last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Understand
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by Understand » Wed Jan 27, 2010 5:49 am

he would have hated it and is feeling bad enough as it is
Do not adjust your mind, there is a fault in reality

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vampirelover
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by vampirelover » Thu Jan 28, 2010 4:33 pm

i cant cope with that disapointed look on my bf face
longest with no slips - 2 years , 6 months
time since last slip : 2 days
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satori
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by satori » Sun Feb 21, 2010 9:14 am

- I'm too tired; I have no energy and am just really apathetic.
- doing it on my leg/hip feels weird; I want to be able to wear short sleeves soon as my arm heals so I'm trying not to add new ones there
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raise your hands into the sky
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stripysocks4christ
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by stripysocks4christ » Sun Feb 21, 2010 6:30 pm

i knew how much it would hurt those i love
"Love does not make the world go round... It’s what makes the ride worth while"
"Good friends lift you up when your wings forget to fly"

"Let Go and Let God"
"God will never let us fall without a plan on how to save us"
"For I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" – Philippians 4:13

"I only lied so I didn't have to see the tears of disappointment in your eyes"
"I don't want the world to see me, cos I don't think that they'd understand..."

xx Kitti xx

:heart: :ylwheart: :grnheart: :blueheart: :lpurpheart: :blueheart: :grnheart: :ylwheart: :heart:

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Heidi4DBT
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by Heidi4DBT » Mon Feb 22, 2010 10:18 pm

I don't want to hurt my loved ones again. I made a promise that I don't want to break. I need to overcome this so that I can deal with life.
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by Annybelly » Tue Feb 23, 2010 7:35 pm

I wanted to email kitti, and put on my place I'd had a SI free day.

I didn't want to dissapoint.

I felt like if I keep ignoring it, it'll go away.

I will not be dependant on it.
♥ "Hope. It is the only thing stronger than fear." ♥

♥ "You're not a bad person. You're a very good person, who bad things have happened to. Besides, the world isn't split into good people and Death Eaters. We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are." ♥

♥ "My thoughts are stars I can't fathom into constellations." ♥

♥ "I lit up like a Christmas tree, Hazel Grace." ♥

♥ "Things haven't always been this bad, therefore, things won't always be this bad." ♥

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Lucky071307
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by Lucky071307 » Sat Feb 27, 2010 2:20 am

Last time i wanted to SI i didn't because i decided to give it up for lent. This is proving to be very difficult but I'm determined to follow through. :)
"I try to live without you every time I do I feel dead. I know whats best for me but I want you instead, I'll keep on wasting all my time" -Over and Over by Three Days Grace

"I am weary of my crying: my throat is dried: mine eyes fail while I wait for my God." -Psalm 69

"The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved." -Mother Teresa of Calcutta

~Lucky (Last SI April 14th 2010)
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by crushedtin » Sat Feb 27, 2010 10:57 pm

I didn't because I gave it up for Lent too. And I need to prove to myself that I can do what I put my mind to; the relief wouldn't be worth how disappointed I'd be with myself.
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by southsider » Fri Mar 05, 2010 9:19 pm

Because I want to buy myself a cool ring to celebrate my six year "clean" date next winter. :D
☼ 12/13/2004 ☼
☼ there is hope ☼

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"If you really want to stay clean, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse."
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by stripysocks4christ » Sun Apr 04, 2010 6:19 pm

because i promised someone that i wouldnt. and i know how much it hurts people.
"Love does not make the world go round... It’s what makes the ride worth while"
"Good friends lift you up when your wings forget to fly"

"Let Go and Let God"
"God will never let us fall without a plan on how to save us"
"For I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" – Philippians 4:13

"I only lied so I didn't have to see the tears of disappointment in your eyes"
"I don't want the world to see me, cos I don't think that they'd understand..."

xx Kitti xx

:heart: :ylwheart: :grnheart: :blueheart: :lpurpheart: :blueheart: :grnheart: :ylwheart: :heart:

my place
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by half/hearted » Sat May 01, 2010 5:51 pm

...because I looked at my now-fading scars and decided that I want to have beautiful scar-free arms again, and if I SI, there will be more scars.

