I'm angry. I'm hurt. I'm scared. And I'm frustrated.
I started selfinjuring again. I've never really been able to stop. But I know I need to, so I started to talk about it. I told my a few of my friends, and my room mate and my mother and sister and brother. I've told a few room mates before but they always kind of ignored my words. Anyway, now I'm all open about it and I feel sick and evil and I want to selfinjure even more! Too many emotions! Too much! I still can't tell my dad. He calls suicide the act of the most selfish of people. He'd be disgusted with me. He'd make me want to die. I'm so mad! I've only si-ed a little bit since I got home, just not to dissapoint my mother but my skin crawls all the time with the desire to do it. My father also comments on my body and my clothes and it's disturbing me. It used to not bother me but now the things he does, how insensitive he is and just how he thinks he has a right to comment on my sexuality or sexiness makes me sick, and makes me want to si violently. I'm trying to be calm, to push it down because if I explode no one will listen and I'm talking. I am talking. But right now I feel like things are as tumutuous inside as ever.
What do I do? How do I act? Am I evil that I don't feel like I 'want' to stop though I know I 'should'?
Now that I've talked...
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