how do u view yourself and why?

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

Moderators: Spidey, noldo

Post Reply
User avatar
collide
part of the fixtures
part of the fixtures
Posts: 2418
Joined: Mon Aug 08, 2005 7:57 am
Location: northern cal
Contact:

how do u view yourself and why?

Post by collide » Mon Nov 28, 2005 4:54 pm

ok i just wanted to write this out...because i know i have some false beliefs about myself but i can't see them all of them...

i view myself as an INTELLIGENT person, yet i also see myself as a complete FAILURE....(if i am not working, or in school-mainly)

i view myself as a KIND and COMPASSIONATE person, yet i also see myself as a HORRIBLE person (i have the heart to help, teach, care for kids, but i regress to the past because my parents abused me and it was ingrained in my head that they REALLY hated me because i am so HORRIBLE)

i view myself as ARTISTIC, yet i also don't think i'm that great (i paint, write poetry, write music....but haven't made myself keeo at it, so i haven't done anything to feel proud of myself really)

i view myself as GOOD LOOKING, yet i also see myself as FAT and UGLY....(i am my normal weight and i look young for my age, and i also have been told i am beautiful....but then i see myself as fat and ugly because i am not skinny enuff...i still have flab)

viewtopic.php?t=88288&start=120 (my PLACE)

:painting: COLLIDE

User avatar
disastercake
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 3342
Joined: Sun Oct 02, 2005 1:12 am
Gender: Female
Location: USA

Post by disastercake » Thu Dec 01, 2005 1:14 am

I feel very much the same.
:bfly: -Al :bfly:

"...And once you have tasted flight,
you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards,
for there you have been,
and there you long to return..."
- Leonardo da Vinci

My Place

User avatar
jup0se1
one of us
one of us
Posts: 23
Joined: Sun Dec 11, 2005 12:49 am
Location: North West, UK

Post by jup0se1 » Sun Dec 11, 2005 7:45 pm

stupid...

User avatar
HSUgirl
unpacking boxes
unpacking boxes
Posts: 31
Joined: Thu Feb 09, 2006 10:19 pm
Location: Abilene,Texas
Contact:

Post by HSUgirl » Mon Feb 20, 2006 10:35 pm

Well everyone views me as a very funny, honest, kind, etc person. I see myself as a complete failure, worthless, and UGLY.

User avatar
Copasetic
creating your space
creating your space
Posts: 227
Joined: Sat Oct 30, 2004 12:26 am
Location: Ontario

Post by Copasetic » Mon Feb 20, 2006 10:48 pm

I'm the same as you in some areas... I know I'm intelligent, but I'm also a total failure (in everything, but especially school)... and I view myself as being kind-hearted, loyal, compassionate, etc... but also as an overall terrible person.

I don't know how I have such conflicting sides, but I do.
So this is the new year - and I don't feel any different...

User avatar
HSUgirl
unpacking boxes
unpacking boxes
Posts: 31
Joined: Thu Feb 09, 2006 10:19 pm
Location: Abilene,Texas
Contact:

Post by HSUgirl » Tue Feb 21, 2006 2:38 am

I just don't know why I feel this away about myself. I've always felt this away about myself. And I don't seem to get any better. I wish I felt better about myself but I try and I always end up feeling like a failure.

User avatar
Callisto
postmaster
postmaster
Posts: 37888
Joined: Sun May 04, 2003 3:22 pm

Post by Callisto » Tue Feb 21, 2006 3:06 am

cheap, dirty, stupid, worthless, pathetic.

i dont know why...i've always felt this way.

User avatar
xx_please_save_me_xx
one of us
one of us
Posts: 20
Joined: Sat Mar 11, 2006 3:48 am
Location: Michigan
Contact:

Post by xx_please_save_me_xx » Sun Mar 12, 2006 12:54 am

worthless, useless, pathetic, stupid, a failure, lonely, cheap, unwanted, ugly, fat, miserable, like everything that goes wrong is my fault :cry:

I just have very low self esteem and it makes me feel worse than I should

LexieK88
unpacking boxes
unpacking boxes
Posts: 34
Joined: Thu Mar 09, 2006 3:16 am

Post by LexieK88 » Sun Mar 12, 2006 1:57 am

A complete hypocrite, a failure and a huge disappointment. The opposite of what I should be and what I always said I would be.

