Candys Coping Thread

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Mar 26, 2007 4:32 am

My boy-friend had left and I am watching t.v.,and I will be going to bed soon,cause I have to get up early to go to program in the morning. I do not feel anxious at all. I took my medication for the night and I feel alot better. I know that I did not write in my journal or do any coloring tonight,but I promise that I will work on it tomorrow. I have been using my coping skills and it has helped me alot. I had urges of doing SI earlier,but I kept myself busy talking to my boy-friend and it helped me alot.Dealing with uncomfortable emotions and feeling are not easy for me,but I dealing with them the best I can. I am hanging in there and doing the best I can. I will be back on the bus tomorrow evening. I am going to get a good night sleep. taking it easy :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Mar 26, 2007 1:25 pm

I just woke up and I am getting ready to go prorgam,I am getting frustrated with my boy-friend, I am trying to lose weight and I told him,not to bring snacks over here,cause I will eat them,and he continues to do so,I do love him and I know he loves me,he tells me that they are for him,but when I tell him to stop bringing the snacks over here,he does anyway. I do not know what to do about this situation. I have told him over again,but he does not listen. I am getting frustrated and angry and I do not know what to do. I am doing good otherwise,just trying to get ready,I am proud of myself for not doing any SI. I have to get going now and I will be back on the bus later when I get home. I going to have a great day,cause I deserve it. I am taking care of myself. Any suggestions,please let me know. hanging in there. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Mar 26, 2007 7:11 pm

I am came home from program early,cause I have a headache and I am feeling tired. I am doing pretty good so far,just tired. I still have the urges of doing S1,but I keep fighting it,and it is not easy. There are sometimes that I feel alone,like there is no one that understands my problem and I hate that. It is the way that I am feeling right now. I wish there were more groups where I live that deal with SI and Borderline Personality Disorder,but I do not know of any. I just feel alone inside and that is scaring for me,and not to able to feel any good emotions is other thing that I do not like, I want to change that as well,but I do not know where to start. I am going to go lay down for awhile and take it easy. I will be back on the bus later,promise :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Mar 26, 2007 9:37 pm

I just woke up from a nap,what I do not like is going to sleep with a headache,and waking up with one.I am doing pretty good. It is soo hard not to do SI,but when I feel the urges coming on,that is when I use my coping skills,but there are somedays that are harder then the next. I am going to watch t.v.,and wake up. It has been raining here alot,which makes me more tired than usual. The verbal abuse that I have received by my mother and past abuse,has affected my self-esteem so much,that I have to work on my self-esteem,to get it back.Does anyone know of a good website that deal with self-esteem,cause I need to feel good about myself and to like myself. If anyone knows of one,could you please let me know. Thanks alot. I am going to relax and take it easy for awhile. I will be back on the bus later,promise :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Mon Mar 26, 2007 11:35 pm

I am watching t.v.,and playing checkers and of course I am not winning.I am doing pretty good. I am doing good with my SI,and it does get hard sometimes,but I am trying very hard.I fight the urges and it is never easy. I have off of program tomorrow and it will give me time to do things that I like to do. I get scared sometimes,cause I never know when the urges are going to get to strong or I start to dissocate,if I spell that word right,and that scares me as well. Has anyone felt this way,and I do not know how to handle it.I am going to watch t.v and relax;plus try not think about any negative thoughts or emotions that I am feeling inside. I am going to keep myself busy no matter what and keep myself safe,cause that is what I need to do for myself right now.I am hanging in there and doing the best I can.I am going to watch t.v and I will be back on the bus later on. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Tue Mar 27, 2007 4:47 am

