Candys Coping Thread

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Oct 22, 2007 2:30 am

I am having a great evening with my boy-friend,we just wanted t.v.,and relax. I am doing alright and feeling so-so,just have cramps and I feel bloated from it. I have day treatment program tomorrow and I am looking forward to going. I have not done any SI today,and that is great. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I will be going to bed after my boy-friend leaves,cause I have to get up early for program. I will be just fine. I have been using my coping skills today,and it has helped me alot,which is great. I will be just fine. I will be back on the bus sometime tomorrow when I get home. taking care of myself :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Oct 22, 2007 4:24 am

After my boy-friend left,I ended up slipping with SI,and I know what triggered it,it was my mother's verbal abuse,and it just got to me that I kept it in side for soo long and did not talk to anyone about it,the only person that I did talk to was my boy-friend,but it was still bothering me so much. I feel terrible for slipping,but I also have to forgive myself. To remember tomorrow is a new day. I will be talking to my therapist about it tomorrow. I will keep myself safe and take care of myself. I love my mother,but not the way she treats me,she knows how I feel,but she does not listen,I need to make some changes for myself. I will be just fine. I will be back on tomorrow sometime after program. hanging in there :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Oct 22, 2007 1:05 pm

I had a good night sleep. I am getting ready to go to program and I am looking forward to going in,then I will talk to my therapist. I am going to have a great day. I still feel bad about slipping with SI last night,but I know that slips do happen. I am taking care of myself. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I will be back on when I get home :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Oct 22, 2007 8:11 pm

I had a great day at program,and I real good talk with my therapist,she told me to really exercise the next time I feel like doing SI,and that would be a great ideal,she helped me alot. I am writing in my journal and then I have a few things to do,then afterwards I will lay down till my boy-friend gets here. I am doing alright and I am hanging in there. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I am not sure what I will be doing later on,but I will find out when my boy-friend gets here. I am taking care of myself right now. I will be back on later :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Post by one out of none » Mon Oct 22, 2007 10:20 pm

Hi Candy, sorry things were tough with the si and all. Exercise is actually a great idea, I might borrow that one myself. I hope the rest of your day goes well, and you have a nice time with your boyfriend. Take care.

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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Oct 22, 2007 11:52 pm

Thanks for the nice messages. I already wrote in my journal and it helped me alot,then I took a nap,cause I was soo tired. My boy-friend and I are watching t.v.,and taking it easy. Tomorrow I have cleaning to do and then my nurse is coming over to do my medication,so I can sleep in tomorrow. I am hanging in there and taking it easy. I will be just fine. I know that I have been having a rough time,but I will get through it. Thanks again. I will be back on later :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Tue Oct 23, 2007 4:23 am

I had a good evening with my boy-friend,he just left to go home and get some sleep,and I will be going to bed real soon myself. I did not do any SI today,that is great. I have cleaning to do tomorrow,and then my nurse is coming over to do my medication,afterwards I am going to do things that are positive for me. I am hanging in there and taking care of myself. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I will be just fine. I will be back on the bus sometime tomorrow :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Tue Oct 23, 2007 3:56 pm

I had a great night sleep. I am almost done cleaning my apartment,and my nurse will be over later on sometime. I am doing alright,just feel so tired out,due to my period. After my nurse leaves I am going to do positive things for myself. I am feeling pretty good. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I am going to have a great day. I will be back on later on :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Post by plantt » Tue Oct 23, 2007 7:30 pm

have you & your therapist talked about ways of dealing with your mom?

:wavey:

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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Tue Oct 23, 2007 7:40 pm

:wavey: Thanks for the messges that you sent me. My therapist told me to walk away from my mother and do some form of exercises when I feel like doing SI,and they are both great ideals. I have been taking it easy today. I did not write in my journal today,but I will tomorrow. I am watching t.v.,and taking it easy.My boy-friend will be over later on. I just have bad cramps today. I am doing alright and feeling pretty good. I am looking forward to your letter. thanks. be back on later :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Tue Oct 23, 2007 9:40 pm

I am doing alright. I just had dinner and I am watching t.v. My mother was here and she started in on me,but I handle it pretty good,I went to another room,to cool off and get a hold of my emotions,and when I came out,she left,which was a big relef. I feel pretty good,just trying to relax. She can be sooo contolling and bossy,but I will be alright.That is why I came on the bus,cause it helps me alot. My boy-friend will be here in a little while and we are going to relax tonight. I have day treatment program tomorrow,and I am looking forward to going. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. NO SI so far,that is great. I will be just fine. taking care of myself. Be back on later :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Oct 24, 2007 3:00 am

