what's your anti-si?
horses
music
sudoku
brother
my inspiration, aspiration, and desire to suceed and learn- cheesy, but true in every way
music
sudoku
brother
my inspiration, aspiration, and desire to suceed and learn- cheesy, but true in every way
The lightning and the thunder
They go and they come
But the stars and the stillness
Are always at home.
<a href="http://www.fastweb.com/ib/aff-1f/6NP98A4H90UNCJF" title="FastWeb: Scholarships, Financial Aid and Colleges" target="blank"><img></a>
They go and they come
But the stars and the stillness
Are always at home.
<a href="http://www.fastweb.com/ib/aff-1f/6NP98A4H90UNCJF" title="FastWeb: Scholarships, Financial Aid and Colleges" target="blank"><img></a>
My boyfriend
Memories of what I would have missed
- My friends babies christening
- Becoming a godmother
- seeing my best/friends baby
- my brothers good times
- laughing with friends and b/f
- my b/f hugs
Reading
Writing poetry
Good dreams and hopes
Memories of what I would have missed
- My friends babies christening
- Becoming a godmother
- seeing my best/friends baby
- my brothers good times
- laughing with friends and b/f
- my b/f hugs
Reading
Writing poetry
Good dreams and hopes
'Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life' Picasso
'IS THERE NO WAY OUT OF THE MIND?' Sylvia Plath
My Poetry
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=97459
My Place
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=97307
'IS THERE NO WAY OUT OF THE MIND?' Sylvia Plath
My Poetry
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=97459
My Place
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=97307
- Scatterbrain
- bus conductor
- Posts: 5074
- Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2005 3:17 am
- Location: Washington state, USA
As stupid as this sounds, my anti-si is my prom dress... My high school experience has been less than stellar so I want to have one night where I can forget about how screwed up it has been. I want one night where I dont have to hide. Thats in 4 months, so I cant afford to SI on my arms... I want the scars gone as much as possible by then...
~Megan
~Megan
"The impossible just takes a little longer."
- HCJ (1/9/25- 2/26/08 )
"That there, that's not me/I go where I please/I walk through walls/I float down the Liffey
I'm not here/This isn't happening"
- "How to Disappear Completely" Radiohead
Place: Want to live and breathe/I want to be part of the human race
PBH: Back to the basics
- HCJ (1/9/25- 2/26/08 )
"That there, that's not me/I go where I please/I walk through walls/I float down the Liffey
I'm not here/This isn't happening"
- "How to Disappear Completely" Radiohead
Place: Want to live and breathe/I want to be part of the human race
PBH: Back to the basics
- angelic212
- bus mechanic
- Posts: 3159
- Joined: Sun Jun 09, 2002 3:13 am
- Location: lost in the dark
- Contact:
- amber_lynne10
- meeting the neighbors
- Posts: 465
- Joined: Mon May 28, 2007 3:13 am
- Location: Ohio[Age:17]
- Contact:
My Anti-Si is...
Helping people. anyone really. seeing someone smile when i want to hurt myself makes me feel better. it makes me realize all i need to do is talk to someone and ill smile.
Helping people. anyone really. seeing someone smile when i want to hurt myself makes me feel better. it makes me realize all i need to do is talk to someone and ill smile.
Damaged People Are Dangerous... Because They Know They Can Survive.
I Want To Learn How To Take Pictures. The Kind You Take With A Camera Not The Kind My Head Takes. My Head Uses Real Expensive Film And The Pictures Are A Real Bitch To Develop.
Last SI:June 3.
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php? ... 69#2622269 <<<My Place
Visit my egg please(:
I Want To Learn How To Take Pictures. The Kind You Take With A Camera Not The Kind My Head Takes. My Head Uses Real Expensive Film And The Pictures Are A Real Bitch To Develop.
Last SI:June 3.
