tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.
Moderators: Spidey, noldo
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zombiepeople
- knows the ropes

- Posts: 4561
- Joined: Thu Jan 11, 2007 3:53 am
- Location: next to the spooky bus stop...i've never seen a bus there though...hmm
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Contact:
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by zombiepeople » Sat Jan 20, 2007 4:17 am
I love her, don't you understand!? I didn't choose to be this way, it's just how I am! It's just me!!

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Binayshee
- orange smartie

- Posts: 1719
- Joined: Wed Nov 22, 2006 3:02 am
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by Binayshee » Sat Jan 20, 2007 4:35 am
i was cleaning out documents from my desktop today and i saw an old conversation i'd saved and read it. i cried and i missed you.

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Aly
- beyond inspiring

- Posts: 9384
- Joined: Wed Nov 24, 2004 9:25 pm
- Location: South England
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by Aly » Sat Jan 20, 2007 11:31 pm
Why do you have to be like that?
Why? When it gives me not the least bit of a chance?
Why do you have to be so hidden and guarded with it and so...give so very few clues?
Seriously. Why?
It is so damn unfair when I like you this much 
The wind and I, we speak the same, but he don’t hear so well.
Well, you’re gonna have to curse him, well you’re gonna have to yell.
The sky and I, we’ve had our fights and I’m coming round to rain,
Well, if the rain come round and it don’t come out, then I’ll never have to speak again,
I can tick tick tick tick tick tick tick away.
If Heaven is as Heaven does then this is Hell for sure...
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mephistopheles
- cow control

- Posts: 24355
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- Location: London
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by mephistopheles » Sat Jan 20, 2007 11:35 pm
y'know what? i would fuck you again. the only reason i said no is because i haven't had a shower. and i can't because of stitches. that's the only thing that's saving me from you
“Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.”
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Seeshellz
- my other car is a bus

- Posts: 34295
- Joined: Tue May 18, 2004 1:51 am
- Location: Hiding in my shell...
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by Seeshellz » Sun Jan 21, 2007 12:17 am
I am hurting for you. What your parents put you through. What they are putting you through now!!!

And you take the anger out on yourself. You hurt yourself. I wish you would allow yourself to get angry at them? It's OK, they don't have to know about it. You could write your anger out and even burn the papers!! You could tell me about your anger or your therapist. Please, just please don't hurt yourself over the anger that should be directed at them!
"If you learn from your suffering,
and really come to understand the lesson you were taught,
you might be able to help someone else who's now
in the phase you may have just completed.
Maybe that's what it's all about after all..."
Anonymous
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acdcrocker1909
- forum moderator emeritus

- Posts: 10453
- Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 3:42 am
- Gender: Transguy
- Location: Little Blue dot in a sea of Red
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by acdcrocker1909 » Sun Jan 21, 2007 12:40 am
why do you have to make things so damned difficult? Can't you just let me become who I should be? Can't you let me figure out my place instead of forcing me into some social corner.. where the only thing I have is those that can see me hiding? I hate this.. and I hate myself more because of you.. can't you just let it be? Can't you just move on to something new? I knew them before you.. and yet now.. they choose you... because you're the "cool, popular, girly" one.. damnit I hate you.
It does not do to dwell on dreams, and forget to live - APWBD.
Music is life.. we each have our own symphony.. and we control it for the most part.. sometimes instruments drop out.. and others join in.. but when the music fades and the symphony is done.. then we have created a beautiful, personal piece. - Me.
Less Traveled Roads <-- Everyone Welcome.

