How do you feel about your scars?

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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wish
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Post by wish » Sun Jan 29, 2006 12:33 pm

im not really too bothered about hiding them unless its from a medical professianl or my mum-if she sees i give her some excuse.im not really sure how i feel about them,i spose they dont really bother me.if some one asks i tell them i fell or caught on something-its not their buisness and im not going to waste my energy explaining or making up elaborate excuses.let em judge me

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Post by PurplePixie » Sun Jan 29, 2006 8:46 pm

I dislike my scars but i also know whatever i do and however much they fade, they will always be there and are a part of me. I think you just need to learn to live with them, nobody has a right to question them, you can say you would rather not talk about them. afterall if someone has an obvious wound caused by an accident people might stare but they would never ask what where how and why.
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Post by beautiful_facade » Mon Jan 30, 2006 1:22 am

i also see my scars as words and my body as the paper...they tell my story and it's a unique one.

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Post by Guest » Sun Feb 05, 2006 1:57 am

i am not ashamed of my scars actualy.


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_MessedUp_
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Post by _MessedUp_ » Mon Feb 06, 2006 5:32 pm

I'm ashamed of my new scars, but not of my old. My old scars are a marker of what i went through, but also of what i've overcome. They remind me how close i've come to giving up, and how hard i tried to hold on. My new scars are not this, my new scars are signs that i've taken a step back, and that i'm in danger of being who i used to be, so in that sense i am ashamed of them.

Nonetheless they are all a part of me, and i can't change who i was only who i will be
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Post by Guest » Mon Feb 06, 2006 9:17 pm

Actualy my old ones yah im not ashamed of those ones. i dont have many new ones except the one on my leg. yah i guess im kinda ashamed of that one. it was a si for no reason too.


Chey

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How do I feel about my scars

Post by sisterbig » Thu Feb 09, 2006 2:39 pm

Even though I caused them, I see them as battle scars. My perps were too good to leave scars. They knew where to hurt me and it wouldn't show. My scars are my testament to what they did to me. I don't care who sees them or know that.

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Post by Becky » Thu Feb 09, 2006 11:23 pm

I hate my scars so much, they are really bad, I have to wear a jumper in summer to hide them, I am so ashamed of them but I can't stop myself adding to them.
I'm screwed this year though am going to Florida in july its the hottest time to go, there is no way I can wear long sleeves there, I'll pass out with the heat. :(
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Post by DecemberLivy » Fri Feb 10, 2006 4:44 pm

i dont like to look at them, they just make me want to go back to that place in my mind (everyones been there sometime)
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Post by theboldeditalics » Fri Feb 10, 2006 7:49 pm

I kind of like looking at them, it does remind me of bad times ect. but it also reminds me that I've passed those times, maybe not sucessfully, but nontheless I have.
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Post by aimee929 » Sat Feb 11, 2006 5:00 am

I have mixed feelings about my scars. The only ones I have are on my thighs. I don't like for people to see them-- esp since most people don't know about my SI. On the other hand, I don't care if my friends who know about my SI see them.

I wonder what spring and summer will be like this year b/c I have quite a few more scars this year than last year & it's pretty obvious that they're intentional injuries...

I also feel sort of proud of my scars b/c I feel like it is the only physical reminders I have-- or proof I have-- of the hell I have gone through in struggling with anxiety, depression, etc. Does anyone else feel that way?

As I said to my doctor recently-- my scars make me look the way I feel.

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Post by copygirl » Sat Feb 11, 2006 6:53 am

I definitely don't like my scars, but usually I'm ambivalent ... I wouldn't mind having them, except I don't want people I work with to see them and ask weird questions.

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Post by Guest » Sun Feb 12, 2006 1:54 pm

Try a loose white or bright colour rayon shirt with long sleeves. That fabric tends to feel cool and if there is a breeze it feels sooo nice. I was in florida in the summer to (last july).

Edited to add more ...
You can try say an east Indian clothing shop. They might actualy be able to help you out with that. I bought my top there. I felt comfterble enough not to wear it though, but i had it incase. I did use my indian skirts cause my scars are all on my legs.



