do your parents know

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

Moderators: Spidey, noldo

do your parents know about you SI??

Yes , by accident
53
43%
No, i hope they never do
53
43%
No,but i want to tell them
2
2%
Yes I told them
14
11%
 
Total votes: 122

User avatar
capricorn
awe-inspiring
awe-inspiring
Posts: 6410
Joined: Sun Jan 03, 2010 10:21 pm
Gender: Female
Location: London, UK
Contact:

Re: do your parents know

Post by capricorn » Tue Sep 21, 2010 6:17 pm

There was this one time when I was like, eight or something, when I SH-d and my mother saw [and my aunt and my grandma] but they don't know that I used to cut.
Pretty much the whole world knows I have a tendency to beat my head against walls or whatever's handy, but most don't connect it with SH or mental illness or whatever, I think they just see it as me being weird. I used to do it when I was a baby. So yeah.
I Hope they never do, I can't see that they'd have any kind of a sympathetic or helpful reaction. When I was about twelve my mother told me about people who go to hospital after SH-ing, that she thinks they're pathetic and attention-seeking and shouldn't recieve treatment for self-inflicted wounds. So erm, never gonna tell her. :roll:
~Capri
xoxo

"Awake and unafraid."
My Chemical Romance


"I am haunted by humans."
The Book Thief


"Been trying hard not to get into trouble, but I've got a war in my mind."
Lana Del Rey


"It's always darkest just before the dawn. So stay awake with me. Let's prove them wrong."
Rise Against

"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Dune

User avatar
Stormy Llwellyn
bus addict
bus addict
Posts: 2882
Joined: Sat Nov 14, 2009 11:45 pm
Location: At Physical Therapy most of the time.

Re: do your parents know

Post by Stormy Llwellyn » Wed Sep 22, 2010 1:18 am

I only told my dad recently. I have hid my si for a long long time. It wasn't exactly the response I was hoping for but I guess it was a shock, he had never heard of si before.
Mike's Place


God,grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and the Wisdom to know the difference


TWLOHA

:moo: Kaylee

User avatar
Stawberry_Lollipops
spiffy maximus
spiffy maximus
Posts: 4326
Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2009 6:39 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Australia

Re: do your parents know

Post by Stawberry_Lollipops » Sun Sep 26, 2010 2:49 pm

I told my mum, just over a year ago. Though not by will but out of necessity. We never talk about it. Ever. I only told my mother because I cut quite deep and feared I needed medical attention, she freaked out, took care of the injury for me and after about a week, it never got bought up again. I think she only thought it was something I did once or twice and thinks I'm fine now. I have stopped because I promised her I would after that but SI is still a very large part of my life, in the way of fighting urges/thinking about it.
~ My Place ~


"Rejoice in our suffering, suffering produces perserverance, perserverance - character and character hope"

* ~ * ~ * ~ *


“There is no use trying,” said Alice; “One can’t believe impossible things!”
“I dare say you haven’t had much practise,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day
Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” - Lewis Carroll


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to the difference.

User avatar
PokemonGeek
town councillor
town councillor
Posts: 1536
Joined: Sat Jun 13, 2009 6:33 pm
Gender: Male
Location: latrobe pa

Re: do your parents know

Post by PokemonGeek » Sun Sep 26, 2010 3:32 pm

Not quite accidentally but I didn't tell my guardian or family what I was doing to myself. They found out from professionals when I had a crisis. They were supportive of me afterwards even though they found out about my problem in a way they didn't want to.
I will survive
Oh as long as I know how to love
I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live,
I've got all my love to give, and I'll survive
I will survive
~Gloria Gaynor

‎"Maybe you don't need the whole world to love you; maybe you just need one person"
-Kermit the Frog~The Muppets

"Don't pawn your garbage off on me!"~Watchy Watchog (Pokemon Black/White)

BUS Family:
s0_vERY_sCaReD

Somehow the wires uncrossed
The tables were turned
Never knew I had such a lesson to learn
I'm feeling good from my head to my shoes
I know where I'm going and I know what to do
I've tidied up my point of view
I've got a new attitude!
˜Patti LaBelle

User avatar
Roxi
knows the ropes
knows the ropes
Posts: 4530
Joined: Sat Sep 01, 2007 9:36 am
Gender: Female

Re: do your parents know

Post by Roxi » Sat Oct 02, 2010 6:50 am

I told my parents willingly when I was 16 . My therapist at the time had suggested it and at first I was horrified at the idea, but then realized that it would be better for them to know since I was trying to stop. It was difficult to tell them , but I don't regret it - I prefer not to have secrets.
Image


Image

We are the girls with anxiety disorders, filled appointment books, five-year plans. We take ourselves very, very seriously. We are the peacemakers, the do-gooders, the givers, the savers. We are on time, overly prepared, well read, and witty, intellectually curious, always moving… We drink coffee, a lot of it. We are on birth control, Prozac, and multivitamins… We are relentless, judgmental with ourselves, and forgiving to others. We are the daughters of the feminists who said, “You can be anything,” and we heard, “You have to be everything." - Courtney Martin.

