Energy/motivation/focus when depressed

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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mallie
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Energy/motivation/focus when depressed

Post by mallie » Sun Jul 17, 2005 4:44 pm

I have been having a lot of trouble recently in getting anything done. I am finding even fairly simple and basic things to be hugely difficult, and I really need to find a better way to get things done even when my mood and energy are so low. I am not very motivated to do things, as I do not beleive I will enjoy them, and the effort to try seems like it is a lot more trouble than it is worth, and is far out of my reach. I know that I am probably capable of doing more than I feel like I can manage, but it is still difficult to convince myself that this is so, and actually translate it into action.

I am looking for anything that could help me actually get out of bed when I wake up, rather than the thinking about it take me an hour or two of having to contemplate it. Even knowing that I need to get up for a reason does not make the process any easier. Anything that can help me to get things done that I "ought" to, even though I don't really want to. Or even to help me do things that on some level I do want to do, but the things like focus and energy are blocking me.

My current plan is to try and plan my day a little, so that I can simply do things and not have to think about them at the time - it can be much easier to sit down and spend an hour the night before planning than to work things out as I go, or first thing in the morning. I was talking about this with my pdoc on Friday, and he thinks that if I think it could help, to go with it. I am not terribly certain about doing this, as I am very aware of the ways in which this type of strategy has failed me in the past - typically because I do not like to be too flexible (a plan is there to be followed - if I am being flexible I would have no plan at all), and when there are factors beyond my control, this does not tend to work very well. I am going to make a decent attempt at this, but I am doubtful that it will work, and am looking for ideas that might be more effective.

If anyone has some ideas on how to manage to do things when motivation, energy, focus and mood are low, especially things that have worked for you in the past (beyond things like "just do it"), I would really appreciate if you could share them with me.

Thank you.

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Post by balletomane » Sun Jul 17, 2005 5:06 pm

I have to keep reminding myself that any progress, even if I don't finish the task, is a good thing. I did this primarily with school work when I finally said, I'm not going to be able to finish this book, but reading a little is better than nothing.

I also try to make things as easy as possible on myself. So if I am working, I make myself tea, listen to soothing music, sit in a comfortable chair, etc. That way I'm not worried about uncomfortable surroundings at the same time.

I also made lists of the tasks that needed doing and listed them in order of priority. I had one essential task per day. Sometimes knowing that I didn't need to get everything done at once made it seem less daunting.

To deal with low concentration, I tried to avoid any distractions and give myself lots of breaks. It was to the point of working for two minutes and resting for 5. But that was what I could manage. I know that isn't very efficient, but I got through. eventually.

I hope some of that helps. I am really interested to see what other responses people give because I still stuggle with this a lot.

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Post by Martin » Sun Jul 17, 2005 8:33 pm

What helps me is to write a list, but to make sure that the things on there are reasonable and well-balanced. It's better to have too few things on there than too many - you can always put more down when you're done and get the feeling of really achieving something, but not getting things done can be discouraging. If there are long-term things you need to get done, just write down one little thing you can do to work towards it. If you can, reward yourself for getting stuff done. Whether it's by drawing a smilie face next to it on the list, listening to a song you like, reading a chapter in a book, whatever you like (well, try to make it something healthy/positive). Even if it doesn't pick up your mood immediately, I find it slowly helps improve my attitude and thus makes it easier to get stuff done. Try to be proud of that, say "good job" or something, even if you're heart's not in it. You can also try to smile right before and/or right after you do something. You don't have to feel happy and you don't have to have a huge grin, but a half-smile can get a few endorphins running which can give you a little bit more energy. Taking breaks consciously helps me, too. Actively relaxing can make me feel happier and more energetic, whereas staring into space just keeps me in that depressed frame of mind and "wastes time" (that's how I feel). Most of all, I try to remember that getting one thing done is better than nothing. Oh, sometimes the right music helps, too. If I'm having a very hard time getting myself to do something, I'll listen to "Right Now" by Van Halen. That usually gives me the energy to do it.

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Post by balletomane » Mon Jul 18, 2005 2:42 am

Oh, Martin's post reminded me of something I do with my to do lists. I put lots of tasks on it that are really simple. For example, every to do list has "write to do list" as the first item. I also write things that I did already (in the few minutes prior). Having things to cross out makes me feel slightly more capable. I am aware that they are all stupid little things, but it is sort of validating. It reminds me that I've done a lot already.

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Post by Martin » Mon Jul 18, 2005 4:12 am

I do that too sometimes... stuff like "brush my teeth" and "water the plants" that I always do anyways. If you write it the night before, you could even put "get out of bed" on it.

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Post by mallie » Mon Jul 18, 2005 10:37 am

Thanks B and Martin.