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php? ... 69#2622269 <<<My Place
Visit my egg please(:
- vampire_kisses
- meeting the neighbors
- Posts: 458
- Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2007 5:21 am
- Gender: Female
My anti-SI for a while was a friend who was SIing worse, and had no Idea of my SI (No one does) I wanted to help her so badly, I realized that I needed to help myself first, so I completely stopped. Then I once told her that her using her SI against me to force me to do things was really rough on me, she took it the wrong way, and told me i was dead to her.
Anti-SI gone,
SI back.
My other Anti-SI is scars, or people seeing them. I refrain from SI sometimes because I'm afraid of someone seeing them, and how I'd make up an excuse.
Anti-SI gone,
SI back.
My other Anti-SI is scars, or people seeing them. I refrain from SI sometimes because I'm afraid of someone seeing them, and how I'd make up an excuse.
- piano_life
- settling in
- Posts: 95
- Joined: Wed Apr 11, 2007 4:14 am
- faerie_rachie
- one of us
- Posts: 12
- Joined: Wed Jul 18, 2007 9:37 am
- Location: Worcestershire
- Contact:
At various times I have used these as my Anti Si - also enjoy they greatly so once I was over the wanting to Si it was my normal stuff to do.
*Call my mum or friends for a chat about random nothingness
*Go for a walk
*Painting
*Drawing
*Write in my book random plans poems etc
*Play computer games
*Go to gym (well used too, bit obsessivly)
*Dance about to some really loud heavy metal
*Read Books
*Yoga
*Tai Chi
*Call my mum or friends for a chat about random nothingness
*Go for a walk
*Painting
*Drawing
*Write in my book random plans poems etc
*Play computer games
*Go to gym (well used too, bit obsessivly)
*Dance about to some really loud heavy metal
*Read Books
*Yoga
*Tai Chi
Wishing you all
Love and Light :O) and :OD
Rachie
xXxXx
Love and Light :O) and :OD
Rachie
xXxXx
to treesleeper and others likeminded
is it really a good idea to wear bracelets when the urges surface? In my experience, they just allow an opportunity... the equivalent of long sleeves that start at the wrist.
- bellamuerte
- creating your space
- Posts: 198
- Joined: Wed Jul 04, 2007 8:58 pm
- Contact:
my anti-si
*talkin to a friend on the phone about anything!
*my lil bro Caleb
*listening to Smashing Pumpkins
*writing out lyrics (this really helps me, my comp is chock of em!)
* watchin a funny film wit my older bro..his laff is uber contagious!!
* looking at my older scars
* lying on my hands and falling asleep works for me too
*talkin to a friend on the phone about anything!
*my lil bro Caleb
*listening to Smashing Pumpkins
*writing out lyrics (this really helps me, my comp is chock of em!)
* watchin a funny film wit my older bro..his laff is uber contagious!!
* looking at my older scars
* lying on my hands and falling asleep works for me too
And I still believe that I cannot be saved.
- Librariana
- building community
- Posts: 569
- Joined: Thu Aug 02, 2007 12:29 am
- Location: Southern California
Wow. I'm glad I saw this one today. I'm having a hard time right now. My sponsor and I had a deal going for a while, and it became the longest time I ever went without cutting myself...fifteen days. I called her every day, and we'd go through the 'pain scale': how much emotional turmoil am I in today and what is the number, 0-10? At what number do I start to get edgy? We discovered that I always called her when it got to around six and I was getting angsty. Then we'd pray together and I'd promise not to hurt myself for at least twelve hours, until the next day, when I could call her again. We did that every day, and kept putting off my SI day by day. If I had the promise of release within twelve hours, I could wait. Then I'd just renew the promise.
BUT...she's been unavailable for the last few days due to work. And I just got back from a 'vacation' to my mother's house and coming back to the same crap I left behind, only worse, is not doing me any favors. I'm a running wreck on wheels.
