However, my closest friend has been doing all he damned can to keep me here. Sometimes I hate him for it; it would be a lot easier to be able to die and know that I wasn't leaving someone behind that can't cope without me. But I also love him, and I know that he wants me to keep going for him, and that if I keep holding on to him and not letting go, then chances are things might get better. I'm living on that hope. So that's all good, when it gets bad I talk to him, he keeps me holding on.
But last night he said something which was basically "I know I'm being horrendously selfish, and that I might never understand how bad you feel it is to be you, but I don't understand HOW you can think about leaving me like this. The mere thought of you possibly wanting to commit sucide hurts me more than I can express".
I don't know what to do about that
![:( :(](./images/smilies/icon_frown.gif)
So my question is, without completely backing away and isolating myself (which, lets face it, is my first thought), how do you cope with your suicidal feelings/thoughts/urges hurting the people around you?