On the other hand, I am working very hard to change all that. That makes me feel much better. I guess I do have to give myself some credit there. But over all, right now I am not very happy with myself and am extremely disappointed in my recent choices.
~*~Lexie K.~*~

User avatar
black_23
quintessential regular
quintessential regular
Posts: 1913
Joined: Tue Jan 24, 2006 4:52 pm
Location: Off the map

Post by black_23 » Mon Mar 13, 2006 11:38 pm

Invisible, worthless, stupid, paranoid, selfish (without meaning to be), but i care so much.
'Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life' Picasso

'IS THERE NO WAY OUT OF THE MIND?' Sylvia Plath


My Poetry
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=97459

My Place
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=97307

User avatar
Unleash the Bats
building community
building community
Posts: 711
Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2005 7:35 pm
Location: The Tour Bus

Post by Unleash the Bats » Wed Mar 15, 2006 12:54 pm

i see myself as caring, intelligent, funny and ok looking - on a good day

i see myself as a selfish failure with no hopes and prospects on a bad day,

im tired of bad days tho
:blkstar: :redstar: Danix :redstar: :blkstar:
Image

User avatar
scarlit_sky
meeting the neighbors
meeting the neighbors
Posts: 262
Joined: Sun Apr 25, 2004 9:45 pm
Location: ...the other side of the mirror....
Contact:

Post by scarlit_sky » Wed Mar 15, 2006 11:50 pm

Everyone tells me that I am smart and good looking and caring. I don't know if I believe them though. On a good day, I believe them. On a bad day, I don't.

On a good day, I view myself as creative, pretty, intelligent, and a good listener. On a bad day, I view myself as ugly, stupid, slow, and weak. I know that these are unfair to myself and probably false beliefs but... to me they feel real at the time.

~Emily :bcatsmile:
<CENTER>
<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/">
<img border="0" src="http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/ ... t.png"></a>

<a href="http://www.geocities.com/flower_onthe_wall">Flower on the Wall</a> (my website - UNDER CONSTRUCTION)

<a href="http://scarlit-sky.livejournal.com/">Reflection of a Hidden Heart</a> (my CURRENT blog)

"Anyone can hit bottom--but can you bounce back up?"

</CENTER>

plantt
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 16078
Joined: Sat Jun 15, 2002 3:59 pm
Contact:

Post by plantt » Tue Mar 21, 2006 4:08 pm

at the start of this thread i thought maybe it'd become a place where people could learn to challenge false beliefs they have about themselves (whether or not those beliefs seem completely true)

quite a few of the replies are very negative.

i'm wondering if this could be changed & moved back into being a coping thread rather than a 'list negative things about self' thread... =)

what are you doing about those negative views... what are some positive things? etc....

User avatar
red umbrellas
beyond inspiring
beyond inspiring
Posts: 8175
Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 8:50 am
Location: Sydney

Post by red umbrellas » Thu Mar 23, 2006 12:50 pm

I was just about to post about how negative all this was....and then saw that plantt had beaten me to it :wink:

i think the way that unleash expressed it was good: on a good day I feel this. On a bad day, I feel something else. But if I know the reality of a good day, I can challenge those beliefs.

Low self esteem is a curse. But keep lists of nice things people say about you, and remember they can't all be lying.
It's all life and fire and lunacy
And excuses and excuses and excuses

Hold On To Yourself - Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds

"We paint a picture of a scenario - and then we become afraid of it" - Andrea Fella

User avatar
katja
growing roots
growing roots
Posts: 970
Joined: Sun Sep 08, 2002 7:00 pm
Gender: girl
Location: england

Post by katja » Fri Mar 24, 2006 12:59 pm

I think I kind of like myself.
I diddnt used to think that, but now I do looking at other peoples responses.
I think I'm fun and pretty I know people like being around me most of the time. I think Im incredibly unstable, but thats the only thing I would really criticize, and I know thats the thing that people love about me that I'm unstable, because their stupid and I make their life more exciting and unpredictable even though it can be incredibly tiresome sometimes. I wish I could find somebody who was exciting all by themselves and diddnt need to be with someone crazy to feel real.
I get low self esteemy about my art work, its so personal and its not like other subjects, if I dont get into university it will be a personal criticizm on me.

User avatar
Greta_Chan
creating your space
creating your space
Posts: 163
Joined: Fri Jul 30, 2004 6:16 pm
Location: U.S.
Contact:

Post by Greta_Chan » Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:41 am

I see myself as many things, which I'm not going to say since they might be triggering to myself and others, but I had this one therapist say to me once in response to me saying I feel like everything is my fault:

"So if everything is your fault, than you are responsible for everything, in which case you are super woman? Right? I mean think about it, you can't be everywhere at once nor can you cause everything wrong in the world; it's impossible. Stop trying to be God and start being yourself: A wonderful, lovely girl that deserves to have the responsibility of taking care of just herself."

What he said made me realize that I put to much responsibility into my own hands and that there is no way I could cause absolutely everything. Also, I know that I can't control the world, so why try? Just go with the flow and be responsible for yourself. I really needed to hear that, so I hope it helped. Also, I am one to be prone to parentification (the act of taking on the responsibilities of others due to your parents not taking there own responsibilities in you early childhood), so I try to tell myself that I'm not every single person's mother. If I was, I'm sure I would have one huge migraine. ::Snickers::

Anyway, that's my two cents.
"Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate."
- Excerpt from V's introduction speech to Evey when they first meet in the movie, V for Vendetta.

