Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
- Never Again
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
you actually managed to make things worse. you are not listening to me. you say you are. if so then you are not HEARING me. nobody is HEARING me. i'm talking and talking begging for help and nobody is hearing me. you just assume that i won't off myself? you are so fucking arrogant to think that you know what's going on in my head? you are not the person i thought you were. my heart is broken. and you were the last person that i ever thought would do that to me. you were the last person that i let myself trust, and it will never happen again.
I have love. I have love but I don't know where to put it.
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
I want to keep my job. I don't want to be homeless again, and I don't want to have to rely on food stamps, the food bank, and loans from friends just to get by. I have had such a hard time with the bureaucracy of the public medical insurance system, I don't want to have to go back on that program. I don't want to rely on my partner's disability payments and live alone with him in the wilderness. I want to be a successful adult, but in a lot of ways I feel and act just like a little kid.
- Stawberry_Lollipops
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
You fucking nurses can't even do your fucking jobs. This used to be a good hospital but I'm afraid it's just going downhill. And fast. You treat all us patients either like shit, have no clue what's going on or "pretend" to understand what we are going through. You're all full of bullshit half the time.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
“There is no use trying,” said Alice; “One can’t believe impossible things!”
“I dare say you haven’t had much practise,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day
Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” - Lewis Carroll
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
I am not in love with you. But you are in love with me, and I don't want to fuck you up even more considering the last three months of your life, and so I stay.
You are selfish. I tried to communicate to you how awful I feel right now and what is going on in my head but it allllways has to be about you. It's fucked. It is not about you, all the time.
You are selfish. I tried to communicate to you how awful I feel right now and what is going on in my head but it allllways has to be about you. It's fucked. It is not about you, all the time.
-marya hornbacher
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
B- I just wish I knew. I wouldn't be so upset if I just knew.
C- I love you. I know you want me to get help, but this is part of my therapy. Please don't stand in the way of it..and I'm sorry I rely on you so much.
Dad- I wish you could just trust me. I know we don't have the best history together, but you have such little faith in me. How are we ever supposed to reform our musical compositions when I know you don't trust me.
Moe- I would NEVER EVER think of trying to steal my your boyfriend. You are my blood, my sister! No matter what he said or did 10 years ago has any affect on me now, nor should it you.
Mom- I love you so dearly. Thank you for always being there for me. If not for you, I would have lost my mind long ago.
C- I love you. I know you want me to get help, but this is part of my therapy. Please don't stand in the way of it..and I'm sorry I rely on you so much.
Dad- I wish you could just trust me. I know we don't have the best history together, but you have such little faith in me. How are we ever supposed to reform our musical compositions when I know you don't trust me.
Moe- I would NEVER EVER think of trying to steal my your boyfriend. You are my blood, my sister! No matter what he said or did 10 years ago has any affect on me now, nor should it you.
Mom- I love you so dearly. Thank you for always being there for me. If not for you, I would have lost my mind long ago.
"Hinged to forgetfulness
like a door,
she slowly closed out of
sight,
and she was the woman I loved,
but too many times she slept like
a mechanical deer in my caresses,
and I ached in the metal silence
of her dreams."
-Richard Brautigan
like a door,
she slowly closed out of
sight,
and she was the woman I loved,
but too many times she slept like
a mechanical deer in my caresses,
and I ached in the metal silence
of her dreams."
-Richard Brautigan
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
I know you both probably tried to do your best, but unfortunately it seems that it wasn't enough. I'm now carrying the effects of things that went wrong or things that you couldn't do properly. Having children is a big responsibility and sometimes I feel that it would have been better, if you two would have skipped of giving me a life.
Dad, I wish you would have supported my mother more when I was born. Perhaps it would have saved your marriage and my mother from alcoholism?
Mother, I wish you would be still here. I feel that we were just starting to reconnect, when you decided to end your life.
Dad, I wish you would have supported my mother more when I was born. Perhaps it would have saved your marriage and my mother from alcoholism?
Mother, I wish you would be still here. I feel that we were just starting to reconnect, when you decided to end your life.
- Rocks and stones can't bruise my soul, but tears will leave a stain -
- Stawberry_Lollipops
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
I can't keep doing this. I've had enough of these stupid nurses. All these stupid doctors. All these stupid people who are supposed to
"help" you. They sure aren't getting anywhere because they're useless. The nurses don't really care, it's just a job to them.
I don't matter to them. I don't know why I tricked myself into thinking that I would matter to them. Why would I matter to anyone anymore?