I am doing pretty good. My boy-friend just left and I am watching t.v.,and I will be going to bed real soon. I have the day off tomorrow and I have some cleaning to do and I plan on doing positive things for myself,not sure at this point,but I have a few good ideals.I did not do any SI today,and even though it has been over a week,it is still on my mind and I think about it,but I have not acted on it,it has not been easy for me,and there are times that it is sooo hard for me,but I get through it. I am trying very hard not to think about it,but it is not easy for me. I already took my medication for the night and I am getting tired. I hope everyone has a great night and I will do the same. Just hanging in there and I will be back on the bus tomorrow sometime. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Tue Mar 27, 2007 2:30 pm

I am having a good morning so far,I am cleaning my apartment and when I am finished,I am doing to do something pleasant for myself,like writing in my journal and coloring,even if I have to punsh myself somewhat. I had a great night sleep and I promise myself that today that I was going to do something helpful for me. I hope everyone had a great night sleep. It is my day off and I am going to make the best of it and take care of myself for a change. I am some more cleaning to do and I will be back on the bus later on,promise :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Post by plantt » Tue Mar 27, 2007 2:52 pm

glad you slept well :)

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Tue Mar 27, 2007 7:09 pm

I am doing pretty good. I got done cleaning my apartment,and my nurse left,did my medications. I am sitting here watching t.v. and I am going to go for a walk afterwards,it is real nice outside. I have not written in my journal today or did any coloring,which I need to do,feel kind of anxious right now,and trying to keep my mind focus on other things then my anxiety or the urges of SI,it is not easy,but I am trying very hard. I will use my coping skills and keep my thoughts on other things right now. I am going to go and watch t.v and take care of myself. I will be back later on. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Post by angelic212 » Tue Mar 27, 2007 10:26 pm

here are some coloring pages for you! i hope you like them. they are for you to print and color

<a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h314/ ... rheart.gif" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a><a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h314/ ... mebear.gif" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a><a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h314/ ... loring.jpg" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a><a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h314/ ... alloon.gif" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a><a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h314/ ... Kitty1.gif" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a><a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h314/ ... kitty4.gif" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a><a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h314/ ... gician.gif" border="0" alt="Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket"></a>

im going to make myself a homemade coloring book. maybe you can do the same?
i think it would be fun

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Mar 28, 2007 12:29 am

I am doing pretty good. I was thinking the same thing about coloring and I agree I think it would be great ideal. I still have not written in my journal or coloring,it is not that I do not want to,I have been soo busy for the past couple of days,besides not feeling well,and doing other things that I have not had a chance to,I have not done any SI,for over a week,and I am proud of myself,but there are times that it is not easy for me. Thanks so much for the pictures,I love them!!!!!!!!!! I am sitting her watching t.v. with my boy-friend and we are having a great time. I took my medication and I am feeling better,still feeling anxious,but not as bad as I was before. I have to go to program tomorrow,but I will be back on the later on. I hanging in there and doing the best I can. Again thanks for the pictures. :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Mar 28, 2007 4:10 am

I am doing pretty good,my boy-friend,just left and I am getting ready to go to bed pretty soon. I already took my medication for the night. I do feel bad,,cause I did not get to write in my journal or color like I planned,besides being busy here,and spending time with my boy-friend I did not get a chance to do what I want to do. I feel bad about that,but I did not do any SI,which is very positive thing,but I do feel bad though. It is 11:00 am here and it is getting late,so I am getting tired,that I do not feel up to it. I have program tomorrow,so I will be back on the bus later on in the evening. I had a pretty good day and that is a good thing.I feel alot calmer than I did earlier,so I feel more relax. I am going to go and watch t.v,till I go to bed. I am hanging in there and doing the best I can. I will be back on tomorrow evening. :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Mar 28, 2007 8:46 pm

I just got home from program and I had a great day. I also went for a walk and it helped me alot. It felt great to get outside and walk the anxiety off. I also had a great day at program and that went well. I am doing pretty good and I am going to go lay down for awhile and take it easy. I got a gift in the mail from a friend and she send me a birthday gift and I know it was early,but she doesn't live near me,so she wants to make sure I get it before my birhtday,which is Easter Sunday on the 8th. It was a nice gift,maining bath gels and stuff like that.I am hanging in there and doing the best I can. I made it another day without doing any SI,and I feel proud of myself. I am tired and the waking helped alot with that. I will be back on the bus later,promise,sorry if I repeated myself. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Wed Mar 28, 2007 11:34 pm

