Reward Yourself

[pelagic]

Trying to distract yourself deserves a reward I've never heard of God's eyes, that sounds really fun! Or, perhaps you have an old pair of jeans you could draw over and tear rips in it, then parade around the house dancing in the silly jeans? Being silly is fun!

Rewards for a Bunny Owner

IF you own a bunny, the funnest thing ever is getting a bunch of card board boxes and making houses for your rabbit! They can hop on them, go through them (cut open doorways for them), fill some with hay or treats (like lettuce (not iceburg), apple, carrots, broccli, bok choy?). I love doing that, I think it's loads of fun!

Of course, that's only if you have a pet bunny (I don't, but I volunteer at a bunny shelter)

[Librariana]

Your reply about old jeans reminded me of another one...cut the legs off an old pair of jeans and turn the 'butt' part inside out. Thread a needle with handquilting thread, then sew up the place on the 'butt' part where you cut off the legs. Cut a strip of denim out of the cut off legs, fold it right sides facing together, then sew it into a strap and sew it onto the jeans bag. Then use fabric glue or a hand riveter (about a buck at a craft store) to attach rhinestones to the jeans bag. They're really cute, and they take about an hour or two to make, so it's a good distraction.

If you can't handle scissors or needles, cut the jeans ahead of time when you're not feeling bad, and use a fabric stapler/baster (About a tenner at the craft store, no exposed sharp parts) and fabric glue to complete the project when you are.

Just a thought.

[pelagic]

Possible Rewards

I love reading poetry, so why not buy a large book filled with poems and read some of your favourites when you feel really low? The good thing about buying a book (for any problem shoppers out there) is that you only need to buy it once and can read it again and again and again. If you cannot afford/handle buying one at the moment, there are a lot of poems on the Internet you can print off and keep (I like to put a few short ones on my fridge, or near my mirror, places where I will read them frequently and places where I need some comfort).

Actions To Reward

-Holding a door open for someone
-Resisting urges, even if it was for only fifteen minutes
-Dragging yourself out of bed
-Calling a friend
-Asking for help/comfort
-Holding open an elevator for someone
-Leaving a generous tip
-Smiling to yourself in the mirror
-Going out for a long walk outside
-Cleaning the house
-Getting through a rough night
-Looking up new coping methods
-Doing your homework
-Creating a new goal for yourself
-Helping someone out.

[pelagic]

I just recently read a post asking if there were any long term rewards to replace the reward of SI (i.e., you have the actual SI, and then you have the scars as a reminder/reward/something to admire). The post asked if there were any long term rewards for being SI-Free, things that could be with you always.

I'm just brainstorming some long-term reward ideas, if anybody has any suggestions that is an awesome idea (I've noticed some good distractions that also end up rewarding you in the end (like the demin bag), keep them coming!).

Long Term Rewards
Whenever you feel urgy, see if you can go and stay on BUS. Change your siggy, perhaps to say when your last SI was, or put on a BUS badge (one week, 30 days, etc). Tickerfactory.com has some amazing reminders at how far you've gone from your last SI.

It's a way to make you proud of yourself for your healthy accomplishment, a constant reminder that you CAN do it. Maybe design your own BUS badges if the large circular image doesn't float your boat, mm?


Another good long term 'reward' that is with you forever is getting a temporary tattoo, symbolizing that you have endured tough times and that you CAN be SI-Free. Or, if you are short on temporary tattoos, why not doodle a smiley face, star, heart, or cow for every week that you're SI-Free? (or, a star for one day, a heart for one week, a smiley face for two weeks, a cow for a month, etc.).


More coming soon...

[pelagic]

Long Term Rewards

Tie an orange string (buy a ball of orange yarn at a store, it's only a couple of dollars and will last you a lifetime) around your wrist, and for every week you are SI-Free, put a white bead on the bracelet. If you happened to slip and want to count the slip, put an orange bead on the bracelet (either for each time you slipped or, for each week you completed SI-Free but had a slip or two, put on an orange bead instead). After a month, change the string to a different colour and put on a white bead for every two weeks you are SI-Free. Two months after the first month (meaning...in total...3 months free, sorry if I'm confusing), change it to purple, and put on a white bead for every three weeks you are SI-Free...

You can do any order of colours you want, or any way of beading it, that's just an example You can stick with the orange, or change colours.

You can also do this with painting your nails, wearing earings, anklets, necklaces, rings, etc. It's a bit harder with males, sorry guys!

Create Your Own Rewards

In your favourite colour of ink, write/print off a list of positive things that make you happy, or your favourite things, and put them in a place you frequently see (i.e. your fridge, or taped on your bedroom door). In your second favourite colour of ink, write/print off a list of things you need to do, things you should do, and things you want to do and put it beside the first list. Each time you do something good (ie had a good day at school/work, cleaned your kitchen, ate a healthy breakfast, went for a walk, doodled instead of SIed, etc), put a check beside it (in your second list). Then chose a reward from the first list, a reward for something you did right, and use that reward to celebrate your fantastic feat!


Sorry if all this type is confusing to read, I'm a bit tired ^^

[pelagic]

You got into a big fight with someone, and feel very urgy from the outcome.

Fights are hard. After going through all that stress, perhaps you could try to pamper yourself? Have a long warm bubble bath (when you get out, cover yourself with baby/talcum powder. So soft!), light a few candles, sprinkle a bit of essential oils around your room. Hot water bottles are very comforting as well!

