insight please

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

Moderators: Spidey, noldo

Post Reply
holli
one of us
one of us
Posts: 22
Joined: Thu Sep 08, 2005 8:05 pm
Location: ohio

insight please

Post by holli » Sun Sep 25, 2005 2:48 pm

I have this person in my life who has been a huge help to me. She has been like a mom in many ways. I have made some progress in working through some of my issues, but it's a slow process. Well, this person who has been helping me is only doing so because of a promise she made, and not because she wants to anymore. I care about her and I know the best thing I can do for her is to leave her alone and get out of her life. But--I have grown to rely on her and her help. I need to leave her. How can I do that?
holly

User avatar
balletomane
one of us
one of us
Posts: 13705
Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 3:54 am

Post by balletomane » Sun Sep 25, 2005 3:51 pm

What other sources of support are available to you? I don't think it would be too unreasonable to ask her to help you find other places to look for help. Also, is it possible for you to maintain contact with her, but not as your primary source of support?

I hope things work out for you. :star:

holli
one of us
one of us
Posts: 22
Joined: Thu Sep 08, 2005 8:05 pm
Location: ohio

Post by holli » Sun Sep 25, 2005 7:30 pm

I do have another friend who knows about my SI and has been supportive. I also started to see another therapist who I think will suit me much better than my last. I do not trust easily (OK, at all) so I have to say my support network is quite small. I can't help but feel a certain level of rejection here, though. The feelings of rejection and abandonment are core issues of why I SI.

holly

User avatar
balletomane
one of us
one of us
Posts: 13705
Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 3:54 am

Post by balletomane » Sun Sep 25, 2005 8:11 pm

Hi Holly. Like you I am slow to trust people as well. Have you told your new therapist that you take time to trust people? I know it is a hard thing to just say, but I've found that when my doctors know that, they are more patient and understanding. :star:

holli
one of us
one of us
Posts: 22
Joined: Thu Sep 08, 2005 8:05 pm
Location: ohio

Post by holli » Sun Sep 25, 2005 8:49 pm

This therapist is very good. She specializes in severe childhood trama and abuse, so she knew and expected my trust level. At our first meeting she asked me to tell her what I need from her to help make me feel a little safer. That was good.

The person I feel wants me to go away it the first person I ever trusted. She is the first and only person I truly feel safe with. That's what makes this so hard.

holly

User avatar
balletomane
one of us
one of us
Posts: 13705
Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 3:54 am

Post by balletomane » Mon Sep 26, 2005 5:04 am

:(

That must be very tough. When you say that you feel she wants you to go away, what exactly do you mean? (if you don't mind sharing)

User avatar
balletomane
one of us
one of us
Posts: 13705
Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 3:54 am

Post by balletomane » Mon Sep 26, 2005 5:04 am

:(

That must be very tough. When you say that you feel she wants you to go away, what exactly do you mean? (if you don't mind sharing)

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 14 guests