Things Left Unsaid *LA*

[Guest]

Everyone - I don't mean to be the way I am

[demidivine]

i understand why you dumped me. even if it was a little your fault, it was essentially mine. and now that i can blame it on myself, i know what to do. and i won't chase you.

[LBC]

With all due respect, it was more than an inconvenience, and it hurts that you won't acknowledge that. It makes me think that you don't value my time or the effort that I put into this, and confirms my suspiscion that you really don't listen to me at all.

Thank you for the apology, though.

[whatashame]

Mom - It's okay. I'm working on it, and NO I don't want to call your friend who is a counselor.

Tom - I don't know if I really love you anymore, and I'm pretty sure you don't love me. Let's stop pretending and get on with the divorce already. If you do love me, please tell me because I'm dying inside everyday.

Sher - I know you love me, leave me alone, but don't leave me.

Myles - I love you more than anything in this world my son, I'm sorry I'm so sick. I'm going to get better and I love you no matter what. You are the most special person in my world.

Victoria - please stop cutting yourself, your too young to go through this and I don't want you to hurt the way I do.

Tracy - Just believe in me, I can do it.

Jack - Thank you for loving me enough to just let me be me. I love you unconditionally. Thank you.

Kenneth - I've had you for a father figure for so long, but you never except me, why? And I hate the way you treat otjher people.

Every man that has ever hurt me - Why? I can't believe that you did that to me. You didn't deserve me, you didn't even ask. I hate you, but I'm sorry for you too.

God, that felt good.
whatashame

[balletomane]

M-the sex/porn stuff makes me really uncomfortable. please leave it out of our room.

C, J, J: the three of you are awesome. Please don't do this to yourselves. I am not judging your drug use--I am just worried about you.

[Cellardoor]

to everyone...
please dont hurt me.
im so serious here, i just cant handle anything else in anyway negative, just please all be nice to me. PLEASE dont hurt me. theres no more room.

[kurdt_kobain]

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[what_if]

D: I hate you. But i want you to care about me atleast for a minute.

[ianthe]

therapist- I am paying you $80 a week, so maybe you could just pretend to not hate me. you don't seem to hate the others in the group, so why me? It is just confirming for me my bad beliefs about myself. If you don't like something I'm doing, I wish you'd just fucking tell me.

mom- you're such a bitch and I hate you so much. I hate living with you and your stupid religion.

mr.B- yeah it's been 4 years since I graduated, but I still hate you. you're the most self-righteous, hypocritical bastard I've ever met, and if there were a hell you'd be the best candidate to go there.

david- you're brilliant, and beautiful, and I want to hold you and kiss you.

[shadowavenger]

mum: i love you, but I can't deal with your problems as well as my own. Please admit you have problems and get help, no-one will think any less of you.

dad: fuck you. Stop drinking or get the fuck out of my life, my mother's and my sister's and give your youngest child a chance to grow up vaguely normally, without you destroying our mother and destroying us in the process. Even if you do stop drinking, you can never repay what you've taken and I don't know how you even sleep at night. I want you to feel guilty, to feel some of the pain you've pushed onto me. If you can't do that, at least have the decency to get out.

bev: i love you, but i know you only see me as a friend and I'm cool with that. Thankyou for being there for me so many times, and don't be afraid to ask for help and hugs if you need them cuz I'm here for you too. That's what friends are for.

roo: do anything you can, so you don't end up just like them. If you ever need me, please let me know and I'll try to help you. I don't want you to end up like me, I want you to be happy and to get everything you want because you're gonna be great - don't let all the mess from the past mess you up.

nic: i'm sorry I've been distant lately, I've been dealing with a lot of shit. Don't think its your fault and don't think we're not still mates, cuz you're a great guy. *hug*

claire: *hugs* good luck

x: please call me, or MSN me, or just get in contact. i miss you.

lu: how come it's my fault for what you did with your life? it's good that you've moved on but don't blame me cuz I tried so hard to help you. I'm sorry about what happened, but it was your fault too. I hope you really are okay now and not just bottling it all up cuz eventually it will break out, and you know it.

kat: GIVE UP A SUBJECT. It's going to drive you crazy and everyone is worried about you. Nobody needs 6 A levels, you need to spend that time in therapy. You have issues you need to work through and maybe you can start being a functional human being instead of an emotional fuck-up. You're not a rock, you're not an island, please accept the help you are offered.

[VowsOfSadness]

Chris:

Look me in the eyes again....I think this is it.

You see what youre seeing? Do you feel what youre feeling? Can we share this for a little longer?

And I never want to give your jacket back, it's warmth is just what I need to get you through.

[près de vous]

Simon: I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!!