Peace and Love!
~Greta
***************************************
<a href="http://busmail.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php? ... 70"><b><My Place></b></a>

User avatar
Unleash the Bats
building community
building community
Posts: 711
Joined: Tue Jul 19, 2005 7:35 pm
Location: The Tour Bus

Post by Unleash the Bats » Wed Mar 29, 2006 2:55 pm

glitterflower wrote:I was just about to post about how negative all this was....and then saw that plantt had beaten me to it :wink:

i think the way that unleash expressed it was good: on a good day I feel this. On a bad day, I feel something else. But if I know the reality of a good day, I can challenge those beliefs.
thanks. i didnt mean it to come out as a bad message or what ever, but thats just the way i persieve myself. the way i am trying to overcome those bad days by trying to distract myself, to paint my nails, to wash my hair, make a sandwich, make a cup of tea, do things that make me feel nice.

sorry to bring the tone of the thread down
:blkstar: :redstar: Danix :redstar: :blkstar:
Image

User avatar
red umbrellas
beyond inspiring
beyond inspiring
Posts: 8175
Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 8:50 am
Location: Sydney

Post by red umbrellas » Wed Mar 29, 2006 3:41 pm

Unleash the Bats wrote:
glitterflower wrote:I was just about to post about how negative all this was....and then saw that plantt had beaten me to it :wink:

i think the way that unleash expressed it was good: on a good day I feel this. On a bad day, I feel something else. But if I know the reality of a good day, I can challenge those beliefs.
thanks. i didnt mean it to come out as a bad message or what ever, but thats just the way i persieve myself. the way i am trying to overcome those bad days by trying to distract myself, to paint my nails, to wash my hair, make a sandwich, make a cup of tea, do things that make me feel nice.

sorry to bring the tone of the thread down
No, what I meant was that you didn't at all :) You were realistic about things - your recognised that, ok, if i'm having a bad day my perceptions of myself will change, but on a good day you *can* still think nice things about yourself.
so not a criticism at all!

and it's good to see you've got some coping mechanisms lined up to make you feel better about yourself on a bad day :star:
It's all life and fire and lunacy
And excuses and excuses and excuses

Hold On To Yourself - Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds

"We paint a picture of a scenario - and then we become afraid of it" - Andrea Fella

User avatar
red umbrellas
beyond inspiring
beyond inspiring
Posts: 8175
Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 8:50 am
Location: Sydney

Post by red umbrellas » Wed Mar 29, 2006 3:46 pm

And to answer the question myself:

On a bad day, I get unmotivated. I feel stupid and unworthy. But I'm not stupid...I'm quite smart really, or I wouldn't be where I am today.

I think I'm reasonably pretty. Ok, I definitely have some ugly days, but so does everyone (don't they?!?!).

I've often felt unlovable. But I can't be. My friends at home have kept in touch with me over thousands of miles. My parents love me to death and I know it. I've made some wonderful friends here. I have an amazing boyfriend. So I must be a good person :)

I'm kind. I care a lot about my friends. And they come to me when they need help or advice.

I have a good sense of humour. It does die occasionally when I'm feeling bad....but everyone has bad days.

I'm pretty easy to get on with. I very rarely fight with people.

Hmmm....not perfect by any means. But I wouldn't change who I am...not these days anyway. :)
It's all life and fire and lunacy
And excuses and excuses and excuses

Hold On To Yourself - Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds

"We paint a picture of a scenario - and then we become afraid of it" - Andrea Fella

~starblaze~
knows the ropes
knows the ropes
Posts: 4554
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2005 5:12 pm

Post by ~starblaze~ » Wed Mar 29, 2006 3:54 pm

I like several other people on here, see myself differently on a bad day and a good day.

I want to try and only write out though how i see myself on a good day so that maybe if im having a bad day i can come to this and remind myself 'this is how i see myself when im not feeling down/upset or whatever'

I see myself as kind and caring towards my family and my friends and those i love because i try to be nice to everyone and i do care about what happens to those around me and how they are feeling. :blush:
I see myself as a very loyal and trustworthy friend who will be there if they say they will and i know that people do feel as if they can talk to me if they need to. :blush:
I see myself as loveable. I know my family love me and i know K does too. :blush:
I see myself as shy but once someone gets to know me i can be quite talkative and lively and pretty hyper at times too! :tongue:
I see myself as strong, ive been through quite a lot in my life, not as much as some, but more than i guess others must have done and ive got through it all and i know ill never give up. :blush:

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 85 guests