Feeling Depressed

[Feeorin]

I know why too. My *Ex* Fiance and I While we were together concieved a child together. We broke up because I finally put down the line of I need to be a female ... And she doesn't want to date a female.

So here comes the real problem - What will happen to my child? I know that she'd fight for every right to keep my child, and lets face it, Right now she'd be best being with her rather than me. But ... Thats MY child too. Shes part of me But I dont know what to do.

At times in the past, I've cut due to this emotion ... Stress over my child. And She's walked in on me cutting. I Felt like shit afterwards. How on earth do we explain that to our kids.

"Daddy what are you doing?" It was heartbreaking, yet I still dont honestly want to stop.

I know it'd be best for her to be with her mommy but I still can't help but want her to be with me, even if it isn't the best of things for her, nor myself, at this point of time.

[Artemisia]

wow. that's heavy. i'm sorry.

[Feeorin]

Thanks for the hugs artemisia.

[Sheliya]

I read. No advice, but I just wanted to let you know I read, and also to say that if you post this on the main board, you'll probably get more replies. A lot more people read and comment on the stuff posted there, and the Coping section frequented as often. Just a heads up. Welcome to bus, btw.

[badgirl22]

wow that sounds hard. I dono what to say except I am listening and I am here if u want to vent or talk or anything. I dono what I would do in your situation..can u try to stop cutting to show that you are atleast trying so that you can keep your child? That must be hard. Hugs for you if u want them.
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-Badgirl22

[Feeorin]

She doesn't want to be with me. I stopped cutting for her for a while, but ... SHe doesn't want to be with me because I want to be a woman and she doesnt want to be with one so..