Excuses

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Dolores
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Excuses

Post by Dolores » Wed Jul 27, 2005 10:04 pm

my parents and people have noticed my scars, which i thought were pretty insignificant, but i was wondering what sort of excuses people use? ive got a few but none are totally convincing. in general i try to hide them, but its really scary if someone comments on something i thought had gone away -does anyone have any strategies?

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BrokenGurl
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Post by BrokenGurl » Wed Jul 27, 2005 10:06 pm

well you can say that you hurt your self at work(if you have a job).....dog/cat scartched you....or you can say i dunno...wow..how did i do that...hmmm... :wink:
speak as though noone's listening....

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Skyeler
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Post by Skyeler » Thu Jul 28, 2005 12:57 am

I use the following:

-"oh that, old soccer injury"
-"surfing"
-"skateboarding"
-"cat"
-'well see, it's a funny story actually.... like two years ago my mom's neighbour had to go away on a trip because her daughter was getting married and she didn't want to get married at home because then her entire family would have to come and so... blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...."
Most people get bored after awhile, or the subject gets changed.


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Post by balletomane » Thu Jul 28, 2005 2:48 am

Sometimes people supply the excuse for me ("Do you have a cat?")

Sometimes I tell them it's a long and uninteresting story or just ignore the question. That all depends on how well I know the person though.

Thorn bushes could also work. I also have claimed that scars on my leg were from shaving.

jamie28

Post by jamie28 » Thu Jul 28, 2005 4:02 am

i just give them a really cold glare. they shut right up.

jamie

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mallie
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Post by mallie » Thu Jul 28, 2005 7:55 am

I typically tell the truth, and say that I did it, and then go on to explain why if asked.

If I'm not up to talking about it, I'll say "I don't want to talk about it" or say that it was a long time ago.

Why do you need excuses? especially for people like parents and friends, opening up (although scary) can be a wonderful thing.

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Forget Me
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Post by Forget Me » Thu Jul 28, 2005 10:15 am

yeah, it can be hard. i dunno.
there is a thread on sourcebook which is quite good, most of the excuses on it are just hilarious, but some are just crazy enough to work. and some are actually quite good :)
have a look, its good for a laugh, if nothing else.
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Post by anngie » Thu Jul 28, 2005 5:38 pm

whatever you do, don't freak out. try to act like it is no big deal and come up with some kind of lame excuse and then just change the subject. as long as you act natural then no one will think anything further of it. this can be hard, but after a couple times it feels normal. however it may be a good idea to discuss it openly with close friends and family. if they know you well enough they won't buy the excuses and as long as you can promise them that it is being taken care of then they too should be okay.

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onlypurples
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Post by onlypurples » Fri Jul 29, 2005 7:44 pm

Here are some of my favorites:
- "It is a long story..."
- "Don't worry about it now, you should be safe. There is a warning label on it thanks to me!"

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Post by rosie605 » Sun Jul 31, 2005 3:33 am

i've used:

"I fell"... and then it becomes and funny story about how i'm uncoordinated
"I scratched a mosquito bite too hard" (it really did work!)
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Post by Mindpoison » Sun Jul 31, 2005 5:01 am

Hmmm, with parents I used to use excuses like: Had an accident with some glassware in chemistry class. Or I used to volunteer at an animal shelter, so I'd say one of the kittens got me. It was a good, believable excuse considering a lot of animal shelter cats are less than friendly. When I was in high school I used a lot of school-related excuses. Exacto knife accident in art class...cooking class burn. It helped that my parents didn't know any of the classes I took.
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DecemberLivy
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Post by DecemberLivy » Sun Jul 31, 2005 1:12 pm

when my mum noticed them i said i fell out of bed and scratched my arm on my bedside table.. and when my friends at school noticed them i said i fell off my bike, rubish excuse
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Post by Frozen » Sun Jul 31, 2005 1:44 pm

sex with a porcupine :P

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Post by Unleash the Bats » Sun Jul 31, 2005 5:53 pm

^^^hehe- i read that email somewhere!!!

i said i got them surfing when they noticed two on my arm, not sure they fell for it but they didnt ask anymore
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pointeless
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Post by pointeless » Wed Aug 10, 2005 2:53 pm

sometims I just say ' I did it' but that's more to insignifacant people who I don't know well ironically - cos then they don't know what else to say and shut up about it.
To people who I know better, general stuff like fake falls, I dunno..., Larger scars - in an accident etc.. other than when it's words they spot... then I can't exactly say - well I fell of my bike and what dya know it scarred the word fine into my forearm lol :P
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katja
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Post by katja » Sat Aug 13, 2005 2:44 pm

there's just no way my scars would be mistaken for something else. People usually know what they are right away. I walk around with bear sleeves and people very rarely say anything. If they do I just say I used to cut myself when I was younger. Its annoying when people say "don't worry, everyone used to do that" like i just went through a phase or "you shouldn't do that, its bad"

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Post by onlypurples » Sat Aug 13, 2005 6:04 pm

Frozen wrote:sex with a porcupine :P
UNPROTECTED sex with a porcupine, for me ;) i tell them a big story about "Porky" who lives under my bed (even while in college in the dorms and that the resident assistant didn't know about it too)!!!

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heartonmysleave
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Post by heartonmysleave » Thu Aug 18, 2005 9:26 pm

I generally just say "oh, it's nothing" hide my scars and quickly change the topic. but my scars couldn't be mistaken as anything else. 'I was in a car crash' works for strangers. for people who are close to you...the truth is probably a better option.

jamie28

Post by jamie28 » Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:19 am

plastic....... the answer to many of life's little mysteries.

jamie

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what_if
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Post by what_if » Sun Aug 21, 2005 12:50 pm

Its pretty easy for me to lie about scars. I've never used the 'cat' excuse, but usually try to make a joke of it. I'm a complete klutz, so saying that i ran into a wall doesnt seem too unrealistic most times :wink:
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