Things Left Unsaid *LA*

[amyfairy]

NO I'm not okay. I'm only okay when I am empty and losing weight. I cannot deal with this I cannot deal with this I cannot deal with this. I have turned into a monster. I may never get back my control. I am not okay. This cannot be. I can't have this. I would rather die I can't stand to be in this skin and in this head and in this body. I am trapped. I want a way out.

[Annybelly]

^ if okay ^

fuck off.. you cant lecture me and then go and be all hypocritical. sort your own out 1st. and sort out ur damn family as well..

what sort of family has crap like that that they hide??

[styled_wrong]

>>deleted<<

[Helba]

S - I asked you out three years ago ecause yes I did have feelings for you. But you left and that was okay and it still is but don't tell me after all these years you should have said yes when I moved on. I am sorry S but my heart is to another even if I can't be with her I still love her.

M- thanks for being such a great friend. Somedays I feel like your my best friend. I've never had a friend like you before.

[Beasty]

I miss you.

[Stefani140]

J - shut up with your self righteous bullshit, I'm so pissed off with you that flames are about to shoot out my eyes.


S - I needed you to be supportive and there for me today, and you managed to make me feel worse. Just go away so I can cry and make myself feel better since you are incapable of just being kind today.

[5th section]

my love,

how is everything? I hope you're happy. I hope things are going well - perfectly - for you.

they played act 2 of Tristan tonight. haha, you know what I'm like. I'm sure you can imagine. I hope you don't mind that I mentioned that. I was thinking of you all the way through.

I don't mind admitting that I'm a bit nervous about meeting you, whenever that is. After everything that's happened...you know what I mean, I hope. I'm not sure I trust myself not to do or say anything stupid. You won't mind if I do, will you? You won't hold it against me? just as you didn't when I told you the other thing I should never have told anyone? I suppose I'm saying this because I know you seem to be able to look kindly on people whatever they've done, and I want you to know that I don't take it for granted.

It's quite funny, there was a girl on the trip who had the same name as you. I think my heart missed a beat (sentimentalist that I am!) whenever I had to call the register.

I'm rambling. sorry. I expect you're used to it (especially after all those Sorcerer rehearsals!)

I love you

Dan

[steady hands]

okay, I know it is hard for you to accept things that are different from you or what you know, or that scare you, or that you feel threaten you or what you believe.

but you need to get over all of this.

you need to get over the fact that I don't shave.
you need to get over the fact that I am not straight.
you need to get over the fact that I don't believe the same things you do.
you need to get over the fact that I am not going to be the person that you want me to be.

I am tired of your arrogance and your intolerance. I am tired of your attitude and your assumptions and that you are convinced you're always right.
I am tired of pretending not to be involved in your conversations or that I believe the same thing you do when you are attacking who I am and what I believe.
I REFUSE to let you continue to put me down and act like what I am is wrong.
I will no longer be your joke or your scapegoat.
None of this changes the way I feel for you.
None of this changes who I am. I have always been the same person.
I still love you, but I will not let you do this to me.
Hopefully you will understand this.

[Stefani140]

You never want to talk about these things, and when you actually do you just argue with me about it. So fine, forget I ever mentioned it and we won't talk about it....but don't be shocked when I don't feel like talking about all your stupid shit later.

You refuse to be supportive of me, I can't be bothered to humor you.

[capricorn]

I'm so pathetic and disgusting. And I just want things to be perfect for now.
Ack.

[Annybelly]

leave me alone. i dont want to spend time with you. imma happy [okay, happyish, okyish] right now. i dont want 2 go and play crappy games with you. fuck off .

[searching_for_solace]

To a friend: I know you're trying to be helpful but you and I just do NOT agree on the origins of the voices. Your insistence that they're "not good" even "evil" is hurting our feelings, but i'm not brave enough to tell you this.

Dear stranger at the bookstore: Your credibility is directly proportional to your hygiene. If you want people to talk to you maybe you should shower and wash your clothes. You REEK. I wanted to gag.

[leafy]

T I love you very much and all I want for you is to be happy. I am so sorry that I can't show you that because I feel so bad. You are leaving again and I am so afraid that you don't think that I will miss you. I'm so afraid that you will think that I am relieved that you're gone. If I could make life easier for you I would. I'm so sorry if I have added unto you burden. I wish I could answer any negative thought in your mind and replace it with something positive. I love you, please be happy.

M & D I am so frustrated that you never solve anything. I'm so frustrated that we can't talk. I am so sad that you don't care enough. Now it's too late, I've hoped for so long but I've lost hope that this could be possible. I can't even talk to you anymore. I talk but I'm not there. You have no idea how much you don't know me. And you don't seem to notice. And now I wonder if you have ever cared. You will never understand me. Whenever you try to approach me with something, it's so far off..

[Butterfly.]

I've fallen for you And maybe even love you. Why can't I just fucking say it.

[stripysocks4christ]

im sick of all the fighting and crying whenever your around. cant you see that its tearing this family apart??? i love you dearly, but i hate you at the same time. im sick of it all and i cant wait till i can move out - move out away from you.

[Stefani140]

S- I feel so vastly insecure around you right now. Its even worse that your going to be here in a few days. And I'm really sorry but just telling me that I'm being silly doesn't help. I dunno what would help...probably nothing.

M - So I tell you that the reason I kept trying to call was because I was freaked out and wanted to know if someone would come stay with me for the night....and your response is to talk about something completely different. Way to be understanding!

[Annybelly]

B- as much as i love you, i dont want to spend every waking moment with you- give me some space. please.
i'll hav seen u 11 days in a row.. ur planning more. like, i like you, i love u, but seriously..

[Beasty]

1: I fucking hate this game. But I'm excited to see you again.

2: I really miss you and think of you often. It makes me happy to know that I can see you almost every day soon.

[loveLights]

I will leave you if things don't get better. I feel alone in the bed next to you. It's getting difficult to not flirt with other guys. I want attention. I want a boyfriend. I don't want to think you're special if you don't think I'm special. Why aren't I special enough to you? What was so special about her? Why do you get angry when I cry? Why do you want me around if you don't want me? I want a guarantee that things will get better. I want something from you that you can't give me. I want respect. I want peace. I want the years I gave you back. I want out

[mande]

J- You do this shit on purpose. Things are going great with C and you just have to jump in and be SU. What the hell? We never speak but you suddenly decide to call ME. I hate having to lie to C about who I'm speaking to. Did you forget he hates you?