I love the idea of an emergency box. I used to paint on canvas with acrylics; I can't really paint, but I do 'impressionist' paintings (read: they look like crap! ) of things like sunsets and starscapes. I'd listen to Van Halen at Extremely High Decibels and just let my hands go to work. Maybe I need to get back to that. I have an empty plastic tub and the art supply store is just a few blocks away.
I actually started crying when I read that post...written way back in 2002. The very idea of something I can run to made me feel so much better I can't tell you. I always feel like I'm running away; to have something to run to is so much better. Thank you so much!
And...there are always sugar free popsicles. I've eaten eight so far today. That's a record. I'm not feeling safe enough to get off the computer right now, but as soon as my son gets home, I'm going to take him with me to the art supply store and get started on my box. For now, I'm going to hang around here and read posts and maybe play a little bubblefish bob.
This place really gives me hope. I'm so glad I landed here.
BUT...she's been unavailable for the last few days due to work. And I just got back from a 'vacation' to my mother's house and coming back to the same crap I left behind, only worse, is not doing me any favors. I'm a running wreck on wheels.
I love the idea of an emergency box. I used to paint on canvas with acrylics; I can't really paint, but I do 'impressionist' paintings (read: they look like crap! ) of things like sunsets and starscapes. I'd listen to Van Halen at Extremely High Decibels and just let my hands go to work. Maybe I need to get back to that. I have an empty plastic tub and the art supply store is just a few blocks away.
I actually started crying when I read that post...written way back in 2002. The very idea of something I can run to made me feel so much better I can't tell you. I always feel like I'm running away; to have something to run to is so much better. Thank you so much!
And...there are always sugar free popsicles. I've eaten eight so far today. That's a record. I'm not feeling safe enough to get off the computer right now, but as soon as my son gets home, I'm going to take him with me to the art supply store and get started on my box. For now, I'm going to hang around here and read posts and maybe play a little bubblefish bob.
This place really gives me hope. I'm so glad I landed here.
Be patient. 36 years is a long time to keep a secret.
It's official! The parts have finally arrived and I am now a complete moron.
It's official! The parts have finally arrived and I am now a complete moron.
i have an emergency box. it's actually something we did in DBT group therapy, called a mindfulness box. you put in one thing that appeals to each of your senses. i put in prints of degas's ballerina sketches for sight; i think they're lovely. for smell, i put in a little bag of chinese herbs my grandmother sent me that remind me of my cousins in china. for sound, i put in a small, silver bell - one of the only non-annoying ones i've ever found. for taste i have cremesaver candies. and for touch, i have my teddy bear. he was small enough to fit in the box, and i love to cuddle with him. the outside of the box is red, and i drew stars and a butterfly on it with sharpie. i haven't thought about it in a while. it's sitting in the corner of my room. but this has made me want to pull it out and go through it . . .
i also want to get fingerpaints.
aside from my box, i
-listen to music
-play with sidewalk chalk
-sleep, wrapped up in my blanket
-talk to my friends
and write!!!
i also want to get fingerpaints.
aside from my box, i
-listen to music
-play with sidewalk chalk
-sleep, wrapped up in my blanket
-talk to my friends
and write!!!
- fallen4u_ds
- building community
- Posts: 518
- Joined: Sat Jul 07, 2007 3:00 am
- Location: West Virginia
- Contact:
That box idea is really neat.
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php? ... highlight=
My place
Dustin Dougherty 11-19-07
Always and forever in my heart, I miss you.
"D-train"
1,372 miles to the one I love <3
*.:.*Brittany Nicole*.:.*
My place
Dustin Dougherty 11-19-07
Always and forever in my heart, I miss you.
