Can't handle it anymore

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Candy
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Can't handle it anymore

Post by Candy » Fri Feb 09, 2007 5:06 pm

I am soo sick of these panic attacks and the problem is that I want to SH and I am trying soo hard not too,which is increasing the panic attacks,and dealing with Borderline Personality Disorder is not easy for me and I do not know anyone else that has this disorders. I feel so alone and it is scaring me.I feel like my heart is going so fast and it will not slow down. Does anyone have any coping skills that work for them,that might help me. My therapist wants me to cope with this on my own,and it is sooo hard,they think that I can deal with this,but it is getting so rough for me.I am trying to handle this on my own,but I am soo tired of this. The urge to do SH is strong which is not helping the anxiety at all. I like Hello Kitty and butterflies and angels,in case anyone wants to send me a picture of them,cause I am making a scape work,but that is up to you.I still have not add anything to my coping box and I am having a hard time there,plus when I feel so anxious I have a hard time doing anything,cause I can not focus or relax,I am afraid that I might slip again and I do not want that to happen,and I need help from people here. You are weclome to PM if you want or write to me on the bus. Just hanging in there. :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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Post by plantt » Sat Feb 10, 2007 4:01 am

hey Candy :)
sounds like it's been a tough time for you lately....
do you think it'd help to start a "Coping Place?"... maybe keeping all your thoughts together would let you go back through & see what the main problem areas are... & what you find useful in terms of coping & what you don't...
I know at least one other person who has one & she finds it helpful...

what do you have in your coping box currently?

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Candy
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hi

Post by Candy » Sat Feb 10, 2007 4:12 am

It has not been a easy day for me,the anxiety has been so high that I have been crying :cry:. What is the coping space? I have not decided what to keep in my coping box yet,I am not sure. I like dolphins,butterflies,cats and hello kitty. I just can not make up mind yet. Thanks for the nice letter,nights are hard for me and lately the days are to. I take my medications for anxiety,but it is not helping,my therapist told me that I will have to find ways to cope with it. I want to SH,and the anxiety gets worse when I want to,and I am trying so hard not to,that I am afraid of really slipping. I am so scared and I want the anxiety to go away for good.You are weclome to PM or write to me on the bus. I wish I could feel better and I am trying so hard,the anxiety makes it hard for me to do anything. Any suggestions for the coping box. I am just taking it one minute at a time. Wish I felt better. :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

plantt
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Post by plantt » Sat Feb 10, 2007 4:18 am

well... this is the coping forum... you could start Candys Coping Thread or something...

do you have stuff to do in your coping box? stuff to keep you distracted for awhile?

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Candy
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HI

Post by Candy » Sat Feb 10, 2007 4:29 am

I do not have any thing to put in my coping box at this point,any suggestions. I am trying to relax and I am having a hard time right now. I am going to try to watch t.v. and post on the bus tonight,so I will be on line on and off. It is not easy for me right now. You have some good ideals and you are helping me alot.It is not easy for me and it is scary when I am home alone even at night,cause that is when the urge to do SH is strong,that is why I post on the bus on alot.How do people put pictures on their post,having trouble with that. Just taking it one minute at a time. :microwave: Everyday is harder for me and I just want to cry :cry: you are weclome to PM,or write on the bus to me.Thanks :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

plantt
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Post by plantt » Sat Feb 10, 2007 4:36 am

watching tv sounds like a good plan. do you have favorite shows?
what do you think you could do after tv?

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Candy
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hi

Post by Candy » Sat Feb 10, 2007 4:55 am

I will probably play a game off line and try to write on the board that you were talking about,is there any words that I can not use? I do not want to do write something that would bother someone else.I am having a hard relaxing and night times is when I slip the most,so I have to keep myself busy till I get real tired. Any suggetions will be helpful for that board.This place is really helping me. Should I write out first what I want to put on that board,that you mention to me before. Just taking it one minute at a time. It is not getting any easier for me,even when i am alone. Thanks :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

plantt
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Post by plantt » Sat Feb 10, 2007 5:10 am

playing a game sounds good :) do you have favorite games?
i'll try & find a link to the other 'coping place' thread & maybe you'll get some ideas :)
do you have any pets, Candy?

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Post by plantt » Sat Feb 10, 2007 5:13 am

http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php? ... highlight= :) hopefully the link will work... i'm not always too good with computer stuff

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Candy
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hi

Post by Candy » Sat Feb 10, 2007 5:27 am

I feel so-so,my boy-friend went home,so I am by myself till I go to bed. I hope this night is better than last night,but I just want the anxiety to go away,and the urge to do SH,I do not know how to start with the post that you mention,and I am looking at the other one you sent me. You are weclome to Pm me if you feel uncomfortable. I would not have made it through the nights alone without posting on the bus,and even though I might repeat myself it has helped me alot,I just want the anxiety to go away for good.No, I do not have any pets,and where I live they do not allow any pets,that is hard,cause I love cats as well as Hello Kitty. When my boy-friend leaves the anxiety gets worse,he knows how I feel,but he has not been feeling well,he has a cold,he understands how I feel and he is there for me,just hate the nights and there are days that the anxiety is high as well. I hope you are doing good,and you are a good person.
Hope to hear from you soon.Thanks :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

plantt
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Post by plantt » Sat Feb 10, 2007 5:34 am

aww that sucks :( pictures of animals & all can be fun though :)

getting anxiety or depression or such to go away for good takes time & effort... unfortunately it's not something that goes away instantly.
can be tough to deal with.

any ideas what you're going to watch on tv?

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Candy
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hi

Post by Candy » Sat Feb 10, 2007 6:05 am

I am going to watch a comedy on t.v till I get tired and go to bed and you mention that people have their own coping thread,do you have any ideal how I can do,I might have mention that to you before,sorry if I did. I planning a game on the computer and watching t.v,probably Will and Grace.,it is funny. I will get through this night,cause I get so tired of feeling this way,and I want the stuff to stop,that is going on in my head,the thoughts of SH and the anxiety so I will feel better. The worst part of the anxiety is that it gets so bad that I feel like I am having a heart attack,and that is very scary.How are you doing? Here is a flower for you,for being there for me, :1flwrs: Just hanging in there. :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

plantt
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Post by plantt » Sat Feb 10, 2007 6:44 am

hmm you could start by mentioning things you like.... certain things on tv or movies or songs or characters.....
& things you're struggling with... diagnoses or symptoms or behaviors or nighttime or being alone....
ways that you usually use to cope with things....
how you're doing right now.... etc :)

i like comedies too :)
i like will & grace, standing still, king of queens... hehe they're fun :)

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Candy
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hi

Post by Candy » Sat Feb 10, 2007 7:11 am

That sounds like a great ideal,and I will write it out before I post them,so I know what I am writing. I just wanted to let you know that my anxiety is not soo high then it was before,and I just wanted to say thank-you for everything,if you have any more ideals,please let me know,as you know you can PM,anytime if you wish. I like the Golden Girls,and different comedys on Lifetime,some are Reba and Standing Still. You are giving me such great ideals that I did not think of before. I like relaxing tapes,with dolphins making their noises. It is getting late here and I am getting tired,but I will keep you posted on what is going on and I hope you are doing alright. I made it through the night without doing any SH and I am proud of myself, :bcatsmile: I hope to hear from you soon.Just taking it one minute at a time. Thanks :star:
I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.

To find yourself,think of yourself first.

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