User avatar
ambivalent red
growing roots
growing roots
Posts: 768
Joined: Wed Aug 20, 2008 7:58 pm
Location: buried deep inside of me

Re: do your parents know

Post by ambivalent red » Mon Dec 20, 2010 5:24 pm

it's hard to hide scars and new ones pop up often.
I just went to get a pedicure with my sister and there were big scars on my ankles she saw but did not say anything. it was akward.
There's no where to run
There's no where to hide
From what's in your mind - It's a Ghetto
-Supreme Beings Leisure

User avatar
TheRockingHorse
quintessential regular
quintessential regular
Posts: 2032
Joined: Sun May 06, 2007 7:28 pm

Re: do your parents know

Post by TheRockingHorse » Thu Jan 06, 2011 5:53 am

interestingly enough, i posted on this in 2007.... well, they found out by accident from a teacher a couple months after my post. and despite my indecision then, in the long run i'm glad they found out when they did.
I said to the sun, tell me about the Big Bang
The sun said, 'It hurts to become.'

Andrea Gibson

My Place
A living room wall with awkwardly placed photographs hiding fist-shaped holes

strider 151
bus mechanic
bus mechanic
Posts: 3422
Joined: Thu Jun 19, 2008 7:47 pm
Gender: female
Location: my mind
Contact:

Re: do your parents know

Post by strider 151 » Thu Jan 06, 2011 8:59 pm

i chose to tell dad, but not mum because i felt closer to dad and that dad could handle it and wouldnt crumble

well dad could handle it but he took it hard but it was expected. he cares about me so if he didnt take it hard it wouldnt make sense

telling him helped me stop because he made me think about what i was doing, gave me more motivation to stop, i didnt wanna hurt him and that helped take some of the uges off, and idk his support made all the difference :) :lgrnstar:
PBH, Telling my parents, My place - All welcome [hugs, stars, challenges, questions are all ok :gooddeal: :Fade-color

In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.


:pangel: [Working Towards Recovery] :pangel:
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*

Elfgirl
sprouting branches
sprouting branches
Posts: 1240
Joined: Sun Dec 19, 2004 7:31 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Netherlands
Contact:

Re: do your parents know

Post by Elfgirl » Thu Jan 06, 2011 10:11 pm

My parents found out by accident, one day when I'd SI'd at school and a teacher had seen the marks and told my father. They were quite angry and called me names over it. They never said I should go to counseling except as a threat - they never wnated me to go to counseling. This was in late 2003 when I was 17.

User avatar
flawedinsomniac
unpacking boxes
unpacking boxes
Posts: 31
Joined: Wed Aug 27, 2008 8:31 am
Gender: Female
Location: North Dakota
Contact:

Re: do your parents know

Post by flawedinsomniac » Fri Jan 07, 2011 4:14 am

I started to SI when I was 12.5, and they had it figured out by the time I was 13.5 or so. I quit from age 14 to age 16.5, but then I started up again and was a lot more discreet about it. For some reason I felt compelled to tell my mother about it. I guess I was 17.5 or so at that point. I'm 19.5 now.
A happy life consists in tranquility of mind -- Cicero

becky-marie
creating your space
creating your space
Posts: 150
Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 2:04 pm

Re: do your parents know

Post by becky-marie » Thu Jan 20, 2011 2:38 pm

my parents found out accidentally... my mother got mad and my dad just walked away. we talked about (sort of) twice and then pretended it didn't exist. They think i haven't hurt myself in almost two years. They only saw healed scars on my arms, so nowhere near the worst of it.

User avatar
a7xcncangel
bus conductor
bus conductor
Posts: 5045
Joined: Fri Jan 02, 2009 9:30 pm
Gender: male
Location: Michigan

Re: do your parents know

Post by a7xcncangel » Tue Mar 01, 2011 2:14 am

Mine found my box of tools and med supplies under my bed in September 2007, flipped a shit, and then sent me right to counseling...
Mum: ReineDuSommeil
Sister: waydownsouth, nomad2207, noldo
Brother: sirjnj
Daughter: Azira
Cousin: DuchessN, jadestarwalking
Aunt: Cheycatsgarden

User avatar
mande
forum moderator - life after & place
forum moderator - life after & place
Posts: 4037
Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2009 3:37 am
Gender: female
Location: New York City
Contact:

do your parents know

Post by mande » Tue Mar 01, 2011 1:31 pm

My parents found out 2 years into my si addiction. (started at 11 told them at 13) I had some supportive friends who encouraged me to tell them. I finally showed them my arms and legs. My mother took me to the hospital and my father didn't speak to me for weeks.

My father eventually got over it and the hospital helped me get the outpatient care I needed. It was the right decision to tell them I was struggling.

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 30 guests