"D-train"
1,372 miles to the one I love <3
*.:.*Brittany Nicole*.:.*
- Librariana
- building community
- Posts: 569
- Joined: Thu Aug 02, 2007 12:29 am
- Location: Southern California
IT WORKED!! I can't believe it! Sorry, I don't normally shout, but I have four days without an episode, and I was not feeling right yesterday. My son and I went to the art store and got a bunch of stuff for my emergency box. About 11 pm, when I couldn't take it anymore, I dragged the box out from under the bed and started drawing. I decided to draw what it was I wanted to do. It's a pretty nasty drawing, and I don't think it's something I'd take out and pass around at a party or anything, but I made it through the night intact. And judging from how I was feeling yesterday, that's a miracle.
Now I'm scared it won't work again.
But at least for now, I'd say the emergency box, and thank you a million times to the OP for that idea, is a definite anti-si.
(Plus, my therapist, whom I saw for the second time today, was -extremely- impressed. But I'm pretty good at snowing the docs. )
Now I'm scared it won't work again.
But at least for now, I'd say the emergency box, and thank you a million times to the OP for that idea, is a definite anti-si.
(Plus, my therapist, whom I saw for the second time today, was -extremely- impressed. But I'm pretty good at snowing the docs. )
Be patient. 36 years is a long time to keep a secret.
It's official! The parts have finally arrived and I am now a complete moron.
It's official! The parts have finally arrived and I am now a complete moron.
- Underoath
- creating your space
- Posts: 163
- Joined: Fri Jul 20, 2007 7:27 am
- Location: Somewhere in my private little hell
- Contact:
I have a specific journal which I write/draw in about my SI. sometimes just reading what I allready wrote, and seeing the blood in my book helps me.
"my legs are dangling off the edge" - Hollywood undead
--------------------------------------------------------
You walk around screaming "screw the world" cause that's easier then actually feeling anything. - Carmen
*Pm's welcome*
--------------------------------------------------------
You walk around screaming "screw the world" cause that's easier then actually feeling anything. - Carmen
*Pm's welcome*
- kittyfever
- driving instructor
- Posts: 5546
- Joined: Fri Dec 29, 2006 4:54 am
- Location: In the corner
- vampirelover
- spiffy maximus
- Posts: 4149
- Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2007 8:45 pm
- Gender: F
- Location: London ish(England), age : 21
feeling angry
elastic bands (there i life savour)
typing violetly
throwing ice against walls
scream
kicking footballs
bouncing tennis balls
feeling lonely
get a hug (virtual or real)
talk online
ring a friend
go on msn
go into a busy street
drink hot cocco and read a book
feeling sad
cry (its good to get it all out)
try and think posative
watch a really happy movie
listen to upbeat poppy music (like Aqua )
need the sight of blood
look at old scars (may trigger you)
wear red
elastic bands (there i life savour)
typing violetly
throwing ice against walls
scream
kicking footballs
bouncing tennis balls
feeling lonely
get a hug (virtual or real)
talk online
ring a friend
go on msn
go into a busy street
drink hot cocco and read a book
feeling sad
cry (its good to get it all out)
try and think posative
watch a really happy movie
listen to upbeat poppy music (like Aqua )
need the sight of blood
look at old scars (may trigger you)
wear red
longest with no slips - 2 years , 6 months
time since last slip : 2 days
time since last slip : 2 days
- Quiet little Angel
- just plain inspiring
- Posts: 7754
- Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2005 2:10 pm
- Location: somewhere between blue tulips and anxiety...
- swimming
- pianoplaying
- BUS
- pianoplaying
- BUS
/May
Never underestimate the power of silence...
micro-chipped mental cyber twins taking over NewZealand...
ever reached out for someones hand only to find it wasn't there?
My place of happy-scared-random-thoughts dealing with motherhood and anxiety, visitors welcome
Never underestimate the power of silence...
micro-chipped mental cyber twins taking over NewZealand...
ever reached out for someones hand only to find it wasn't there?
My place of happy-scared-random-thoughts dealing with motherhood and anxiety, visitors welcome
- xunwrittenx
- sprouting branches
- Posts: 1170
- Joined: Wed Aug 01, 2007 10:06 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: USA age: 25
- Contact:
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