Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
- a7xcncangel
- bus conductor
- Posts: 5045
- Joined: Fri Jan 02, 2009 9:30 pm
- Gender: male
- Location: Michigan
I still want my ex back despite how he treated me
I want to punch R in the face for stealing my ex away and being so fucking inconsiderate.
I don't want a boyfriend
Yet none the less I can't control myself from latching onto every guy that shows interest and and is nice to me, even if I know he's a player and has had like 6 gfs over the past year...
I kind of do want to get intimate with him despite by fears of STDs.
I really want to have a relationship with a girl.
I'm not sure I'm emotionally and mentally stable enough to go to Germany w/o my parents and much supervision and having WAAYY more freedom than I do here in the US (ie drinking, smoking, clubbing, etc).
I have a crush on my German host sister.
I want to punch R in the face for stealing my ex away and being so fucking inconsiderate.
I don't want a boyfriend
Yet none the less I can't control myself from latching onto every guy that shows interest and and is nice to me, even if I know he's a player and has had like 6 gfs over the past year...
I kind of do want to get intimate with him despite by fears of STDs.
I really want to have a relationship with a girl.
I'm not sure I'm emotionally and mentally stable enough to go to Germany w/o my parents and much supervision and having WAAYY more freedom than I do here in the US (ie drinking, smoking, clubbing, etc).
I have a crush on my German host sister.
Mum: ReineDuSommeil
Sister: waydownsouth, nomad2207, noldo
Brother: sirjnj
Daughter: Azira
Cousin: DuchessN, jadestarwalking
Aunt: Cheycatsgarden
Sister: waydownsouth, nomad2207, noldo
Brother: sirjnj
Daughter: Azira
Cousin: DuchessN, jadestarwalking
Aunt: Cheycatsgarden
I'm really missing home today. I feel like crying when I shouldn't because in general, life is good. Something exciting is happening and I don't know why I think it's ruined when I have evidence to the contray. I am just so fed up of living here and having no friends when I'm living. I have ace friends but they're not here. And I see no end to this situation. I honestly feel that I'm going to be stuck here forever and it makes me want to cry and not take care of myself because it's an awful thought. I miss home today.
- HakunaMatata
- one of us
- Posts: 6860
- Joined: Thu Oct 06, 2005 8:30 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: See that place in the distance? Not there!
I think I'm about to make the wrong decision that I'm gonna regret. I hope to goodness my gut feeling isn't going to be proved right.
Ache-me se for capaz HM's place- everyone welcome but please read first post!
'Love is worth everything. How much are you willing to risk?'~Umara, gone forever, forgotten never.
'You can't put a price on happiness. Follow your dreams'~ Mithz
I don't like country and western. I don't like rock music, I don't like rockabilly or rock and roll particularly. I don't like much, really, do I? But what I do like, I love passionately. ~ The Pet Shop Boys
- ChangeTheWorld
- sprouting branches
- Posts: 1064
- Joined: Wed Feb 18, 2009 11:01 am
- Gender: Unicorn
- Location: Melbourne, Australia
i don't think i've gotten any better from whatever it is i'm meant to have.
Strength.Compassion.Creativity.
"she wonders how many women are walking around this world feeling the tingling of their amputated wings. remembering what it was to fly. to sing." Andrea Gibson "Blue Blanket"
" I come in too many flavours for just one fucking spoon" (Stacey ann chin"Crossfire")
"I want to erase the straight lines, so i can be me" (Stacey-Ann Chin " If only out of vanity")
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=194582 every challenge met, every obstacle conquered..aka MJ's Brand New Place. Read along as much as you please.
"she wonders how many women are walking around this world feeling the tingling of their amputated wings. remembering what it was to fly. to sing." Andrea Gibson "Blue Blanket"
" I come in too many flavours for just one fucking spoon" (Stacey ann chin"Crossfire")
"I want to erase the straight lines, so i can be me" (Stacey-Ann Chin " If only out of vanity")
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=194582 every challenge met, every obstacle conquered..aka MJ's Brand New Place. Read along as much as you please.
- a7xcncangel
- bus conductor
- Posts: 5045
- Joined: Fri Jan 02, 2009 9:30 pm
- Gender: male
- Location: Michigan
I can't say no to a relationship, even if I know it's not right.
I can't help but be nice and pretend things are ok around my ex despite what he's done to me.