I finally woke up from my nap,and I was tired from walking. I am sitting here watching t.v with my boy-friend and waking up,that walk helped me alot with my anxiety and my stress that I have been feeling inside lately. I did write in my journal last night,even though it was late,I did write some,it is hard for me to write when I have company. I am doing pretty good,just have dry mouth today and nothing seems to be working,I know it has to do with my medications,but today it just got to me. I am hanging in there and doing the best I can. I am going to go and watch t.v. I will be back on the bus later,promise :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Thu Mar 29, 2007 3:00 am

I am just relaxing and watching t.v.,I am feeling pretty good,just feeling some anxiety,but not that bad. I took my medication for the night and hopefully I will write in my journal tonight,if it is not to late.I still have thoughts of SI,but I have not acted on the urges or the feelings of doing so,it has not been easy,and I find out that walking has helped me alot today.I wanted to let everyone know how I am doing,and I have program tomorrow,I will be back on the bus before I go to bed,taking care of myself right now. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Thu Mar 29, 2007 4:19 am

My boy-friend left and I am watching t.v and I wrote in my journal which I need to do right now. I am dealing with something that is bothering me,how do I get the feeling of trust back in myself again. It has been over a week since I last did SI,and even though I feel proud of myself,how do I trust myself again,if it doesn't make sense I am sorry about that,but it is the way I am feeling inside right now.I was feeling anxious when I came home,and the walk helped and writing in my journal and that helped me alot,but the feelings of not trusting myself with SI,is scaring me,and I do not like that feeling. I do not know what to do,I have been keeping myself safe and it is working,but the feeling of not trusting myself is a horrible feeling to have.If anyone has any suggestions you can post them here. I took my medication for the night and I will be going to bed real soon. I have program tomorrow and I will be back on the bus later on in the evening. I learned alot today at program.I am hanging in there and doing the best I can do.Going to watch t.v. for awhile.I hope everyone has a great night and I will be back on tomorrow sometime. :bcatsmile:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Post by plantt » Thu Mar 29, 2007 5:14 am

sometimes going to bed is a very good option.
whether or not you think you have control over hurting yourself.... you *do*....
regardless of what you label yourself as or use as an excuse... it is a choice.
often a veryvery hard one.
one that is painful & aches & is awful to get through.....
the more you hurt yourself the harder it'll be to fully stop.....
i hope you do manage to go to bed & not hurt yourself :)

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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Thu Mar 29, 2007 5:18 am

Thanks for your messages. I do not plan on doing any SI,it is the thoughts and the urges that are really getting to me and that is when I feel like I can not trust myself. I am planning on going to bed real soon. I am doing really good it is just the way I feel right now,before the urges get to strong,sorry if I wrote that wrong in my last post. Again thanks for messages. I will be back on tomorrow evening. :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Candy
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Candy's Coping Thread

Post by Candy » Thu Mar 29, 2007 12:47 pm

I want to check in and let everyone know how I am doing. I sleep good last night and think I mention that I wrote in my journal as well. I am getting ready for program,cause I leave here at 8:30am in the morning. I got through the night without doing any SI,and I am proud of myself. I feel somewhat anxious,but not as bad as I was last night.When I get home I will either go for a walk or take a nap,it depends on how tired I am. I am hanging in there and doing the best I can.At least the sun is out side,which it makes me feel better. I will be back on the bus later on sometime. hanging in there :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

plantt
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Post by plantt » Thu Mar 29, 2007 12:52 pm

glad you've been remembering to write in your journal & that you slept well last night!
hope today goes well for you :)

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