Chey

Becky wrote:I hate my scars so much, they are really bad, I have to wear a jumper in summer to hide them, I am so ashamed of them but I can't stop myself adding to them.
I'm screwed this year though am going to Florida in july its the hottest time to go, there is no way I can wear long sleeves there, I'll pass out with the heat. :(

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Post by marshmallowfluff » Sun Feb 12, 2006 2:41 pm

i dont.... care to be honest. I try to hide them, and would be completely mortified if someone saw them, but i would feel okay if i was going swimming or wearing something short for a formal event (was contemplating getting a short dress for my prom) but i wouldn't wear a skirt or a normal day, if that makes sense. The only reason i wont go swimming is because of the scarred words.
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Post by forevercryingtears03 » Sun Feb 12, 2006 9:59 pm

Im not usually ashamed of my scars, because they remind me of my past, and how far Ive come from those times. When people see them, they dont usually say anything, but I can tell that they see them from the looks on their faces. But when they do say something, its more on the lines of "What happened?" or "Stupid cutter..".

Yes, I do have scars on easy-to-hide places, and yes I always cover them up.. because those are the more bad ones.
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Post by Dylana » Sun Feb 12, 2006 10:47 pm

aimee929 wrote:I also feel sort of proud of my scars b/c I feel like it is the only physical reminders I have-- or proof I have-- of the hell I have gone through in struggling with anxiety, depression, etc. Does anyone else feel that way?
I do sometimes. It's a testament to all that I've overcome. I'm trying to change the way I feel about them. To learn to honor them for helping me through the tough times.

I'm so glad my post has gotten so many responses. It's really good to hear everyone's thoughts on this, and it's helped me in some way think about my scars differently.

My t and I were talking the other day and she suggested that I think about them as my inner zebra trying to get out. It's silly I know, but it adds a little bit of humor to what is usually a really serious train of thought
Becca

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Post by beautiful_facade » Mon Feb 13, 2006 5:18 pm

Yay! We all have inner zebras!

i like that thought! :boingrin:

You're right, it does add some humour to a delicate topic of conversation...i like it :)

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If I bore you, that is that. If I am clumsy, that may indicate partly the difficulty of my subject, and the seriousness with which I am trying to take what hold I can of it; more certainly, it will indicate my youth, my lack of mastery of my so-called art or craft, my lack perhaps of talent…
A piece of the body torn out by the roots might be more to the point.
James Agee.

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Post by angel2262 » Tue Feb 14, 2006 2:48 am

It all depends on my mood. When I'm mad I don't care people see I just tell them I got hurt at work or by an animal or something but my friends Know the truth and that bothers me...I lie to my family somethimes they believe me sometimes they don't.

When I'm happy I try to be very careful at what I wear so that My scars which I'm ashamed of won't show.

It all depends on my mood.
"Scars are stories, history written on the body"

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Post by scarlit_sky » Sat Feb 18, 2006 11:00 pm

Are you ashamed of your scars :uhhh:
Kind of. I look at my scars as reminders. I still cut, but there was a time, not long ago, that I had quit for four months. During that time, I would look at my scars and remember what I used to do, and remind myself why I quit. But yes, I am kind of ashamed of them.

What do you say to people when they notice :uhhh:
When people notice, I normally clam up, and don't really say anything. If I have to respond, I would say "It's in my past." even though it's not. Nowadays though, I've been hiding them most of the time because I have cuts that needs to be covered. The only problem was when a doctor noticed the scars. He knew what they were from, but he still asked "What are these from?" I didn't know what to say, so I didn't say anything. Then he asked if I had been hurting myself and I just sat dumbstruck that he knew.

If you have scars on places that are easy to hide, do you always hide them :uhhh:
My scars are easy to hide right now because it's winter, but in the summer I normally just wear short sleeves and risk it. People don't normally notice, but when they do, I can normally get out of it pretty easily, without questions.

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Post by -Kim- » Tue Feb 21, 2006 3:50 am

I am ashamed of my scares too I have a pool in my backyrd and my parenst are always asking me why I dont go swimming. I donno what to say. I dont even look at my legs anymore they discust me so much. Mine are pretty much places here no one will see em.
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