I kind of want to SI, just so I know I still have the option.
I feel fat.
I'm craving junkfood so badly right now.
I know how to fix my problems, it's just that either I can't or I don't want to.
I'm scared of being away from BUS when I'm in Germany.
I want to watch porn.
I can't help but be nice and pretend things are ok around my ex despite what he's done to me.
I kind of want to SI, just so I know I still have the option.
I feel fat.
I'm craving junkfood so badly right now.
I know how to fix my problems, it's just that either I can't or I don't want to.
I'm scared of being away from BUS when I'm in Germany.
I want to watch porn.
Mum: ReineDuSommeil
Sister: waydownsouth, nomad2207, noldo
Brother: sirjnj
Daughter: Azira
Cousin: DuchessN, jadestarwalking
Aunt: Cheycatsgarden
Sister: waydownsouth, nomad2207, noldo
Brother: sirjnj
Daughter: Azira
Cousin: DuchessN, jadestarwalking
Aunt: Cheycatsgarden
****ED****SI*****
I relapsed with my Ed
i miss my abusive dad
i lost XX pounds in 4-5 weeks 2 months ago, you never noticed
I threw up today
I want to Si (burn) the fuck out of my arm
I miss my treatment centers and their security
I relapsed with my Ed
i miss my abusive dad
i lost XX pounds in 4-5 weeks 2 months ago, you never noticed
I threw up today
I want to Si (burn) the fuck out of my arm
I miss my treatment centers and their security
There's sometimes a weird benefit to having an alcoholic, violent father. He really motivated me in that I never wanted to be anything like him.
<a href="http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=128862"> *Scooters Place*
<a href="http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=128862"> *Scooters Place*
- steady hands
- quintessential regular
- Posts: 2245
- Joined: Fri Sep 02, 2005 2:05 am
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
I am so lonely right now... but, at the same time, I don't want to be around anyone.
- steady hands
- quintessential regular
- Posts: 2245
- Joined: Fri Sep 02, 2005 2:05 am
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
I AM COMPLETELY TERRIFIED.
ABSOLUTELY AND COMPLETELY TERRIFIED.
where do I go from here?
ABSOLUTELY AND COMPLETELY TERRIFIED.
where do I go from here?
- HakunaMatata
- one of us
- Posts: 6860
- Joined: Thu Oct 06, 2005 8:30 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: See that place in the distance? Not there!
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
Please don't judge me
The only reason I'm still with you is cause I can't afford our bills on my own. Hell you still owe for the gas and electricity at the old place, yet you won't discuss it with me. Thanks for picking up some of the responsibility. I'm not unhappy with you, just ambivalent, so I figure I can hang in till Christmas so we can sort the house out. I don't even feel like splitting up over Christmas is mean. I don't care anymore. I've not forgotten you strangling me, nor how you tried to twist it into it being my own fault, but it's easier not to argue. Keep my head down, mother you, ensure the bills get paid and have sex with you. You'll be happy and I can live the rest of my life as normal. It shouldn't be that way but frankly I'm not too fussed, we have some good times and laughs still so I'm happy enough. Then I can be my own person again and start next year afresh
The only reason I'm still with you is cause I can't afford our bills on my own. Hell you still owe for the gas and electricity at the old place, yet you won't discuss it with me. Thanks for picking up some of the responsibility. I'm not unhappy with you, just ambivalent, so I figure I can hang in till Christmas so we can sort the house out. I don't even feel like splitting up over Christmas is mean. I don't care anymore. I've not forgotten you strangling me, nor how you tried to twist it into it being my own fault, but it's easier not to argue. Keep my head down, mother you, ensure the bills get paid and have sex with you. You'll be happy and I can live the rest of my life as normal. It shouldn't be that way but frankly I'm not too fussed, we have some good times and laughs still so I'm happy enough. Then I can be my own person again and start next year afresh
Ache-me se for capaz HM's place- everyone welcome but please read first post!
'Love is worth everything. How much are you willing to risk?'~Umara, gone forever, forgotten never.
'You can't put a price on happiness. Follow your dreams'~ Mithz
I don't like country and western. I don't like rock music, I don't like rockabilly or rock and roll particularly. I don't like much, really, do I? But what I do like, I love passionately. ~ The Pet Shop Boys
- VowsOfSadness
- sock rocker
- Posts: 3975
- Joined: Sat Dec 04, 2004 1:33 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: Pittsburgh, PA AGE:20
- Contact:
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
I let you get my hopes up again.
damn you
I need to stay over you & away from you.
