Candys Coping Thread

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

Moderators: Spidey, noldo

Post Reply
User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Fri Sep 26, 2008 7:50 pm

I am doing alright. I am keeping myself today. I went to my doctor's this morning and it will take awhile longer for my wrist to heal,so I decided to start using my coping skills,cause one thing about tenditis,if I spell that right,it does take time for it to heal. NO SI so far and that is great. I am feeling pretty good,just frustrated with my wrist,but I will be ok. I know it has been awhile since I have been on,but I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I am going to enjoy my day and take care of myself. be back on real soon. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Sep 29, 2008 8:52 pm

I wish I had better news. I went to see my doctor and my wrist is still not healed from tenditios,so I hope that it heals soon. I have to go to court ,cause my boy-friend did not pay his insurance on his truck and we got pulled over while I was driving it. I am not to happy and it was my fault for driving it,but I thought he payed it.NO SI so far and that is great,with everything that is going on.I am just hanging in there.I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I go to court next Wed. I am taking care of myself right now. I will be alright. be back on later. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Fri Oct 10, 2008 5:41 am

I am doing alright. I saw a doctor about my wrist,he gave me a shot and he wants to see me in 6 weeks,to see if it healed. I hope and pray that it does. I am feeling good and program is going good. I have not started to write yet,but hopefully soon I will be able to. NO self-harm so far and that is great. My boy-friend is doing good. I have been working on my coping skills and it has helped me alot. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I am hanging in there and keeping myself busy. I will be just fine. Be back on soon.taking care of myself. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Tue Oct 28, 2008 4:09 am

I know that it has been awhile since I have been here. I am doing alright, I have been using some of my coping skills,even though I have not started back in my journal,cause I have to see my wrist doctor next month,so hopefully he will tell me it has healed.I hope he does.I had tendititos in my wrist and it has lasted for so long. I have not done any self-harm and that is great,even though the urges are there,I keep fighting them. My boy-friend is doing great and we have been getting along real well. I know that I need to focus more on my coping skills and to help myself more than I have,cause I can not take care of everyone else,I need to take care of myself right now. I am feeling pretty good and I wish there was a DBT skill group in my area,but there is none,and my program does not offer it either,so that gets frustrating. I am hanging in there and taking care of myself. I promise that I will not be gone to long this time. going to take care of myself tonight.Be back on later on.promise. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Dec 29, 2008 12:28 am

I am doing alright.I know it has been awhile since I wrote here.I had a Merry Christmas and I hope everyone else did. I have not done any self-harm lately and my wrist has gotten better,so I have been writing in my journal. The program has been going good and my boy-friend is doing good. I am sorry that it took awhile to get back on and I am glad that I did. I just wanted to let everyone know that I am doing ok. I will be back on later.taking care of myself. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
balletomane
one of us
one of us
Posts: 13705
Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 3:54 am

Post by balletomane » Mon Dec 29, 2008 1:15 am

I'm glad to hear that you are taking care of yourself, Candy. Happy holidays. :redstar:

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Dec 29, 2008 2:04 am

Thank so much. Happy Holidays to you as well.take care.HUGS
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Fri Feb 13, 2009 3:45 am

I know it has been awhile since I have been on here and there is soo much going on with me.I have not been feeling well mentally or emotionally right now,even though I have not done any self-harm,there are times that I feel like it though. I went to my gyn on Feb 4th to have a wart remove and I have to go back on the 18th to have it check out. It is not healed yet and it is not infected,it just seems like it takes a long time to heal. I am having a problem with my boy-friend cause of it. I feel bad that I have not been on here,but it has been very rough for me. I am hanging in there and doing the best I can. My anxiety is up right now. The program is going good for me,but other stuff is getting to be to much for me. I will keep everyone posted and I will be alright.taking care of myself.
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Aug 16, 2010 3:58 am

I know that I have not been on for awhile. This is Candy.I have not been doing so great. I lost my cousin a few months ago,her diabates took her. I am a diabates also,but I just take one pill for it and my sugar has been real good.I do not check my sugar at all.My boy-friend and I broke up,we are just friends now. My friend has lung cancer and I have not heard any news about how she is doing. Well about me,well I have been dealing with depression and my self-harm is picking up again,not that bad,the depressions is worse. I still go to day treatment program,we have a new doctor there and he is not the greatest. He changed my diagnosis to Mood Disorder NOS from Borderline Personality Disorder. I have been feeling so depressed lately and having crying spells alot of times. I do not see him till the 25 of this month,so I am fighting everything. I am glad to be back and I am soo sorry that i have been off for awhile. I need friends right now and I am glad that I made my way back here. I meet with my therpaist tomorrow,so i am glad about that,cause it is getting to me,everything is. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing and I need to stay in touch more. Any suggestions will be helpful. I am taking it one day at a time. I will be alright.I just want to feel better and not feel so alone,like I do.Going to watch t.v till I go to bed. hugs to you all. :1petals:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Aug 18, 2010 2:13 am