When I write lists I do tend to include basic things like get up, have a shower and brush my teeth. I include these kind of basic things, because at the moment, they are things I am having trouble with. I try to think of things that are not basic should-be-automatic things, so that there is something on there that could make it seem like I have done something in the day. As much as the typical automatic things need doing, they don't really count for much in terms of feeling productive or useful. But I am still not convinced that lists or timetables are the answer.

With regards to taking breaks, and doing little bits at a time, for some things this doesn't work (like the basic looking after oneself things) and for others I find it really difficult to manage. In terms of reading, if I look at just a paragraph or page, I tend to get lost because I can't integrate it all in my mind. Tiny snippets on their own aren't enough for the things I'm reading, I need the focus there so I can do enough that it makes some kind of sense. At the moment, I am not aiming very high, typically things are not complex enough that there can be progress before completion - things are either done or they are not.

I am feeling incredibly stuck, because I am having so much trouble getting things done. If I plan things, they tend to not get done/finished which makes me feel bad, and I've still not done anything. If I don't plan, I get overwhelmed by having to work out what is happening, and things don't get done. Often trying to push through things that aren't working does not end well. I've just spent an hour and a half writing the above part of this post, and my head is screaming at me because I've not let my mind go elsewhere. I just can't work out why things are so hard.

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Post by limestone » Tue Jul 19, 2005 9:19 am

just wanted to say that i too am having trouble with this. sometimes playing upbeat, really upbeat music helps me: at full volume.

also, reading small parts (And i mean small) from the book: 'threads of hope: learning to live with depression, a collection of writing edited by flora mcdonnell' can help me feel not alone.

there's one where they say to just get outside, no matter what the weather. i like that one, even though i find that hard.

mallie, you know the getting out of bed: is there a way of setting 2 or 4 alarm clocks either at the same time or slightly apart (say 3 or 5 minutes) and put them somewhere where you have to take 5 or more steps out of bed to turn them off?

mallie, sometimes i reward myself with stickers for going for a walk which has helped in the past. at the moment, i try to go for a walk at 9.30 and then out somewhere either to uni or elsewhere at 1.00. but today that is not happening.

i'm not much help here. just want you to know you're not alone. not by a long shot.

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Post by Bathelina » Tue Jul 19, 2005 9:25 am

I want to say that I have the same troubles as you. I think everyone's given excellent advice, and I'm sorry I don't have anymore, but I relate and I understand :)

Hannah x
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Post by mallie » Tue Jul 19, 2005 1:00 pm

Limestone, thank you for such wonderful ideas. I really think some of these are things that can help :)

Hannah, thanks for replying. I do appreciate knowing I am not alone in such thoughts.
limestone wrote:there's one where they say to just get outside, no matter what the weather. i like that one, even though i find that hard.
I typically hate going outside unless I need to. Getting into a pattern of doing it would be a good idea. I've been trying to think of ways I can leave the house, on most, if not all days. I managed to get up to the shopping centre and do some errands today, and go to an exercise class, so that seemed very productive. I have T on thursday, and should be going to another aquarobics class on friday, but still have to think of something for tomorrow.
limestone wrote:mallie, you know the getting out of bed: is there a way of setting 2 or 4 alarm clocks either at the same time or slightly apart (say 3 or 5 minutes) and put them somewhere where you have to take 5 or more steps out of bed to turn them off?
I was thinking the other day of buying an alarm clock where you can program your own messages, and have it tell me to get up because I have to do X. I saw it in the catalogue, but not in the store or I would have.

Once I get up, I can typically stay up. Moving the alarm clock from next to my bed sounds like a fabulous idea. It makes a dreadful beeping noise, that I can't ignore for long so that would force me up. I am definately going to try this :) [however, I don't think I will look that way in the morning ;)]

I've never quite understood using stickers as a reward. I'd feel like I was wasting them. I have quite a collection of various shiny stickers and keep forgetting to use them when I write letters and such. But some kind of reward (and I really should steer away from chocolate) could be a good idea. I'd say cuddling Miss Tillius but somehow I think she'd object (typical cat ;))

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Post by limestone » Tue Jul 19, 2005 8:21 pm

mallie wrote:.. I've been trying to think of ways I can leave the house, on most, if not all days....but still have to think of something for tomorrow.
hi again, ^^ i too need a reason to leave the house. recently i've begun to buy a newspaper at the end of a 20 min walk which has helped. i do have a little pile of papers gathering on the floor, but i'm not too bothered about them atm :wink: i figure i'll read them/dip into them when i want to.
mallie wrote:.. I've never quite understood using stickers as a reward. I'd feel like I was wasting them...
^^ i felt the same re. wasting good stickers. so i bought some plain star stickers: '336 chart stickers' - Carson-Dellosa motivational products' for £1.99. i stuck them on my calender each time i went for a walk. just seeing them slowly mount up really helped. it made me feel good.

:blush:

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