Can not deal with emotions or feelings

[Candy]

I got a new therapist and I feel she does not understand my illness which is Borderline Personality,I go to a day treatment program,and the things she says to me,is making me feel like SH,cause I have been having panic attacks and she feels it is better to have them instead doing SH. I was so angry and hurt by what she said to me,I know she can not change my behavior,that is something that I need to work on,but she is not listening to me,and she is making it hard on me. I told her boss about it cause this is the second time it happen and he is going to talk to her. I was not trying to get her in to trouble,but I can not deal with all these emotions and feelings that are bothering me,due to my illness,I know that it is a behavior thing,but she could of been supportive and more understanding,instead of making me feel like I am going to always slip with SH. I feel like and I feel more anxious then I did before I met with her. I am so tired and I just do not what to do anything but sleep,I am not sure if it is cause I am getting anxious or I am depressed,cause my old therapist left. I just do not feel like I should have to eduacate her on my illness,she should do it her self. Maybe I am wrong for feeling this way,but it is how I feel. I am trying so hard and it is getting me worn out.I just want the anxiety to go away and the illness to go away,cause it is getting on my nerves. Iam sorry if I am going on,I just needed to vent. Anyone has any good methods for dealing with panic attacks and I am the only one who has Borderline Personality Disorder,cause that is how I feel. I need to know that someone cares and that I am not alone. You are welcome to PM me,if you like or write to me on the bus.Still looking for Hello Kitty pictures or butterflies,and dolphins.Just taking it one minute at a time. Thanks for being there for me.

[one out of none]

Hi Candy,
I know things are hard to deal with at the moment. But I understand how you are feeling, and you are not alone. It's a pity that you are having a difficult relationship with your T, maybe it will get a little better after you told her manager person how you were feeling about it all. Keep trying to take it a day at a time, like you say, and I hope that it gets better for you really soon.

You say that you like butterflies and dolphins and hello kitty. Here are some pictures for you.

<a href="http://photobucket.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://i146.photobucket.com/albums/r243 ... OQUOMZ.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting"></a> <a href="http://photobucket.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://i146.photobucket.com/albums/r243 ... SSAXTI.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting"></a> <a href="http://photobucket.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://i146.photobucket.com/albums/r243 ... H436QH.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting"></a> <a href="http://photobucket.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://i146.photobucket.com/albums/r243 ... B5QSUF.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting"></a>

(if you want bigger versions of those or anything, I can PM them to you.)

[abbyfornow]

I understand the therapist issue. My counselor is great, but I went to a psych for medicine, and he in no way what so ever understood Di. Yet, know this, that we understand and you can come to anytime to talk.

[half/hearted]

Oh honey...you aren't wrong for wanting your doc to understand your illness. It's their job to help us, not to make us more anxious. I would hope that most Ts and Pdocs understand that you just can't make someone stop using one coping mechanism until they have others.

On that note...things that help me deal with panic attacks:

counting breaths - I can't just take deep breaths, but if I count them, they often fall into a rhythm and it helps me calm down.

I couldn't find a Hello Kitty I really liked, so I drew one for you...hope it's ok