I am having a hard fighting the urges of self-harm tonight and that is why I came on here to get support and if anyone has any good ideals to help me,please post it here.I am watching t.v and calling friends which does help me alot. I feel somewhat better than I did before,but the urges are still there.I need to check out the board more and find things to help me with this. I have done so great with SI and now it is like I am messing up. I have been under to much stress and being alone does not help either. I have program tomorrow so that is good,I can not wait till I see the doctor next Wed,cause I need to talk to him,this is getting to much for one person to handle. Any suggestions that has helped others,please let me know. I am going to relax till I go to bed. Taking care of myself tonight. HUGS to you all. :plant:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Sun Aug 22, 2010 3:20 pm

:wavey: I am doing alot better than I have been. Even though the urges of self-harm is there,I hav been fighting it alot.I need to increase my coping skills more than I have been. I know that the nights and weekends are hard for me. I just need some more ideals from other people how they cope when things get real hard to deal with. I see the doctor this wed at program and I will see what he does. I have not done any self-harm this weekend,so that is great.I write in my journal,color and do word finds.I like to walk,but it is raining outside right now. I just feel lonely and I wish I had a pen pal to write to. I am glad that I came back to here,cause this place really helps me alot. I am taking myself out for dinner today,going to Wendy's,so that will be nice.So if anyone has any suggestions for me that has helped them,please let me know. I have been dealing with alot right now and I just need to get myself back on track. I am going to enjoy the day and relax,which I need to do right now. HUGS to you all :B-fly:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Tue Aug 24, 2010 11:03 pm

I am doing alright. I am just taking it one day at a time right now.I see the doctor tomorrow at program and to let him know what is going on with me. I just feel lonely and depressed right now,but I have been keeping myself busy today which helps me alot. I took a walk and wrote in my journal. No SI so far and that is great. I need to find a hobby or something that will help distract my thought more,so I am not here stitting here all the time. I have no one to hang around with,so that is making it harder for me to get out. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. If anyone has any suggestions please let me know. I just want to feel better,and I know that it will take time,but it does get frustrated at times. I hope that someone replies on this thread,cause I feel like I lost my interest in what I doing that I enjoy,cause I am dealing with grief right now and that is hard to deal with. I will be alright and going to enjoy the rest of the night :hamster: . HUGS to you all.
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Sat Aug 28, 2010 3:45 am

I need to write more coping skills here for myself,and to help others as well. I know that I slip with SI last night and I am dealing with what caused me to do it,but writing it out,which help me alot. I need to work on finding more coping skills that will help to distract myself and keep myself busy when the urges are strong. The only news that I have heard about my friend that has lung cancer is that she is not doing good,we were close friends and I miss her dearly. I wrote in my journal today and that helped me alot and I went out to lunch with a friend. I had a great time. If anyone has any suggestions on distraction coping skills that has helped them,let me know,cause it might help me as well. I am watching t.v right now and then eventually I will go to bed. I have not done any SI tonight and that is great. :lpurpheart: I am just feeling lonely right now and I need to work on being around positive people to help me bring me up instead of being brought down. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I will be just fine.going to take care of myself tonight and every day. HUGS :lblheart:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Stawberry_Lollipops
spiffy maximus
spiffy maximus
Posts: 4326
Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2009 6:39 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Australia

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Stawberry_Lollipops » Sun Aug 29, 2010 2:25 pm

Hi there Candy :)

Some :1hug:'s & some :1flwrs: to cheer you up a little.

Have you had a peek at the scarily vast list of coping strategies here.
It has ALOT of different ways of distracting yourself when your feeling urgy.

Have you tried the fifteen minute game? The idea is not to tell yourself you can't SI but rather say that if you still want to SI in fifteen minutes or an hour (whatever variation you want) then you can, if you can mange fifteen minutes, then try and go for another 15 minutes until the urge to SI subsides.

What about writing out a list of reasons not to SI or heading over to before & after and attempting the before questions there?

Other things I like to do to distract myself is listen to music, take a hot shower, do a word search puzzle, read a book or play a game on the computer,

Hope something in this post helps. Please try and look after yourself hun :bfly:

:dkpurpstar: Ness :dkpurpstar:
~ My Place ~


"Rejoice in our suffering, suffering produces perserverance, perserverance - character and character hope"

* ~ * ~ * ~ *


“There is no use trying,” said Alice; “One can’t believe impossible things!”
“I dare say you haven’t had much practise,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day
Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” - Lewis Carroll


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to the difference.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Sun Aug 29, 2010 6:04 pm

