon
Shh be quiet, You might piss somebody off
Proud member and loyal spoon of OATS - Oldies Against Text Speak
Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam
Skipping and a jumping, In the misty morning fog with, Our hearts a thumpin' and you, My brown eyed girl

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neassa
orange smartie
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Post by neassa » Tue Apr 05, 2005 10:02 pm

I can't do this anymore. i can't take having to lie to you every day and pretend im ok when im not. and i hate when u act like its ok when u can see ive been crying, when u can see i need help and someone to lean on. u know somethings up so just fucking ask me what! i need you so much right now and i feel like if u keep ignoring me ur just gonna push me away and i can't be pushed away from u. ur too important to me so please just ask me whats wrong. i can't deal with this on my own and it wont go away by u ignoring it. please. i need ur help more tham i could ever say. i luv u sweetie so please help me.
<center>. . . JB - 1998-2009 - RIP . . .
:star::star::star:</center>

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Post by Guest » Wed Apr 06, 2005 2:17 am

I wish you'd make me tell you why I was crying.

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Catylyx
orange smartie
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Post by Catylyx » Wed Apr 06, 2005 5:05 am

Daniel: im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry....no matter how many times i say it i can never mean it enough....i'm sorry i can't tell you what i really want to, and i'm sorry i can't tell you that i want to die......and i'm sorry i hate myself so much, because i know it hurts you, and that hurts more than anything else... :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :oops:

Sam: i'm sorry i broke down over the phone like i did, i'm sorry you have to deal with me....and god i'm so sorry that i can't tell you that your one fear of me su'ing is something that i want more than anything right now.....

i'm getting worse.......and i don't know if i can be pulled back from this this time....... :cry: :oops: :cry: :oops:


--Sammy[/b]
<i>I am innocent and I have been set free
I no longer have chains around my feet
And no matter where I go or what they say
I am innocent</i> --Third Day
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** 1 YEAR**~~back on the wagon 6/19/06~~

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twistddreamr
sprouting branches
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Post by twistddreamr » Wed Apr 06, 2005 11:30 pm

J & M: i'm scared of what you think of me, that i'm a crazy person who you have to be nice to or i'll snap. i don't want you to be afraid to tell me what you think or if i'm going to far in telling you something. i want you to feel like you can ask me questions about my SI if you have something you're wondering about. i just can't take this silence about it. true, we talk when i really need it but not really about the topic itself. i hope that you knowing about my instability will make you not want to room with me next year and/or be my friend anymore. i don't want you to feel like you have to be there if you don't want to or if it freaks you out. honestly, i'd rather you tell me that you're too uncomfortable to deal with it than to pretend it's ok. opening up blew up in my face last time and i don't want it to happen again.





please accept me??? please?
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As I search for the resolution...

"we're all just a little bit fucked up." ~Rob Thomas

"you have to earn your heaven." ~ Pop RIP

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Dungeon_Lilly
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Post by Dungeon_Lilly » Thu Apr 07, 2005 10:58 pm

Didn't anyone ever tell you it's rude to stare
<center>

I'm all lost in the supermarket
I can no longer shop happily
I came in here for that special offer
A guaranteed personality

:tslug:

:dkpurpstar: :purpstar: :lpurpstar:

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nirvana
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Post by nirvana » Fri Apr 08, 2005 12:03 am

i'm someone else.
i'm someone new.
i'm someone stupid,
just like you.

fuck. fuck. fuck. i hate him. i hate both of them. and i feel alone and like i want to cry, and i wish i could. but the thought of it makes me sick. sick. sick. sick.
i thought i was a fool for no one, but baby i'm a fool for you.

[safe since february 2005.]

~bluehaze~
awe-inspiring
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Post by ~bluehaze~ » Fri Apr 08, 2005 12:23 am

please can you notice that im not okay?

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marylou
meeting the neighbors
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Post by marylou » Fri Apr 08, 2005 6:32 pm

Are you kidding me??!! You can't be serious!!!! yes, you have to be there. Yes, I'd be mad if you weren't there. Can't believe you even asked, like you need my permission for you to be a prat. Like I was ever going to say it was okay, did you honestly think you'd get that kind of response. yes, I love you and yes I realise you're on holiday, but you knew about this since SEPTEMBER! And now you're turning it around so I look like the bad person because I said you had to come. And she will be mad at me because I said you couldn't stay. And you'll be in a bad mood because you're with me and not her. STOP IT!

And I DO feel bad and I DO wish I could honestly say that it was fine for you not to be there, but you know it's not okay. I can't BELIEVE you even asked!!!
Please be there.
"You loosen my chains and just ask me to trust you. But it's so much easier this way, even though I know that I am bound."

