*sigh* I was just thinking about death. Is there any way to ever deal with it? All of the deaths I've ever had to deal with have been people or animals that were very close to me. When I was 8 My grandpa died. He and I had always been very close I still haven't gotten over it. I just feel weird asbout it. This is going to sound weird, but I talk to him a lot. He comes to me to help me through hard times, but I know it would be better if he were here with me always.
Then last year my dog died. It might not seem bad, but she was there for as long as I can remember. I miss her so much. She was my puppy as much as I was her puppy. She was part of my family. I didnt want her to be gone so much that it took until this past week for me to mourn her. I really miss her.
This past september a senior in my school killed himself. Since then I hasvent been the same. I knew him. Not well, but I still knew him. Later that month I kept waking up screaming. I kept dreaming about him. He was in my dreams trying to explain why he killed himself. Why me? I never told anyone what he said to me. I believe that it is true, but it irks me. Sometimes when i am alone I can aslmost feel him there. I mean he didnt even know me!!!! I sw him in school a lot, but other than that we weerent close or anything. Why would I be having these dreams, why would I feel his presence? I feel so curdened from that. It scares me. I mean I know I can talk to ghosts when I wish to, but still it was creepy. Very few spirits who don't know me will talk to me. I realize I may seem insane, but every word of this is true. I don't know what to tell him. I feel bad. I wich i could be rid of my curses.
Death possible *SU*
- PinkPokaDottedBunnyRabbit
- growing roots
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Death possible *SU*
My shadows the only one that walks beside me
My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there
will find me
'Till then I'll walk alone
My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there
will find me
'Till then I'll walk alone
- snowangel_03
- my other car is a bus
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*hugs* You don't sound insane hun. Not one bit
This is just my POV, but I don't know if anyone really gets over losing someone close to them. My grandfather died a long time ago, and I still miss him and want to talk to him.
It's hust the way the human mind works with this sort of thing...
Take care hun.
Nicki
xxxx
This is just my POV, but I don't know if anyone really gets over losing someone close to them. My grandfather died a long time ago, and I still miss him and want to talk to him.
It's hust the way the human mind works with this sort of thing...
Take care hun.
Nicki
xxxx
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- PinkPokaDottedBunnyRabbit
- growing roots
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- Joined: Thu Jun 03, 2004 9:02 pm
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- PinkPokaDottedBunnyRabbit
- growing roots
- Posts: 782
- Joined: Thu Jun 03, 2004 9:02 pm
- Location: Hell
its funny, beacuse the only death I've been thinking about since I wrote this is my own. I wanna die so much. I cant cope with the fact that I shouldnt, and yet inside I don't care. All I really want is to die. I think about it day and night. All the time. I even know many ways I could do it.
My shadows the only one that walks beside me
My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there
will find me
'Till then I'll walk alone
My shallow hearts the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there
will find me
'Till then I'll walk alone
- PinkPokaDottedBunnyRabbit
- growing roots
- Posts: 782
- Joined: Thu Jun 03, 2004 9:02 pm
- Location: Hell
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