:wavey: Thanks for the nice messages. I have looked at the site with all of the coping skills and alot of them I plan on trying. I do need to try making a list of things that caused me to do SI and reason why I do it,so I can figure out my triggers. I liked the ideas that you mention,even the one about the fifteen minutes and I like to do word finds and coloring helps me alot.I already took a walk today and then I am going out for dinner later on.I was going to get myself a calendar and put stickers on it when I do not do SI. I also write in a journal which I will do later on. Thanks for your support and the helpful advice that you gave me.I have not done any SI for three days now and that is great,so I am taking it one day at a time. I just need to get out and get a calendar for myself,before the year ends. I hope you have a great day and again thanks. you can write to me by pm anytime you would like. I am going to enjoy the day and taking care of myself. Yes,I am going to go over and get the before and after questions. I will make a copy of them. Again thanks. HUGS :1flwrs:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Thu Sep 02, 2010 2:17 am

I am doing alright. I have not done any SI since last Thursday night and it has not been easy for me. I started writing in my journal at home and I need to get back into using my coping skills again. The doctor at program is in the hospital so they are looking for a new doctor. They told me to stop by on Friday and I can pick up a new prescprition,if I spell that right,for my clonapazem. I will be getting a month supply to last me and my other medications have a month supply on it. It has been really hard over there with out a doctor,but they will get a new one for us. I am watching t.v and relaxing for the night. I will probably color later on before I go to bed. I am feeling anxious,but I will start doing deep breathing,it does help me alot. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. They have a doctor coming in Friday to write out prescritions for the clients that need it,but he is not seeing anyone at this point. I just need to take better care of myself and do things that make me feel better,but it is not always easy when I start feeling down. I will be alright. taking care of myself.HUGS to you all.
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Stawberry_Lollipops
spiffy maximus
spiffy maximus
Posts: 4326
Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2009 6:39 pm
Gender: Female
Location: Australia

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Stawberry_Lollipops » Sun Sep 05, 2010 1:29 pm

Hi Candy :1hug:

I think a list of causes and reasons not to SI is a good idea and will be a useful tool for you. I quite like your idea of the calendar and marking all the days you don't give into SI. Maybe after every week of not SI-ing you could reward yourself in some way? Like, buy yourself a nice gift or treat yourself to your favourite dinner for example. Just something to work towards and motivate yourself to keep away from SI.

With the anxiety...do you have a stress ball? I find these really useful to hang on to/squeeze when I’m feeling really in edge and anxious.

Congrats on not SI-ing since Thursday...how are you doing now?
Good luck with all the medications and that, hope it all gets sorted promptly.

Take care and lots of :1hug:'s for you

:dkpurpstar: Ness :dkpurpstar:
~ My Place ~


"Rejoice in our suffering, suffering produces perserverance, perserverance - character and character hope"

* ~ * ~ * ~ *


“There is no use trying,” said Alice; “One can’t believe impossible things!”
“I dare say you haven’t had much practise,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day
Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” - Lewis Carroll


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to the difference.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Sun Sep 05, 2010 9:52 pm

Thanks for the nice reply.Yes,I do have a stress ball. I am having a rough time right now,but I am hanging in there.NO,I have not done any SI so far and that is good. I had a terrible time Thursday night and I wrote it separate from this page. Please read it. Thanks so much. HUGS to you all
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Sat Sep 11, 2010 3:23 am

I am hanging in there tonight,keeping myself busy,cause I am feeling lonely. NO SI and that is great. I have not seen a doctor for about 4 months and hopefully we will have one Tuesday,so I can get my presp.for my medications. I did not write in my journal today,cause I was having chest pains due to the anxiety that I have been feeling. I have been coloring which is helping me alot. I hope we get a doctor soon,it is getting to much for me and alot of other clients there. I am going to be alright,I just need to relax and not let anything get to me tonight. I just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. I am going to enjoy the weekend and not worry about anything,which is not always easy for me. I am proud of myself for not doing any SI,and that is great. If anyone has any suggestions of coping skills that I could try,please post here. I think I need to try something new,but I am not sure what yet. I am going to take care of myself and learn to relax. HUGS to you all. :1flwrs:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

User avatar
Candy
orange smartie
orange smartie
Posts: 1802
Joined: Sat Apr 29, 2006 4:37 pm
Gender: female
Location: New York

Re: Candys Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Sat Apr 16, 2011 6:46 pm

I know that I have not been on for a long time. I am sorry about that.I am doing pretty good. I am still fighting SI and now that my program has a DBT group,it has helped me alot. I also dealing with health issues of diabetes,so that is not always easy to deal with. I am still writing and using my coping skills that helped me alot. I hope everyone is doing alright. I am watching tv and relaxing. I love to walk,but the weather is not good today,it is raining outside. I am also writing and it has helped me alot. I just had a birthday this month,I am 46 years old now. I feel bad that I have not been on,but there has been so much going on lately,that has kept me away from things. I had trouble getting on,cause I had to reset my password,so it took me awhile to get that fixed with the computer. I have been busy lately,mainly my weekdays are busy. So I will stay in touch with everyone. Love to you all. :1couch:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 109 guests