...at least for a bit.
damn you
I need to stay over you & away from you.
...at least for a bit.
*Challenges welcome*
I always love a
I woke up this morning, I suddenly realized we're all in this together.
Drop by my place & say hi
Ask me anything!!!
I'm fully Recovered!
I always love a
Drop by my place & say hi
Ask me anything!!!
I'm fully Recovered!
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
I feel terrible right now. In more ways than one.
- VowsOfSadness
- sock rocker
- Posts: 3975
- Joined: Sat Dec 04, 2004 1:33 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: Pittsburgh, PA AGE:20
- Contact:
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
I'm obsessed with you and that's why I can't be friends.
Because I love you. You were the first person I loved. Because I go crazy. And you don't need me.
Because I love you. You were the first person I loved. Because I go crazy. And you don't need me.
*Challenges welcome*
I always love a
I woke up this morning, I suddenly realized we're all in this together.
Drop by my place & say hi
Ask me anything!!!
I'm fully Recovered!
I always love a
Drop by my place & say hi
Ask me anything!!!
I'm fully Recovered!
- xXelmoscaresmeXx
- knows the ropes
- Posts: 4533
- Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 10:40 pm
- Gender: Girl
- Location: MD Age:23
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
Even though I push everyone away...
.............all I want is for someone to say.............
....."I will never let you go".....
.............all I want is for someone to say.............
....."I will never let you go".....
Recovery is possible, I promise
My Aunt is Ultimate Starshine. My mom is snowangel_03. My big sisters are jadestarwalking and Birdie.
dont click this link
Facts of life:
-Purple monkeys eat grapes, not bananas.
-The answer to life is five point tomato [toe-may-toe]
-Zebra is not 'zee-brah' it's f-ing 'Z-eh-brah' like Debra
-You will need to count your toes
-The f-ing Zebra will ALWAYS eat your cookie. Nothing will stop it
-Pooh Bear is dead
-There will always be a moose, don't fight it, it will win
-----My Expressions-----
-----My Place-----
-----My PBH-----
*Stephanie*
My Aunt is Ultimate Starshine. My mom is snowangel_03. My big sisters are jadestarwalking and Birdie.
dont click this link
Facts of life:
-Purple monkeys eat grapes, not bananas.
-The answer to life is five point tomato [toe-may-toe]
-Zebra is not 'zee-brah' it's f-ing 'Z-eh-brah' like Debra
-You will need to count your toes
-The f-ing Zebra will ALWAYS eat your cookie. Nothing will stop it
-Pooh Bear is dead
-There will always be a moose, don't fight it, it will win
-----My Place-----
-----My PBH-----
*Stephanie*
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
I should likely just end the damn friendship, if only to save my sanity.
-marya hornbacher
spidey immer voran
(spidey ever onward)
- steady hands
- quintessential regular
- Posts: 2245
- Joined: Fri Sep 02, 2005 2:05 am
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
I don't know what this is.
I don't know if I will ever be able to get over this.
I don't know if I will ever be able to get over this.
- snowangel_03
- my other car is a bus
- Posts: 34525
- Joined: Wed May 19, 2004 5:47 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: Harwich, Essex
- Contact:
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
I don't love you anymore
Last SI: --
> My Sigillum Diaboli - Read 1stPost <
KLove24's twin | Owns ultimate starshine | Haven's special RW buddy
Oftentimes all we need is a thought or a message to help us see another side to the problem,
or just some hope that life will be better - magicmum
Hugs & PM's are fine
The Truth that can set Souls Free is Buried within Sweet Pandemonium
To cry is to know that you're alive
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
I don't care anymore.
- acdcrocker1909
- forum moderator emeritus
- Posts: 10453
- Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 3:42 am
- Gender: Transguy
- Location: Little Blue dot in a sea of Red
Re: Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]
i love the rain.. because it means I can cuddle close to you under an umbrella and people won't assume we're dating.. just that we want to stay dry..
Music is life.. we each have our own symphony.. and we control it for the most part.. sometimes instruments drop out.. and others join in.. but when the music fades and the symphony is done.. then we have created a beautiful, personal piece. - Me.
Less Traveled Roads <-- Everyone Welcome.
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