My Mederma-treated, slowly fading scars inspire me to find healthy coping mechanisms and not SI.
Please be gentle with me.

you will fly and you will crawl
god knows even angels fall
no such thing as you "lost it all"
god knows even angels fall :pinkstar:
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by strider 151 » Mon May 03, 2010 11:38 am

i need to be able to wear a strapless, knee length dress
it wouldnt just hurt myself but the people around me
it would mean turning away from god again
it would mean thinking up lies to explain the marks
it would mean having to hide in a toilet when getting changed at school
PBH, Telling my parents, My place - All welcome [hugs, stars, challenges, questions are all ok :gooddeal: :Fade-color

In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.

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*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by sweetelisum » Sat May 15, 2010 2:13 am

:blkstar: I realized that doing so was not going to make my feelings go away for good.
:blkstar: Instead I talked about it instead of bottling it up.
:blkstar: I wanted to show myself I could cope without
:blkstar: Like drinking, its only a temporary fix
:blkstar: I didn't want C to feel responsible
:blkstar: I didn't want another mark to explain.
:blkstar: Its spring and I don't want to have to cover it up
:blkstar: I want to start modeling again, and photoshoping it is a real bitch
"Hinged to forgetfulness
like a door,
she slowly closed out of
sight,
and she was the woman I loved,
but too many times she slept like
a mechanical deer in my caresses,
and I ached in the metal silence
of her dreams."
-Richard Brautigan
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by flyingturtle » Sat May 15, 2010 4:45 am

I didn't SI because I didn't want to have to hide it. :osmile: It's springtime and I love wearing short sleeves. I also didn't want the BF to find it. Also it was late and I was tired and didn't feel like cleaning up. So then I slept instead.
:redstar: :star: :ylwstar: :grnstar: :bluestar: :dkpurpstar:

2/26/2010
1 slip - 11/08/2014

:bluestar:My Place: Somewhere in the Between.
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KittyCath
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by KittyCath » Mon Jun 07, 2010 6:20 am

I was at work.......................I work in a hospital and people may notice my disappearence.
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by thewaves » Mon Jun 07, 2010 10:58 am

My cat came and curled up beside me and fell asleep with his head on me.
"I thought my ideas were so clear. I wanted to make an honest film. No lies whatsoever. I thought I had something so simple to say. Something useful to everybody. A film that could help bury forever all those dead things we carry within ourselves. Instead, I'm the one without the courage to bury anything at all. When did I go wrong? I really have nothing to say, but I want to say it all the same." -Federico Fellini's 8 1/2
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...beneath the waves...
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by calypso » Tue Jun 08, 2010 10:41 am

I seriously distracted myself.
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stripysocks4christ
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by stripysocks4christ » Tue Jun 08, 2010 9:22 pm

i knew deep down i didnt need to, i had other ways of coping.
"Love does not make the world go round... It’s what makes the ride worth while"
"Good friends lift you up when your wings forget to fly"

"Let Go and Let God"
"God will never let us fall without a plan on how to save us"
"For I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" – Philippians 4:13

"I only lied so I didn't have to see the tears of disappointment in your eyes"
"I don't want the world to see me, cos I don't think that they'd understand..."

xx Kitti xx

:heart: :ylwheart: :grnheart: :blueheart: :lpurpheart: :blueheart: :grnheart: :ylwheart: :heart:

my place
my poems
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Sprinklez
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by Sprinklez » Wed Jun 09, 2010 7:52 pm

I promised my darling CS that I wouldn't.
I refuse to start out this relationship with lies.
I want him to trust me.
8-21-04
5-17-2021
9/11/17 </3
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Annybelly
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Re: last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Post by Annybelly » Thu Jun 10, 2010 7:18 pm

because i dont need to. because it wouldnt help. because i am worth so so much more than si!
because i can cope without it.
♥ "Hope. It is the only thing stronger than fear." ♥

♥ "You're not a bad person. You're a very good person, who bad things have happened to. Besides, the world isn't split into good people and Death Eaters. We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are." ♥

♥ "My thoughts are stars I can't fathom into constellations." ♥

♥ "I lit up like a Christmas tree, Hazel Grace." ♥

♥ "Things haven't always been this bad, therefore, things won't always be this bad." ♥

My Place
My Efforts At Being Healthy
My Bus Butterfly Obsession

♥ DFTBA ♥
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