There are people here with such bigger problems and I act like the most depressed person in this world. I don't deserve this bed in this god damn hospital and I don't deserve to be here anymore.
"help" you. They sure aren't getting anywhere because they're useless. The nurses don't really care, it's just a job to them.
I don't matter to them. I don't know why I tricked myself into thinking that I would matter to them. Why would I matter to anyone anymore?
There are people here with such bigger problems and I act like the most depressed person in this world. I don't deserve this bed in this god damn hospital and I don't deserve to be here anymore.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
“There is no use trying,” said Alice; “One can’t believe impossible things!”
“I dare say you haven’t had much practise,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day
Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” - Lewis Carroll
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
NOT
EVERY
SINGLE
FUCKING
THING
I
SAY
IS
ABOUT
YOU
YOU
SELFISH
ASSHOLE\
And after the day I have had you can go fuck yourself.
EVERY
SINGLE
FUCKING
THING
I
SAY
IS
ABOUT
YOU
YOU
SELFISH
ASSHOLE\
And after the day I have had you can go fuck yourself.
-marya hornbacher
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
JUST FUCK OFF
JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP AND FUCK OFF AND NEVER SAY THAT AGAIN
JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP AND FUCK OFF AND NEVER SAY THAT AGAIN
~Capri
xoxo
"Awake and unafraid."
My Chemical Romance
"I am haunted by humans."
The Book Thief
"Been trying hard not to get into trouble, but I've got a war in my mind."
Lana Del Rey
"It's always darkest just before the dawn. So stay awake with me. Let's prove them wrong."
Rise Against
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Dune
xoxo
"Awake and unafraid."
My Chemical Romance
"I am haunted by humans."
The Book Thief
"Been trying hard not to get into trouble, but I've got a war in my mind."
Lana Del Rey
"It's always darkest just before the dawn. So stay awake with me. Let's prove them wrong."
Rise Against
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Dune
- WalkingStick
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
You're a shitty doctor. And now I'm scared to take xanax because I feel like I need to save it because how am I going to get more since you're such a shitty doctor. So now I've decided to cut instead of taking xanax because of this. Because of you.
So I'm at work and I have my supplies and I don't think I'm going to make it through the day without using them. Because I won't take the xanax I have in my purse.
Fuck you.
So I'm at work and I have my supplies and I don't think I'm going to make it through the day without using them. Because I won't take the xanax I have in my purse.
Fuck you.
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=100939
Christ be ever before me. Christ be ever behind me. Christ be ever within me.
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
I'm sorry.
-marya hornbacher
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
So hurt by what I found out today. A lot of anger just came rushing back
- Just Pomegranates
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
You are such a stingy bitch, it's fucking disgusting.
“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” - Dalai Lama XIV
“The shark that does not swim, drowns.” - Russian Proverb
“The shark that does not swim, drowns.” - Russian Proverb
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
fuck your car, i care about you. stop talking about your car, start talking about you
-marya hornbacher
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
stop projecting your shit onto me, stop having a go because you did fuck all yesterday and i'm left to do all the fucking orders because he doesn't care and you did fuck all yesterday. i don't need this shit. and then all you'll do is complain and say too much shit got ordered and look who the fucking blame will go to, me. i'm not doing it anymore, i'm not taking your shit. i think you're a really good mate outside of work but inside of work, i hate you. you're fucking mean to me cos you're pissed off and unhappy at him, we all are, but it's not my fucking problem. you always complain that stuff isn't sorted or organised but you're just the fucking same. i cannot be fucking arsed with this shit anymore. i'm not fucking taking it. you'll fucking realise when i go that i'm the only other person apart from you that actually fucking cares. i shouldn't but i do. i'm never late or sick, always fucking work my arse off and get no fucking recognition for it. and the fact that i got kicked off at cos of him being lazy is wrong. i'm overworked and pissed off.
- Akor
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
I won't forgive myself, ever. I know I told you I did / would, but i don't think I'll ever let it go. I know its eating me alive living each day like this, but I'm just fucking stuck here and always will be cause I deserve every minute of it.
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- Just Pomegranates
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
I don't want to be here at all
(talking about home with my family)
(talking about home with my family)
“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” - Dalai Lama XIV
“The shark that does not swim, drowns.” - Russian Proverb
“The shark that does not swim, drowns.” - Russian Proverb
- WalkingStick
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
I'm trying.
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=100939
Christ be ever before me. Christ be ever behind me. Christ be ever within me.
- Akor
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA* v. 6
I need help, just someone to talk with. Instead I'll go to bed
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