Cope with cutting?

[black hurt]

How do you cope w/ cutting?
i dont know how to stop, but i want to now.

[katja]

its very hard to stop by yourself, you'll need extra help. I dunno if youve already told somebody but you should and ask them for their support. (be careful who you tell though, gossip starts this way) no matter what people think parents are a good idea, weather their good parents or not they usually want to help their kid coz they'll love you even if they dont understand.

maybe you should think about going to the doctors too and getting some therapy. they have all sorts of tips, you could work out why you cut with them and they can make you see how unhealthy it is to cope with things by self harm.

I find that a creative expression can help instead of hurting yourself. When im angry sometimes i get very violent and throw things or whatever, ive smashed up a few things in my time but usually my parents are understanding and say they can replace whatever it was I broke but not my skin if i cut! I think you'll find that if you try your hardest to stop in really emotional times your feelings will come out in other ways weather you like it or not, and most things feel more natural than cutting.

When your addicted to cutting you think about it a lot, its a good idea to call someone and maybe go see a movie or something if you start craving like this. Remove yourself from private places with sharp things.

I'm not an expert or anything, this is just what worked out for me. Hope it was kind of useful good luck

[aimee929]

Coping is something I have really been working on the past few years (since I started seeing the therapist I am with now).

One thing that I do is keep a list of coping strategies by my desk or coffee table or somewhere I am likely to be when the urge to SI comes on... ON my list are things that will help me deal with my anger (usually directed at myself). Sometimes, I also need to do something physical. I know lots of therapists recommend hitting a pillow, but that does nothing for me because a pillow is like hitting air. THe force is meaningless. So here are some of the things I try to do--

--Email a close friend (who knows that I SI) and let them know that they don't need to write back... I just need to vent

--Write in my journal. My journal has saved my life.

--Get in my car and play loud or angry music and sing or scream at the top of my lungs

--Color. I bought a huge pad of white paper & use crayons made for 3 year olds (literally-- the really big, thick ones) because they are hard to break.

--I love movies, so if I can, I'll watch a movie.

--Read a mindless book. I love mysteries for this, something to suck me into another world.

--Rip apart an old t-shirt

--Tear paper. Tearing several sheets of paper (like scrap paper) at one time requires more force.

--Break cheap plates, but be careful doing this. I wouldnt' do this unless someone else is there with you.

--Clean. I hate to clean, but it requires energy.

--Spend time with my dogs.

--Look at old photo albums.

***BIG ONE*** Call a friend. I have 4 close friends who know that I SI, and 3 of them have told me that I can call them when I feel like I am going to do it. What I usually say is, "I need to be distracted," and they know what I'm talking about. They let me talk through my feelings, tell me stories, share memories (all of these friends live far from me), make me laugh. By the end of the phone call, I am usually feeling better and over the urge to SI.

If my friends can handle it, I will ask them (or they will volunteer) to check on me periodically during the day. It helps keep me in check.


Hope some of these help...

love,
Aimee

[Tamrick]

Do you remember a time when you never SIed? I guess that is how I cope now. I try all sorts of things - there is a good list of coping strategies in the stickies on this board.

Firstly, allow yourself to fail - you don't have to be perfect.
Second, don't give up til you have tried every method (not every time, but at least once)
Third, allow yourself to be angry in a number of ways - shout, swear, puch something, do something artsitic in a n angry way and so on.

It takes a lot of practice and a lot of attempts.
Take it one day at a time (or even one hour at a time) and never never give up.

Good luck.
Tamrick

[chloe312]

find it very hard to stop, the longest i was si free for is 3 months. mainly because it was after the intial shock of when everyone found out, and they wer doin everything they could for me. i would advise telling sum1, but someone that u rly trust. a few of my best close frends no n they r incredible. i wouldnt b able to resist the temptation so much without them. it honestly helps to have someone u can ring at ne time n jst cry to. perhaps art could help u too? i find i can put my feelings into my art instead of venting them at myself, also gives u sumthin to focus on to take ur mind of it.
also if u do it on a sensitive area like a wrist, then keep teaspoons in the freezer, then wen u feel tempted, jst hold th cold teaspoon onto ur skin, the pain followed by numbness is a safe version of cutting.
if u si cos ur angry at urself take it out on other things (not other people, it tends to make me feel worse after!), watching the power cummin out of u and harming sumthin else instead of u can still giv u the control.
everyone has to find a differnt way, so these may not work for u, but dnt b put off, u need to find sum thing that is right for u, n how u feel, but u will need to understand y u do it in the first place
wotevr u chose i hope it works well for u, n dnt worry if u dnt suceed at first, if u "fail" by doin it once a month, thats still much better than doin it everyday, every step is progress.
*** big hug ***

[chloe312]

find it very hard to stop, the longest i was si free for is 3 months. mainly because it was after the intial shock of when everyone found out, and they wer doin everything they could for me. i would advise telling sum1, but someone that u rly trust. a few of my best close frends no n they r incredible. i wouldnt b able to resist the temptation so much without them. it honestly helps to have someone u can ring at ne time n jst cry to. perhaps art could help u too? i find i can put my feelings into my art instead of venting them at myself, also gives u sumthin to focus on to take ur mind of it.
also if u do it on a sensitive area like a wrist, then keep teaspoons in the freezer, then wen u feel tempted, jst hold th cold teaspoon onto ur skin, the pain followed by numbness is a safe version of cutting.
if u si cos ur angry at urself take it out on other things (not other people, it tends to make me feel worse after!), watching the power cummin out of u and harming sumthin else instead of u can still giv u the control.
everyone has to find a differnt way, so these may not work for u, but dnt b put off, u need to find sum thing that is right for u, n how u feel, but u will need to understand y u do it in the first place
wotevr u chose i hope it works well for u, n dnt worry if u dnt suceed at first, if u "fail" by doin it once a month, thats still much better than doin it everyday, every step is progress.
*** big hug ***