[Cellardoor]

grandad robin: i love you, even after what you did even though im not even aloud to say your name even though your so fucked up and awful and even though everyone else hates you. i wish i didnt but i do.

mum: i think its your fault and that makes me cry. i dont want it to be your fault.

jess: i lied. i lied about so much. please dont hate me. i need you.

katie: im sorry your pissing me off so much, your my best friend and i need you and im so sorry.

dad: why were you in jail? tell me about yourself, i want to know you.

maurice: your not the only person with problems mate, open your eyes and get off your arse and try to enjoy living in our house, why do you walk out of the room everytime i go in? please be nice to my mum, she loves you and she needs you so just TRY ok? just fucking TRY you asshole. shes so vunerable and you hurt her so much PLEASE be nice to her. i wish i could trade you in for a puppy, i honest to god do. i know youve been through a lot but so have i, so has mum, so dont even start to think i dont no how you feel. just get a grip will you? your pathetic.

[(*Haven*)]

D ~ Listen. I'm not safe. I'm in a horrible place. I can't call you like you want. I can't do it. Damn it I wish I could. I know what I need. I need to go to the hospital. I need to be there to be safe. Because I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to keep msyelf safe. Everything is falling down around. It's all falling down and I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm fighting to survive. And I'm getting weaker and weaker. I seriously don't know how much longer I can do this. Dying just seems to be right....I mean really, it's right....I need you to help me. I need you to put me in the hospital. I need you to know things aren't right.

[ianthe]

people at school- I get the idea that you don't like me, but why? Is it because I'm fat? Or that I'm quiet? What is it? You are making me question myself more than I want to. Or is it all my imagination? Whatever. --Screw you guys, I'm going home--

david- from what I've seen, you're quite an amazing person. It is hard for me to concentrate in class, because you're so beautiful. and now I am miserable, sitting here thinking about you....

[swanfaerie]

I HATE YOU FOR BEING EMOTIONALLY DISTANT. I HATE YOU FOR BLAMING ME FOR ALL YOUR LONELINESS. I HATE THAT YOU KEPT YOUR HUSBAND BY KNOWINGLY LETTING HIM SA ME. I HATE THAT YOU KNEW AND YOU DID NOTHING. I HATE THAT YOU NOW TREAT ME LIKE SH** CUZ I WAS HIS LOVER AND I HATED IT AND IT RUINED ME. I HATE THAT YOU CANNOT SEE YOUR PART IN THIS. DID YOU ENJOY WATCHING HIM AND ME? DID YOU?
and i hate me for getting upset that you are the way you are because you'll never change and i should quit hoping that you might

[bexy]

Don't you get it? We're proud of you. Not ashamed. I've watched you fight this all my life and I know you're in pain, we all do. We're all proud of you and we all love you. My whole life I've heard you talk about this as if you will have failed when you get to this point. But you haven't. We love you. We're proud of you. Try to remember that

[Not_what]

will - why cant u see tht im reaching out to u, stop making excuses for me

[Blake 1]

A - i will never open up to you as long as you keep criticizing everything I do. i'm sorry i can't be all happy go lucky all the time. P & J are your best friends but i don't have a best friend or even a really close friend. it hurts so bad whenever P or J calls and they always ask for you and you sit there and talk to them for hours laughing at everything they say really loudly rubbing it in my face that no one likes me.

P - please stop making such a big deal when you see one of my cuts, especially in public. if you asked me in private i would open up to you and tell you the truth.

J - i try to open up to you but you seemed to get mad at me. you now say that you are not mad but why do you now avoid and ignore me? that doesn't make me feel good. i already feel bad enough.

A, P, & J - i don't go a lot of places with you guys anymore because i don't feel like part of your clique. actually i have felt left out for years, ever since i met you guys, but its just a whole lot worse now that you all have pushed A away. a lot of ppl see you guys pushing everyone else away cause no one's good enough for you guys but it really hurts me cause you guys are all i have. you know i don't have any other friends and you know i sit alone all those times when you guys go off together. you don't see me crying everyday cause i just wish i had some good friends who would listen to me and support me instead of treating me like i have some contagious disease. i also don't like all the childish things you guys do. that's why i don't laugh or participate at a lot of things you guys do or talk about. if you only knew how much you guys hurt me everyday. i feel so alone and being with you guys makes it worse sometimes. cause you guys always talk about things that you guys have done together and don't even notice me just sitting there in silence watching you guys laugh and wish i could laugh and have a good time too. you guys always talk about things and when i'm like "did i miss something?" you guys always say no but obviously i'm just not good enough to be included. P & J you never call for me, you always call for A. the only time you call for me P is to tell me to do something which i do no matter how much work and other stuff i have to do because i know that you don't want to do it and neither does A or J so you just dump everything on me. i do it only because i have a servant's heart and its pointless to fight about who's going to do it. i really need people like you guys in my life to support me but i understand that you are all too busy to bother with little ol' me. more than anything i want a good friend. more than anything. more than anything...

[Alethea]

M - I'm sorry for failing you. Sometimes I know I need help but I can't ever get it. I'm sorry.