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red umbrellas
- beyond inspiring

- Posts: 8175
- Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 8:50 am
- Location: Sydney
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by red umbrellas » Sun Jan 21, 2007 11:05 am
i wish you cared for me more.
i wish i was worth more.
It's all life and fire and lunacy
And excuses and excuses and excuses
Hold On To Yourself - Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
"We paint a picture of a scenario - and then we become afraid of it" - Andrea Fella
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Aly
- beyond inspiring

- Posts: 9384
- Joined: Wed Nov 24, 2004 9:25 pm
- Location: South England
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by Aly » Sun Jan 21, 2007 3:36 pm
I hate you having that avvy. It fills me with saddness whenever I see it. Saddness and anger.
The wind and I, we speak the same, but he don’t hear so well.
Well, you’re gonna have to curse him, well you’re gonna have to yell.
The sky and I, we’ve had our fights and I’m coming round to rain,
Well, if the rain come round and it don’t come out, then I’ll never have to speak again,
I can tick tick tick tick tick tick tick away.
If Heaven is as Heaven does then this is Hell for sure...
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LT
- growing roots

- Posts: 851
- Joined: Thu Feb 17, 2005 7:29 pm
- Location: Chester, England
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by LT » Sun Jan 21, 2007 7:47 pm
Wish i could snap out of this i feel like i'm losing everything,
I can't tell you how i am because if i do you'd be disappointed
I am an architect, they call me a butcher
I am a pioneer, they call me primitive
I am purity, they call me perverted
- Manic street preachers
I find it kinda funny, i find it kinda sad, the dreams in which i'm dying are the best i've ever had - Mad World
Your no good for me, I don't need nobody, don't need noone - The Prodigy
You'll never walk alone
My place -
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=106085 replies welcome
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Binayshee
- orange smartie

- Posts: 1719
- Joined: Wed Nov 22, 2006 3:02 am
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by Binayshee » Mon Jan 22, 2007 4:22 am
*edited*
Last edited by
Binayshee on Mon Jan 22, 2007 10:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Binayshee
- orange smartie

- Posts: 1719
- Joined: Wed Nov 22, 2006 3:02 am
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by Binayshee » Mon Jan 22, 2007 4:30 am
*edited*
Last edited by
Binayshee on Mon Jan 22, 2007 10:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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MusicalMorphine
- growing roots

- Posts: 819
- Joined: Wed Jul 19, 2006 5:51 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: Hastings, England
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by MusicalMorphine » Mon Jan 22, 2007 5:41 pm
I'm sick of everything, sick of being let down, but you're all I've got.
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ViolinPlayingGoat
- bus mechanic

- Posts: 3062
- Joined: Mon Mar 17, 2003 8:28 pm
- Location: MK, UK
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Contact:
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by ViolinPlayingGoat » Mon Jan 22, 2007 6:04 pm
i'm going to put this here for you.
i didn't want to do a big thing somewhere else, because i didn't really know you, so it would be kinda fake, and i don't think you'd like that.
i didn't know you well, but what i do remember is good.
i hope you've found yourself some peace now.
RIP

'cos i am a rocket on fire[[alone on its journey, home to the quickening ground with no-one there to catch it]]
-kate bush
You do it to yourself, you do, that's what really hurts,
you do it to yourself, just you, you and no-one else
{radiohead}
*~*happiness isn't happiness without a violin playing goat*~*
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Seeshellz
- my other car is a bus

- Posts: 34295
- Joined: Tue May 18, 2004 1:51 am
- Location: Hiding in my shell...
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by Seeshellz » Mon Jan 22, 2007 6:26 pm
P, thanks for talking me through this flashback, and finding me a solution to my problem.
And thanks M, for driving me there, instead of me walking, I'm now terrified because of the flashback to walk, afraid he'll get me, I know it doesn't make sense, but neither does PTSD, thank you so much..
"If you learn from your suffering,
and really come to understand the lesson you were taught,
you might be able to help someone else who's now
in the phase you may have just completed.
Maybe that's what it's all about after all..."
Anonymous
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Aly
- beyond inspiring

