tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.
Moderators: Spidey, noldo
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a7xcncangel
- bus conductor

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- Location: Michigan
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amyfairy
- postinating the countryside

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- Location: UK
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by amyfairy » Wed Jun 10, 2009 1:24 pm
I'm really missing home today. I feel like crying when I shouldn't because in general, life is good. Something exciting is happening and I don't know why I think it's ruined when I have evidence to the contray. I am just so fed up of living here and having no friends when I'm living. I have ace friends but they're not here.

And I see no end to this situation. I honestly feel that I'm going to be stuck here forever and it makes me want to cry and not take care of myself because it's an awful thought. I miss home today.
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HakunaMatata
- one of us

- Posts: 6860
- Joined: Thu Oct 06, 2005 8:30 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: See that place in the distance? Not there!
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by HakunaMatata » Wed Jun 10, 2009 2:15 pm
I think I'm about to make the wrong decision that I'm gonna regret. I hope to goodness my gut feeling isn't going to be proved right.

*NO HUGS PLEASE*
Ache-me se for capaz HM's place- everyone welcome but please read first post!
'Love is worth everything. How much are you willing to risk?'~Umara, gone forever, forgotten never.
'You can't put a price on happiness. Follow your dreams'~ Mithz
I don't like country and western. I don't like rock music, I don't like rockabilly or rock and roll particularly. I don't like much, really, do I? But what I do like, I love passionately. ~ The Pet Shop Boys
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ChangeTheWorld
- sprouting branches

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- Location: Melbourne, Australia
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by ChangeTheWorld » Thu Jun 11, 2009 4:02 am
i don't think i've gotten any better from whatever it is i'm meant to have.
Strength.Compassion.Creativity.
"she wonders how many women are walking around this world feeling the tingling of their amputated wings. remembering what it was to fly. to sing." Andrea Gibson "Blue Blanket"
" I come in too many flavours for just one fucking spoon" (Stacey ann chin"Crossfire")
"I want to erase the straight lines, so i can be me" (Stacey-Ann Chin " If only out of vanity")
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=194582 every challenge met, every obstacle conquered..aka MJ's Brand New Place. Read along as much as you please.
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a7xcncangel
- bus conductor

- Posts: 5045
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- Location: Michigan
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by a7xcncangel » Tue Jun 16, 2009 12:29 am

I can't say no to a relationship, even if I know it's not right.

I can't help but be nice and pretend things are ok around my ex despite what he's done to me.

I kind of want to SI, just so I know I still have the option.

I feel fat.

I'm craving junkfood so badly right now.

I know how to fix my problems, it's just that either I can't or I don't want to.

I'm scared of being away from BUS when I'm in Germany.
I want to watch porn.
Mum: ReineDuSommeil
Sister: waydownsouth, nomad2207, noldo
Brother: sirjnj
Daughter: Azira
Cousin: DuchessN, jadestarwalking
Aunt: Cheycatsgarden
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scooter
- settling in

- Posts: 91
- Joined: Wed Dec 24, 2008 6:30 am
- Location: sonoma, ca
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Contact:
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by scooter » Thu Jul 02, 2009 1:40 am
****ED****SI*****

I relapsed with my Ed

i miss my abusive dad

i lost XX pounds in 4-5 weeks 2 months ago, you never noticed

I threw up today

I want to Si (burn) the fuck out of my arm

I miss my treatment centers and their security
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breathing
- bus mechanic

- Posts: 3133
- Joined: Sat Sep 29, 2007 1:14 am
- Gender: n/a
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by breathing » Fri Jul 03, 2009 4:46 am
I can't stand others' happiness right now. It just depresses and triggers me more.
And I just remembered that tomorrow, the new forums are going up. I don't SI that much anymore but I am now suddenly paranoid.
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steady hands
- quintessential regular

- Posts: 2245
- Joined: Fri Sep 02, 2005 2:05 am
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by steady hands » Fri Jul 03, 2009 9:31 am
I didn't text you just because I wanted to talk to you again.
I texted you because I know that you're the only one who I could maybe talk to about all of my shit that could possibly handle it.
I'm sorry I can't find the right words to say.
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breathing
- bus mechanic

