anyone do this?...hiding crying?

Surly · Post by **Surly** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 9:39 pm

Ive never had an abusinve family.. But I hate crying in front of people... Lately its happening so much, when im at school and i cant do any thing else, but i dont let people see... i tend to run away, or just turn away... I dont know.. I feel that its weak, even though i know its not... I always apologise if anyone sees me crying.. I dont know why... I think its a self-trained thing, to give all the d*cks at my old school one less thing to laugh at me about.. Theyd leave me alone a bit if i didnt cry...

SpecialBlend · Post by **SpecialBlend** » Sat Oct 22, 2005 11:50 pm

The only person I have ever let see me cry other then my mom has been my ex. Now adays I usually just bite my tongue and hold it in. Then when I am alone i break down

~*Star*~ · Post by **~*Star*~** » Sun Oct 23, 2005 12:25 am

crying has always been an issue with me. i'm ok with people seeing me cry if its about petty things- i get emotional over nothing when i'm on my period. but if its actually about something, i can't do it around people. normally, if i'm with my T and i feel tears coming i will bite my lip, look away from her and glare at something for ages until they go away. she tried to bring that up with me, but i'm still working on it. the only person who has seen me cry properly is my dan, and even then i have to hide in his chest so he cant see my face... i cry silently.

maybe it is a trust issue?

kaylinb86 · Post by **kaylinb86** » Sun Oct 23, 2005 6:12 pm

i can't cry in front of other people either. i do the sunglasses trick a lot, actually.

Surly · Post by **Surly** » Thu Nov 10, 2005 2:59 pm

Oh, hell, I used to have these sunglasses that I would never take off at one point, to to hide the fact that I had been. I hate people seeing me even after, so *shrug*

Then I sat on them and broke them, and Ive never had the heart to get some new ones.

Im slightly more restrained now anyway... Most of the time.

Scatterbrain · Post by **Scatterbrain** » Fri Nov 11, 2005 7:04 am

I didnt grow up with abuse or anything, but I have the same problem with crying in front of people. The few times I have cried, I felt like I let myself down, and wasnt the strong person I should have been... I just have problems showing emotion in general... Not happy emotions, its usually just the bad ones I cannot let people see. Also, I cant talk about my religion with anyone... I get almost embarrased to be Catholic, but I shouldnt... I dunno what the deal is...

~Megan

Titania · Post by **Titania** » Fri Nov 11, 2005 9:45 pm

I never can let my self cry in front of others. It feels like showing others that I'm having problems makes the problems more real. Some times it gets to be to much and I break down and cry for half an hour or more. But only in front of my parents. Never in front of my friends, not even my brother. I feel that I can't let them know I having problems, when they think I'm fine.

~* Titania *~

copygirl · Post by **copygirl** » Sun Nov 13, 2005 6:12 am

I don't want to cry in front of others b/c I'm either not crying at all or sobbing. I can't just cry a little bit, if that makes sense. It's very annoying.

dbms · Post by **dbms** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 2:51 am

When I was young (early teens) I made a decision that the world and people in would not make me cry. Up untill then I was always in tears over something so don't cry normally. Mayby a little moist in the eye for a sad movie, birth of my children. But I hide that. I really don't want people pestering me about what the problem is.

I often wonder what it would be like to have that release/ outlet again. It seems that I shut down more than I bargined for when I vowed never to cry again.

Take care...

lostchild · Post by **lostchild** » Thu Nov 17, 2005 11:47 pm

that is actually where si came from for me.... i would not cry in front of anyone so i cut myself as an alternative outlet... so even now if anyone makes me feel bad i clench a fist a nd dig my nails into my palm or something, to not cry...

disastercake · Post by **disastercake** » Sat Nov 19, 2005 1:27 am

My parents aren't abusive or anything, but I was never allowed to be excited, be angry, or anything else. When I cried when I was young, which wasn't very often, my dad would be a real ass about it and harass me and make fun of me. Now, I've felt like I can't cry, like I've shut down. The one adult (the one person actually) that I talk to about my SI broke down and cried on my shoulder recently. That has made me trust her a little more, and I feel more comfortable about showing emotion, although I still haven't. Now, I know that I'll end up crying in front of her eventually, and I don't have as much of a problem with it.

Brokenwings11 · Post by **Brokenwings11** » Sun Nov 20, 2005 2:59 am

I'm not sure if my family could be considered abusive (my brother used to hurt me a few years ago), but they were most defintely neglectful. When I was in elementary school from grades 3-6 (K-2 were spent happily overseas) I was the one of three Asians in the school. I was short, I didn't know anything about America, and this made me pretty shy. Everyone teased me because I was a bookworm and for a long time, without my parents realizing it, I didn't speak at all. This behavior towards me continued for a long time, and still does.

After awhile, I just sort of 'knew' that if I cried, it would just make things worse. I'm sad to say that none of my friends have ever seen me cry. None. People I've known for 5 or more years and shocked if the words 'crying' and my name are ever repeated in the same sentence. It's just a fact. The reason my parents have seen me cry is because my brother used to hit me and pet s. That's it. In fact, the only other times I can remember crying is at sad movies or me seeing something angsty and losing it...alone.

So now, even though I know that crying is okay, I still unconciously see it as 'weak'. Don't let that stop you from letting people know how you really feel.

anyone do this?...hiding crying?

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