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BrokenxAngelx
bus addict
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Post by BrokenxAngelx » Fri Apr 08, 2005 7:16 pm

I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything.
<center>xx...__the red light'sburningbright tonight...__xx</center>

<center>xx...__ways of devotion turn toobsessionopen your eyes...__xx</center>

<center>25/04/2006</center>

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Catylyx
orange smartie
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Post by Catylyx » Fri Apr 08, 2005 11:52 pm

i love you....i love you.....i love you..........do you know how fucking long it took me to finally be able to say that to you! to finally admit it to myself?! i fought myself so fucking hard to believe it.....so why do i hate myself for it now?......please, daniel....please tell me what's going on......please tell me what's going to happen...please let me know if i'm going to lose you...so i know wether or not i'm going to lose myself..........please.......
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

--Sammy
<i>I am innocent and I have been set free
I no longer have chains around my feet
And no matter where I go or what they say
I am innocent</i> --Third Day
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Image
** 1 YEAR**~~back on the wagon 6/19/06~~

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swanfaerie
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Post by swanfaerie » Sat Apr 09, 2005 8:49 am

why do you put su threats in your messenger name? i'm so frustrated! until tonight i didn't bother im'ing you for months cuz i was tired of seeing an ever changing list of potential su threats. but now you've put a time limit on when you need to do it by?

WTF ARE ALL THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE YOU ON THEIR LISTS SUPPOSED TO DO?

I FEEL MANIPULATED AND HELPLESS, AND I HATE THAT! if you want help, if you need to talk fine, but these threats month after month are getting old. i want you to get help but you won't do it. do you realize you're dragging other people down with you? people like me who care.

i don't know how much longer i can sit on the other end of my computer and watch this. i don't wanna delete you from my list, but what choice do i have? i have to protect myself too you know.

*sigh*

feeling su doesn't last. and placing it where it can be a trigger (or perhaps guilt-trip) to people on your messenger list is extremely immature. PLEASE GET HELP. :(
Don't do anything stupid.
It's hard to ignore a naked person.
You're a good boy too, Mommy


make your own snowflake!


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Dungeon_Lilly
driving instructor
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Post by Dungeon_Lilly » Sat Apr 09, 2005 6:45 pm

I hate you, I hate both of you so much.

Why do you have to ruin the things I enjoy then make out it's my fault
<center>

I'm all lost in the supermarket
I can no longer shop happily
I came in here for that special offer
A guaranteed personality

:tslug:

:dkpurpstar: :purpstar: :lpurpstar:

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nirvana
spiffy maximus
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Post by nirvana » Sun Apr 10, 2005 12:15 am

stupid. stupid. stupid. stupid. stupid.
i thought i was a fool for no one, but baby i'm a fool for you.

[safe since february 2005.]

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Skyeler
just plain inspiring
just plain inspiring
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Post by Skyeler » Mon Apr 11, 2005 4:47 am

Kate- so you're fucking depressed as are alot of people I'm not going to fucking walk around hidding everything because you can't fucking handle it. Go to hell. go fuck your boyfriend. stop fucking crying on my should er and thinking I'll love you because I should understand. I don't understand and I don't fucking care. go to hell. I'll fucking beat your boyfriend up again if you set him after me.

Maiia- I'm not okay, yo'ure the only person who sees it, who has concrete proof of what I'm doing. You see Ash three times a day TELL HIM ALREADY.

Ash- I love you more then everything, I need you, I need you to keep me alive


Most of the time I feel like I don't belong.
But I got my new favorite record today.
My favorites change every single day.
Except you,
You'll always be number one.
[/center]

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broken_annabelle
building community
building community
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Post by broken_annabelle » Mon Apr 11, 2005 7:59 am

Why did you do my work? The bags were supposed to go out Tuesday and I was supposed to be the one putting them out. So why the hell did you do it? That's just taking my work away from me. I need to work, I need money. And that is my job, not yours. If you do my work, it makes me feel useless, makes me wonder why I even bother going to work if there's nothing to do. I'm not like the people on staff who get paid for shifts, I get paid by how much time I spend there and if you take my work I can't stay as long!

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Koru
town councillor
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Post by Koru » Wed Apr 13, 2005 2:44 pm

Jon - Stop messing with my head, if you want to meet me, tell me and TURN UP, if you don't want to, tell me that. Stop texting me, letting me reply then ignoring it. Grow up. I can do without your crap on top of everything else in my life. I wish you cared about me but you don't.

Tom - I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I can't be the girlfriend that you deserve. I'm trying to get better, I'm sorry I'm attention seeking and manipulative. You are better off without me even if you don't believe it now.

Hugh - You deserve better than the way I treated you, I'm sorry.

Claire - I'm trying to be strong for you but secretly I'm scared too, I hope it all works out OK.

Dan - Stop saying you'll e-mail soo and then not. I take the hint, I'll stop contacting you if that's what you want, just have the guts to tell me straight - and stop being so fucking smug about your great relationship when you know mine is going to hell.
- Always look towards the sunshine and your shadows will fall behind you -

I_Love_Joe_R
one of us
one of us
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Joined: Fri Apr 08, 2005 3:49 am

Post by I_Love_Joe_R » Wed Apr 13, 2005 8:08 pm

Mom- I hate you so much. You're one of the main reasons why I cut. You make me feel so bad its pathetic.

Joe- I'm sorry. I love you and I'm sorry you don't like it that I cut. But I've tried/trying to stop...

Mom (again)- You don't know what I feel like so stop trying to contradict everything I say with something of your opinion. When I want to hear it, I'll fucking let you know.

Nick- You don't need to make me feel worse man.

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