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by breathing » Sat Jul 11, 2009 1:09 am
I am so lonely right now... but, at the same time, I don't want to be around anyone.
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steady hands
- quintessential regular

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by steady hands » Mon Jul 13, 2009 5:27 am
I AM COMPLETELY TERRIFIED.
ABSOLUTELY AND COMPLETELY TERRIFIED.
where do I go from here?
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HakunaMatata
- one of us

- Posts: 6860
- Joined: Thu Oct 06, 2005 8:30 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: See that place in the distance? Not there!
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by HakunaMatata » Mon Jul 13, 2009 11:00 am
Please don't judge me
The only reason I'm still with you is cause I can't afford our bills on my own. Hell you still owe for the gas and electricity at the old place, yet you won't discuss it with me. Thanks for picking up some of the responsibility. I'm not unhappy with you, just ambivalent, so I figure I can hang in till Christmas so we can sort the house out. I don't even feel like splitting up over Christmas is mean. I don't care anymore. I've not forgotten you strangling me, nor how you tried to twist it into it being my own fault, but it's easier not to argue. Keep my head down, mother you, ensure the bills get paid and have sex with you. You'll be happy and I can live the rest of my life as normal. It shouldn't be that way but frankly I'm not too fussed, we have some good times and laughs still so I'm happy enough. Then I can be my own person again and start next year afresh

*NO HUGS PLEASE*
Ache-me se for capaz HM's place- everyone welcome but please read first post!
'Love is worth everything. How much are you willing to risk?'~Umara, gone forever, forgotten never.
'You can't put a price on happiness. Follow your dreams'~ Mithz
I don't like country and western. I don't like rock music, I don't like rockabilly or rock and roll particularly. I don't like much, really, do I? But what I do like, I love passionately. ~ The Pet Shop Boys
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VowsOfSadness
- sock rocker

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Contact:
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by VowsOfSadness » Tue Jul 14, 2009 3:49 am
I let you get my hopes up again.
damn you
I need to stay over you & away from you.
...at least for a bit.
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breathing
- bus mechanic

- Posts: 3133
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- Gender: n/a
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by breathing » Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:49 am
I feel terrible right now. In more ways than one.
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VowsOfSadness
- sock rocker

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Contact:
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by VowsOfSadness » Thu Jul 16, 2009 5:03 am
I'm obsessed with you and that's why I can't be friends.
Because I love you. You were the first person I loved. Because I go crazy. And you don't need me.
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xXelmoscaresmeXx
- knows the ropes

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- Location: MD Age:23
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by xXelmoscaresmeXx » Thu Jul 16, 2009 4:43 pm
Even though I push everyone away...
.............all I want is for someone to say.............
....."I will never let you go".....
Recovery is possible, I promise
My Aunt is Ultimate Starshine. My mom is snowangel_03. My big sisters are jadestarwalking and Birdie.
dont click this link
Facts of life:
-Purple monkeys eat grapes, not bananas.
-The answer to life is five point tomato [toe-may-toe]
-Zebra is not 'zee-brah' it's f-ing 'Z-eh-brah' like Debra
-You will need to count your toes
-The f-ing Zebra will ALWAYS eat your cookie. Nothing will stop it
-Pooh Bear is dead
-There will always be a moose, don't fight it, it will win
-----My Expressions-----
-----My Place-----
-----My PBH-----
*Stephanie*
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Spidey
- board admin

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- Joined: Thu Jan 26, 2006 9:30 pm
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by Spidey » Thu Jul 16, 2009 8:20 pm
I should likely just end the damn friendship, if only to save my sanity.
there is, in the end, the letting go.
-marya hornbacher
spidey immer voran
(spidey ever onward)
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steady hands
- quintessential regular

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by steady hands » Thu Jul 16, 2009 9:43 pm
I don't know what this is.
I don't know if I will ever be able to get over this.
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snowangel_03
- my other car is a bus

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- Location: Harwich, Essex
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amyfairy
- postinating the countryside

- Posts: 23286
- Joined: Tue Mar 02, 2004 10:39 pm
- Location: UK
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by amyfairy » Fri Jul 17, 2009 12:35 am
I don't care anymore.