oh, crap! very hurt.....

[angelofstone]

How do ya'll deal with people saying you SI for attention and that you can't possibly know REAL pain? Someone said that to me and I want to cut so badly....

[limestone]

How do ya'll deal with people saying you SI for attention and that you can't possibly know REAL pain? Someone said that to me and I want to cut so badly....

hi
I'm sorry to hear you want to hurt yourself. Sometimes people are afraid of self-injury and they say stupid things. Maybe you could talk to them and ask what they mean by 'real pain'. Then you'll be able to clarify for them just how badly *you're* feeling and that might help them to understand more.

They don't understand, but that doesn't mean you have to carry on that misunderstanding and apply it to yourself.

By that I mean, maybe you can identify with a little of what they said. re. for attention and that might be why you feel upset and then want to hurt yourself. You need attention as otherwise you wouldn't be hurting yourself but that isn't the same thing as the sense by how they meant 'attention'.

You could explain to them and to yourself the ways you tried to cope before turning to si. Then to think about what and how you need attention. It gets thrown around the whole 'omg, someone thinks I do this for attention' but it's like a blessing in disguise when someone says that. It makes you think, and by thinking you're learning more about yourself.

What I'm trying to say is try to validate where you are, what you need and how you could try new things to help you. e.g. recognise you're having a hard time, that you need support and that one new thing might be to find someone professional to talk to.

It's easy to sit back and let peoples' comments hurt you but taking positive action (not hurting yourself) is how ultimately, I believe, it can bring you closer to feeling better about yourself and towards the person who said the comment.

Hope that makes sense/helps,
limestone

[Bathelina]

That is a really mean thing of someone to say.

I reckon it means they don't understand. It's hard to understand SH if you've never. I admit, I used to take a pretty similar approach to it.

But now I don't take that. You know that you don't do it for attention, it's an escape, a way out - and it's not really that good for you though.

Don't cut over such a stupid person. They deserve to be slapped. It's terrible to hear that sort of comment made about you when you're going through a rough time.

Just ignore them and their stupid comments. They don't know what they're talking about.

Only you know how you feel and why you do this, no one else. So don't let some idiot ruin your life.

Stay positive, focus on distracting yourself from this. And DON'T CUT. Do things that make you happy; like listening to music, going on MSN, going on BUS - it helps me more than anything else - calling someone; talking to a friend... anything.

Even if it's silly or selfish, you only get one shot at life and you have to enjoy it.

I get hard times, like now, and I'm coping quite well at the moment. I'm distracting myself buy going on BUS and concentrating on [helping people with] other problems and giving the best advice I can.

Hang in there, it's OK. You are not alone. Stay positive and be happy.

Lots of love and best wishes,
Hannah :):):)