- Posts: 9384
- Joined: Wed Nov 24, 2004 9:25 pm
- Location: South England
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by Aly » Mon Jan 22, 2007 8:52 pm
I'm sorry Mummy. I am so so so sorry. And I love you. I absolutely do. I love you so much, and I am so very sorry for...a while back. I wish I could say I didn't mean any of what I felt and thought then. But I did. I very much did. I just. I don't now. And...it's now that counts, right? I love you Mummy. I love you.
The wind and I, we speak the same, but he don’t hear so well.
Well, you’re gonna have to curse him, well you’re gonna have to yell.
The sky and I, we’ve had our fights and I’m coming round to rain,
Well, if the rain come round and it don’t come out, then I’ll never have to speak again,
I can tick tick tick tick tick tick tick away.
If Heaven is as Heaven does then this is Hell for sure...
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Quiet little Angel
- just plain inspiring

- Posts: 7754
- Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2005 2:10 pm
- Location: somewhere between blue tulips and anxiety...
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by Quiet little Angel » Mon Jan 22, 2007 11:31 pm
oh would you just stop that? how come you don't get it? i've told you to mind your own business... i've told you i don't want you to smother me in friendship... just STOP... stop it... i don't want your friendship, i don't want you to care, i want you to stop contacting me... i want you to mind you own business... you're the only person i don't want to care... i hate the way you behave towards me, and i wish i could just make you go away... don't call don't write... just leave me alone... NOW
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finding neverland
- meeting the neighbors

- Posts: 396
- Joined: Sun Dec 10, 2006 12:42 am
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by finding neverland » Mon Jan 22, 2007 11:53 pm
You're amazing, much more than I could ever wish for, you're hilarious, fucking gorgeous, so thoughtful and to be honest, I'd give anything to be with you. The other ones meant nothing, the ones at the parties, all the time I wanted to be with you. When I'm with the others I just think about how much I'd rather be you. And when you're with the other girls, I don't get jealous because I see the way you look at them and the way you look at me.
I love you to bits. I always will.
<p><center>
You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you. That's where I'll be waiting.
~
Scar tissue has no character. It's not like skin. It doesn't show age or illness or pallor or tan. It has no pores, no hair, no wrinkles. It's like a slipcover. It shields and disguises what's beneath.
[That's why we grow it, we have to something to hide.]
~
Every window on Alcatraz has a view of San Francisco.
</center><p>
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QuietPurr
- meeting the neighbors

- Posts: 317
- Joined: Tue Jul 06, 2004 11:43 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: Climbing out of the abyss
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by QuietPurr » Tue Jan 23, 2007 1:33 pm
T - Why can't you help me? I don't understand why you can't get off of your ass and do anything.
"To oppose something is to maintain it."
-Ursula K. Le Guin
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finding neverland
- meeting the neighbors

- Posts: 396
- Joined: Sun Dec 10, 2006 12:42 am
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by finding neverland » Wed Jan 24, 2007 12:12 am
I want you to stay away. Well away.
<p><center>
You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you. That's where I'll be waiting.
~
Scar tissue has no character. It's not like skin. It doesn't show age or illness or pallor or tan. It has no pores, no hair, no wrinkles. It's like a slipcover. It shields and disguises what's beneath.
[That's why we grow it, we have to something to hide.]
~
Every window on Alcatraz has a view of San Francisco.
</center><p>
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Seeshellz
- my other car is a bus

- Posts: 34295
- Joined: Tue May 18, 2004 1:51 am
- Location: Hiding in my shell...
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by Seeshellz » Wed Jan 24, 2007 1:51 am
I feel like such a failure, you say I'm a victim, I guess I am. With all my fear and flashbacks and such. But saying that doesn't help me...How does that help me??? I'm trying my best...You push and push and push, you just make things worse...I'm sitting at home terrified....Stupid PTSD...
"If you learn from your suffering,
and really come to understand the lesson you were taught,
you might be able to help someone else who's now
in the phase you may have just completed.
Maybe that's what it's all about after all..."
Anonymous
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