I am having a good evening with my boy-friend,we are watching t.v.,and taking it easy.I am feeling pretty good so far,and I am doing alright. I have not done any SI tonight and that is great. I have day treatment program tomorrow and I am looking forward to going. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. My mother is calm down since she was here earlier,and she called me for once,I did not call her. I am hanging in there and taking care of myself. After my boy-friend goes home,I will be going to bed,cause I have to get up early. I will be back on the bus sometime tomorrow when I get home. Hanging in there. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Oct 24, 2007 4:44 am

My boy-friend just left and I will be going to bed real soon. I wrote in my journal tonight,and I am glad that I did,it helped me alot. Here are two of my coping skills so far that I use:
:star: Writing in my journal
:star: reading
I have been trying to think of other things that I can do that will help me,even when winter comes and I can not get out. If any one has any suggestions please let me know. I am doing alright and hanging in there. I will be just fine. I will be back on the bus sometime tomorrow. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Oct 24, 2007 12:45 pm

:wavey: I just wanted to say HI to everyone. I am getting ready for program,and I am doing good. I had a good night sleep .NO SI last night that is great. I will be just fine. I am going to have a nice day. I will be back on the bus when I get home :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Oct 24, 2007 7:56 pm

I had a great day at program. The groups helped me alot. I am going to relax and write in my journal,then I am going to watch t.v. My boy-friend will be over later on,we are going out for awhile not sure where,but I will find out when he gets here. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I am feeling better and my moods are more stable today,I always feel better after program. I am hanging in there and taking care of myself. I will be back on later. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Oct 24, 2007 11:43 pm

I wrote in my journal and it helped me alot. Then I took a nap,cause I was tired out. My boy-friend is here and we are going out for awhile,not sure what we are going to do, maybe go shopping. I am doing alright and feeling pretty good. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I am going to have a great night. I have day treatment program tomorrow,and I am looking forward to it. I am doing just fine. I will be back on the bus before I go to bed :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Thu Oct 25, 2007 4:54 am

I did nave a good time with my boy-friend,we went up to Eastern Hills Mall,and then my behavior started,I got very frustrated with myself,and I started to punch my head in the mall, I have pulled my hair before,and I never done this behavior before,and I hope this does not upset anyone,sorry if I do,I am very scared and confused about this behavior. I started to cry and he made me feel better,he has been very understanding and supportive to me. I do not know what is going on with me,and it does bother me. I am not sure if my therapist will be there tomorrow,cause I think she is taking the day off,not sure,but there is someone I can talk to. I am very upset with myself right now.He just left to go home and get some sleep,and I needed to come here and talk about this. I am trying to relax and take it easy,cause I will be going to bed real soon,cause I have to get up early to go to day treatment program. I will be ok. I am sorry if I bothered anyone with this. I am hanging in there and taking it easy. If I have a hard time sleeping I will be back on,if not I will be back on tomorrow after program. I am going to keep myself safe tonight. taking care of myself. Be back on tomorrow after program. thanks for listening :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Thu Oct 25, 2007 12:52 pm

I had a good night sleep,even though I am not happy with myself,for what happen yesterday,but I will be just fine. I am getting ready for day treatment program. I am hanging in there. I just wanted to let everyone know how that I am alright. I will be back on the bus when I get home :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Post by one out of none » Thu Oct 25, 2007 6:40 pm

Hi Candy, I'm sorry that you're having a rough time at the moment, and I hope that everything works out ok for you. Maybe you can find some answers when you talk to your T about everything. Sending you hugs. :1hug:

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Thu Oct 25, 2007 8:22 pm

Thanks for the nice messages. I would talk to my therapist,but she was not there today,and I have tomorrow off,and she will be there. I just have been crying :cry: ,cause I feel so terrible inside for my behavior and I am scared for the way it has been going. I did not have a good day at program,but I would feel better if I had talked to her. I am hanging in there and taking it easy. I feel so alone and ashamed cause of this behavior. Again thanks alot. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I am going to lay down and take it easy. My boy-friend will be over later on. I will be just fine :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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