Post
by eyeris » Thu Jun 17, 2004 9:04 pm
hey, I don't have an answer for you, but I just wanted to let you know I read, and that I get what you are going through. I ask the same question, I've tried lots of different things that don't really work. The one thing that crosses my mind sometimes is that I am betraying my therapist ( I told her I wouldn't) and it doesn't help this "fixing me" thing go any better. I actually couldn't stop myself a couple of nights ago, and afterwards I felt so guilty and I knew I had to tell my T. I went into a session, and she immediately said I looked tense (I was soooo nervous), so after a while, I got it out, and she was just sad (she empathized, there wasn't any pitying me, I hate that). It really helped to tell her b/c I was really exposing myself by telling/trusting her. So long story short, I might think twice next time the urge comes b/c of how hard it was to tell her, and not telling her isn't an option for me. I don't know if this helps at all, but take care.
-e
"Subvert the dominant paradigm."