Then, later, when you are calmer, perhaps you could apologize and try to make things better.

[pelagic]

It's the holidays, and you are stressed out about buying gifts. You are having a tough time with money, and don't know what to do. You feel stupid for not being able to be the perfect family member/friend, feel stupid for not being able to afford the perfect gift.

Relax. Christmas/holidays are always stressful for everybody. Soon, you need to organize your time and money. But right now, it's time to reward yourself. Why? Because you want to do something for a loved one, and that always deserves a reward.

Perhaps you could buy yourself a small thing, something inexpensive? Or you could burn yourself a CD of all your favourite songs (and listen to them when you need to relax/cheer up).

If you really feel that your gifts aren't "perfect" for friends/family, make it so that the thought really does count. If you have no gift ideas for a close friend, buy a cheap picture frame. Glue Christmas (or whatever holiday you celebrate) wrapping paper on it, and put in a picture of you and your friend. It'll be heart-warming and something your friend will always cherish (you can do the same thing for a family member).

If you can knit, why not knit a few simple dishclothes? Wrap a piece of jewellery or a candle holder in a knitted dishcloth (tie the top off with a red ribbon), and viola! A lovely thoughtful gift!

So relax for the holidays, and remember to treat yourself (making gifts is really fun too, a great distraction!).

[cinnamon_spider]

I love your ideas. They all sound like they could really help. I'll have to try some of them.

[pelagic]

I hope they do help

Your day was horrible, and you felt that you, too, were horrible. You have nothing to reward yourself for.

If you feel that you've done absolutely nothing to be rewarded, why not do something that deserves rewarding? Especially around this time of year (Christmas time/winter holidays), a little bit of good goes a long way.

-Donate money to a homeless shelter
-Volunteer at a Soup Kitchen
-Donate toys to a Children's Hospital
-Volunteer to set up your city's Christmas decorations
-Volunteer at an animal shelter
-Donate money to families in need
-Shovel a neighbourly senoir's driveway for free
-Buy a friendly neighbour a gift and leave it on their doorstep anonymously
-Bake a batch of cookies or a cake and donate it to a Soup Kitchen.

[shelligurl07]

thank you...this is just what i needed:D

[pelagic]

I'm glad to hear that, Shelligurl
If you have any suggestions, don't hesitate to post.

[shelligurl07]

i plan on useing that bacelet idea! i bought whole bunch of beads for school project...so this would be good for me! YEAH you have great ideas!

[lily_trying]

i loved reading this thread, thank you for sharing all these ideas.

the temporary tattoo reminded me of a reward i used to use -- getting a henna tattoo kit & making a henna tattoo of something that was meaningful to me. they usually would fade between 2-4 weeks at a time, so i would put them on as a reward each time i went without si for that time. i also used it as a reward if i went without any of the behaviours i wanted to change...

the poetry suggestion also reminded me for the times when money/shopping/getting out is an issue -- google book search seems to have a lot of books in their entirety now, and sites like amazon have the "search inside this book" type of feature... i've been using those things as a way to read new books when i'm not able to get to the store or library or don't have the money to shop. i find it's also a good distraction trying to search it out as well.

thanks again for all these great ideas!

[Roxi]

I really like the corn starch idea thing... what's also nice is blowing bubbles or fingerpainting

[pelagic]

MORE REWARD STUFF
I've neglected this thread for a while. I'll change that!

Rewards
Lying down in a public park with a blanket. Either bring a book or a handheld videogame or whatever, or just lie down and doze off. It's very relaxing, and you don't have to do it for hours, just even fifteen minutes or so.
Drawing with sidewalk chalk is very fun! Of course, you have to purchase sidewalk chalk if you don't have any, but just a few dollars can buy you months worth! Then, draw outside either stars or rainbows or moons or happy faces or whatever on however many hours/days/weeks/months/years you are SI-Free (It doesn't matter if it's only three hours free, it's still not SIing, right?)
Snuggle up with a hot water bottle or bean bag and sing a song made up on the top of your head about everything good in your life.

[Understand]

Cool thread idea! There are some great reasons for rewards here that I'll have to remember (and remind others of!) Thank you for posting.

[VowsOfSadness]

I like this thread.

Sometimes if I've worked really hard, after I pay all my bills I try to put aside some money each month or paycheck to save up for something I might want. The anticipation makes me work harder because the harder I work the more money I earn, thus more put aside. Then even though I am usually very low on money because of my bills I have this aside, so I always get a little kick when I finally decide to go out & get something. Once a dry erase calendar for my room, I bought a movie I loved, a hat ordered online, a nice dinner out, and this last time a spunky case for my cell phone. It always cheers me up for awhile because it's nice to get something new.

[my.lullaby]

This forum is exactly what I needed. I spent the morning locked in my room, my mom outside yelling, staring at the pencil case I keep my SI stuff in and trying not to SI, and now I'm pretty happy.

Some more suggestions for things to reward for:
-holding back the urge to SI
-treating your cuts/burns/etc
-regretting it
-wanting to stop/change
-doing what you do in regular life for a day
-stopping and thinking before a bad decision
-for any truly huge things you accomplish, do anything and everything you want
-treat yourself just for having big goals in life <3